Post # 1
My fiance and I met with the pastor of my church on Tuesday morning. I’m fairly good friends with him, as I teach CCD and am on the parish council, but for some reason, I was so incredibly nervous for our first official meeting. It went so well! My priest really made my non-Catholic (Presbyterian) fiance feel welcome, asked us to tell us about our personal stories (where we were born, our families, where we went to school, how we moved to current town, how we met, got engaged, etc.) It was a great meeting! We talked a lot about the next four meetings and he gave us the Celebrating Marriage book by Paul Covino. He also let my fiance know that his pastor could do the readings and give a blessing that could be non-Catholic! I just felt so at ease and so excited. I’m such a nerd. I read the Celebrating Marriage book from cover to cover last night. I am just so excited! Just had to share with other Catholic brides.
A few questions:
My priest prefers the PMI (pre-marital inventory) to FOCUS that the associate pastor uses. Have any of you completed the PMI? I am such a nerd and looked up the instrument at my work library. How is it different from FOCUS?
The workbook talks about how it isn’t Catholic to walk down the aisle with your father. Rather, it is preferred you walk down with your parents, your fiance or by yourself in a processional. I’ve only seen this done at my grad school friend’s wedding in Mexico, NEVER at a US Catholic wedding. What are you all doing? I actually like the idea of the processional, but my mom wants my dad to walk me down the aisle, which is odd since she is a devout Catholic and Catholic educator.
Post # 3
I’m glad things went so well for you! Congrats on starting the process!
I took the PMI in college for a scoiology class, and the PMI is actually very similar to the FOCCUS test. Both tests are designed for the purpose of highlighting compatiblities/incompatibilities in the couple and to further discussion in these areas. If I remember right, the PMI had more questions about finances/spending and more specific questions about lifestyle expectations. I feel like the FOCCUS test was more general (e.g. “Faith is important in my life” versus “I prefer to attend church every Sunday.”)
I believe most Catholic churches prefer that bride and groom walk down the aisle together or that the bride walks down alone. The “giving away of the bride” tradition is actually Protestant, not Catholic. My husband and I decided to walk down the aisle with both of our parents, which I thought was nice. If you or your family really wants your dad (only) to walk you down the aisle, though, just ask your priest. Most churches are flexible on this, even though they have a preference.
Post # 4
Thanks Mrs. Spring! I really want to walk down the aisle with my fiance or my parents. My fiance has never seen this at a Christian wedding so I’m curious to see what other Catholic brides are doing.
Post # 5
I really liked that both my husband and I walked down the aisle with our moms and dads. I felt like it symbolized leaving our families and joining together to make new family. 🙂 I also really like the symbology of a bride and groom walking down the aisle together; I think it would be very beautiful and moving (although I haven’t seen it in real life, either). Good luck!