(Closed) Hair & makeup trial by friend = disaster! [pic heavy]

posted 9 years ago in Beauty
Post # 3
1430 posts
Bumble bee

I was in the same boat. Good friend who is a professional did my hair and makeup.  Hair was good but we did several make up trials and both the ones before my wedding I didn’t like how I looked..I was able to give my feed back and she is so open to critques because she cares so much about the bride feeling her most beautiful but on the day of I still didn’t like it. But it wasn’t just her.. Every time Ive ever had my make up done for other people weddings I didn’t like how I looked either and had to touch it up. But looking back on wedding pics I just wish I would have done my own make-up. I would have felt and looked more like myself. I def did not feel that I looked my most beautiful I’ve ever looked make up wise on my wedding day. I know it is hard telling her how you feel but TRUST me it is better to do that or go with someone else than to be unhappy with how you look on your wedding day or in photos.

Post # 5
1664 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2011

Would this work- tell her your mother/sister/bridesmaid is very particular about her hair and will only go to x hairstylist.  It is very important to mother/sister/bridesmaid that you get ready with her on the day of your wedding, mother/sister/bridesmaid has offered to pay, and you feel rude to turn it down.

I see that you said you can’t afford a professional, but would it be obvious that it wasn’t professionally done?  If so, maybe you should be up front about it and say you aren’t used to wearing a lot of makeup and want to just look like you do on a regular day and should just do it yourself.

Post # 6
174 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

My friend just faced the EXACT same situation… Here’s what she (with my help did).

She had her trials, and hated it…. (To be fair I saw this coming, as her friend is a hair dresser not a makeup artist… but anywayyysss)….

She had me “buy” her hair and makeup for her wedding day “as a gift”, and give it to her… “OMG.. Your friend was going to do it?! I had no idea!” so she explained to her friend that she didnt want to hurt my feelings, and that she thought I spent outside of my budget to do that for her, so she couldn’t tell me she wasn’t going to use it. Then she also explain to her friend that now, this way she’ll get to enjoy the day and relax….
The hairdress friend understood, and my friend (the bride) booked a hairdresser and MUA for the day.

Maybe a similar situation could arise for you?

Personally, I understand wanting to save money…. (gosh weddings are expensive)… but I would hire professionals at this point, otherwise you risk looking back at your photos and being like “damn…. that sucks”. I’m a MUA, and I often get calls from brides with a month – two weeks left until their wedding saying “OMG! SOS… PLEASE HELP” because a similar situation happened to them…. Blurrign the lines between vendor and friend always gets tricky.. b/c their doing a favour for you.. how can you tell them they suck.. lol…


Hope that helps!

Post # 7
746 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Did you take any pictures of yourself after the trial? We might be able to see if it is salvagable at all…

I went to a hair trial with the lady who cuts my mom’s hair, and I hated it. I got a trial somewhere else and liked it a lot better, and so I texted the first woman and told her I would not be able to use her because my BMs and I wanted to all get our hair and makeup done at the same salon. (This hairdresser would have had to do all 4 of our hair and I would have had to find a separate makeup person.) Are any of your BMs getting their hair or makeup done as well? You could say, “well, Bridesmaid or Best Man has really sensitive skin and she will ONLY go to XX makeup artist, so I think we’re going to go with her. I’m so sorry! How much can I pay you for the trial?”

Post # 8
2779 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

 I think you need to be direct and tell her what you want, and what you didn’t like. Also with regards to your hair, naturally wavy of not, if you don’t use a curling iron with heat and some strong hold product it will fall flat, and you won’t get the curls/waves you want. Natural hair will perform as your natural hair naturally does, if it poofs and frizzes in heat/humidity then it still will if left naturally wavy. 

Post # 9
942 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

My suggestions, shop around. Go get another hair trial if you can, it’s so important they get it right. Getting your hair to look like the painting – and hold it’s shape ALL day seems like a mammoth task? My hair would drop within about 30 mins with that style and requires a TON of hairspray & teasing to hold. Maybe your friend was thinking the same thing? For the makeup, pick your colours before you go. You could even take in your own and tell her exactly how you want it applied.?

