Post # 1

Member
316 posts
Helper bee
Hi Bees, I had a rough day today and need a mini vent! I’ve had plenty of friends getting engaged lately, but they had all been dating for years. When a friend announced her engagement today after less than a year dating, for some reason it threw me off more than normal. I am very happy for them, and don’t think they’re rushing, but my 8 year anniversary is coming up and that made it more frustrating this time to know I’m still waiting. I have a great relationship and know my SO so well, and I understand that other people’s engagements don’t have anything to do with our path, but when I’m not rational about it I start wondering “why not me?”
SO hadn’t been in a rush to propose since we won’t get married til we finish our education and move to the same place, but he has said it would happen by the end of the year. I haven’t even hinted at it in 3 weeks… less than 3 months to go! Must stay strong!
Post # 3

Member
1297 posts
Bumble bee
I know the feeling. I am in the EXACT same position. Friends around me getting engaged and having babies, just over 7 1/2 yrs together and an end of year promise.
I know it’s hard but try and stay strong. I haven’t been doing this very much recently but the bee helps 🙂
Post # 4

Member
320 posts
Helper bee
I think we all have those days that we just have had too much, and we want to put our ‘rational’ selves aside and give in to the little jealous person inside of you. I know I do from time to time. It’s very difficult when you see people around you that are still so young in their relationship (dating a year, or even less) moving forward and getting married when you are 8 years in and feel like you aren’t going anywhere. I also find it difficult not to have a little internal ‘tantrum’ when I learn of someone’s engagement if that person has a horrible or boring personality, cheats, is spoiled, any number of character flaws, lol! It’s probably a little mean and immature, but it’s true!
Post # 5

Member
220 posts
Helper bee
I can relate to MisfitPrincesss’s description of an “internal tantrum.” I hate the feelings of resentment and “why not me.” And then I beat myself up for my inability to be happy for others’ engagements/weddings without having a mental pity party. I usually feel a lot better after a day or two. Hang in there, some moments are really tough!
Post # 6

Member
316 posts
Helper bee
@MisfitPrincess: I love your “internal tantrum” phrase, I’m going to remember that. And I agree, it’s even worse when there is something about the person that really annoys you. Next time that happens, I am totally having my personal tantrum so that I can laugh about it to myself afterwards and move on =) Thanks for the support ladies!
Post # 7

Member
320 posts
Helper bee
@DustyRose: No problem girlie, glad to help
and most of all just glad I’ve finally found a place full of people like us, and where my feelings can be helful to people instead of annoying! hehe
Post # 8

Member
667 posts
Busy bee
I totally understand. I’ve been with my SO for just over 7 years and it has gotten to me really badly sometimes too, expecially when the couple has not been together that long. When my cousin got engaged to his Girlfriend at two years and we were on 5 1/2, it hurt like crazy and made me have all sorts of “Why not me? What’s wrong with me?” thoughts.
@misfitprincess: I think we all those internal tantrums and it’s normal to feel that way. I also love having the Bee because I can commiserate with all you wonderful ladies and offer encouragement when others are down.
Post # 9

Member
1088 posts
Bumble bee
@DustyRose: It’s rough when something like that strikes a cord. Kudos to you for staying strong, especially with your friend announcing her engagement!