Post # 10
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Shaerena:  As a makeup artist myself… if you’re unhappy with the make up, the artist should have picked it up. I am fully qualified hair dresser, but I am a full on makeup artist, and we tend to seperate these two areas. (Make up artists usually only STYLE the hair and nothing else).

If she hasn’t picked up that your unhappy with your make up… I would personally be worried. I can always tell when my brides are happy with it or not. Kind of like finding THE dress deal… a happy bride expresses her pleasure in the trial. 

I think it would be better for you to find a professional or just do your own make up. If saving money appeals to you, here’s a lil suggestion. You can go to the mall/department store and get your make up done… for example mac or bobbi brown usually or any other brands are usually happy to do your whole face to sell you the product. You can pick up a few items that you can continue to use after the wedding and you can have the make up brand artist explain things to you if you like what you see. Of course you should keep an eye on what is being applied and how.

Honesty is best policy…but from experience in dealing with teams of make up artist.. gotta admitt not all make up artist are good at taking criticism. 

If you’re afraid of hurting your friend… and don’t want to tell her the truth, perhaps you can assign her to a task and ask her help with it rather than your makeup & hair. Or maybe a lil fib? say a family member had already paid for an artist to come in and it’s not refundable. 

Good luck~ and if you do end up doing DIY make up… just remember to pick a good foundation that handles flash photography well. No minerals or oil based! 🙂

Post # 11
235 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Shaerena:  Oh, and if you have specific look in mind… like the photo you have posted above, show the make up artist that photo. Depending on your face shape, natural colors adjustments will be needed, BUT they should be able to work with you to create the look you want! 🙂

Post # 12
58 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Mmmmm. I think if you offend her, it might end up stressing you just as much. And you don’t ned stress right now.

I think if you tell a lie, you will still be stressed about her finding out / seeing through it / being offended.

I think you need to be honest with her but still take her up on her offer of help. (A lovely gift)

Can you ask her for another trial? Tell her that you have looked at the look again, in photos, and you would like to try something different. I don’t know why she chose the blue eyeshadow and red lipstick….maybe that’s how she intertprets “light and natural”. The blues, to me, look really 1980’s. Can you ask her to try a different, more neutral palette – browns and peaches, maybe? You could flatter her by asking her what she thinks suits you. Let her try that out. Keep having trials until you’re happy. That’s what you would do with a professional you have comitted to. Basically, she’s not doing your wedding make-up until she gets it right in tirals (maybe even a few times!). Yes, you might end up being a pain in the backside for her but she offered this as a gift. You  might be able to turn the situation round if you can work through this with her. You will need to communicate openly with whatever make-up artist you choose, so you may as well give this girl another shot. Think how great you will feel if she does a great trial next time and at your wedding – you will be able to thank her, genuinely, and remember her kind gift forever.

She’s not the boss of your look – you are. But she is offering to help. She needs to know that you’re not happy. If you really have no time, or she still doesn’t improve at all, that’s another matter.

The red lips – lips are often an issue. Some things look great in inspiration pictures on other people – the reality is often a world away. What I would do is find your own shade by visiting a few make-up counters, and then have her just apply it for you. For me, this colour red is lovely, but it does not suit the blue eye shadow nor does it meet the description light and natural.

Okay, the hair. Yes, I agree- not great. I also agree it will be hard to achieve what you have in mind. She should have been willing to try what you wanted to try. Again, have another trial with her and if the worst comes to the worst, go to a few other places and have trials there, just to see if it can actually be achieved. For what it’s worth, I think your hair is gorgeous naturally.

Post # 13
5397 posts
Bee Keeper

Nobody ever wants to offend a friend but I would much rather be honest than look like a frizzy clown in my wedding pictures. One way or another you need to find someone else to do your makeup/hair or do it yourself. 

About the hair, you have to be realistic. With your length of hair, not many styles are going to hold. I think you need to figure out what you want because you say you don’t want a style with curling irons, etc but if you leave it your natural texture, that is what you’re gonna have. If you want your natural texture then go with it, but if you don’t, accept that you will need product and styling tools!

I would hunt around for a pro that’s budget friendly and just splurge because you want to look fabulous on your wedding day. If that’s absolutely not an option, maybe you could have someone at sephora or Mac do your makeup, but you would need to purchase some products. 

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