(Closed) Hand delivered Invitation tackiness meter – HELP!!!

posted 7 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
14495 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

I am usually all about doing things the “proper” way, but you are having a small destination wedding with your nearest and dearest so I think it would be more than fine to hand deliver them.  I would love to receive something so personal directly from the person.

Post # 5
1684 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think hand delivered is more than fine. 

I also think sticking them in mailboxes is an acceptable choice. 

Are you totally set on this glass bottle thing? Because I would think a paper invitation in the shape of a glass bottle would suffice as well.

Post # 6
1686 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

I would not think it was tacky at all to hand deliver them.

Post # 7
39 posts
  • Wedding: December 2011

My invitations are also invites in a bottle and Fiance and I will deliver most of them personally.

Post # 8
14495 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

@Island_Bride_In_April: I wouldn’t feel bad at all, I think it is a fun way to deliver it.  It would even add to the excitement of the wedding.  Go with your dream invites and enjoy the happy reactions that you get.  To get around some of those few judgmental family members, consider having someone deliver them for you, like your Maid/Matron of Honor.  Then they are still “delivered” without the cost of the mail.

Post # 9
2889 posts
Sugar bee

We hand delivered a lot of our family invites because Darling Husband wanted to do it. They were standard paper and no one thought it odd. In fact, it was at a fmaily get tto gether (someone’s birthday but nothing formal) so everyone opened them together and it was kind of nice to see them open them. We also got some instant verbal RSVPs but told them to reply properly. I think the bottle idea is cute and would make for a nice hand deliver. Maybe yu can do a paper only version for the ones that need to be mailed. Hand delivering also gives you the chance to see people’S reaction to the bottle.

Post # 10
647 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

I don’t know why it would be tacky to hand-deliver them.  I think it’s fun to get stuff in the mail, but I would think it was a waste of money if I got an invitation that I knew cost $10 to ship.

You could also do as a previous poster suggested and go stick them in people’s mailboxes.  I also wouldn’t give people an explanation as to why you are hand delivering them.  I can’t imagine why anyone would ask why they weren’t receiving them in the mail, but if they did, you could just say you spent so much time on them you didn’t want them to get damaged!

Post # 11
2854 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Not sure why it would be tacky either. You’re putting in way more effort to get the invite out.

Save the $$ and put them into your awesome party. Your guests will appreciate that!

Post # 12
6394 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011

I would think it would be adorable :). I wouldn’t be offended at all!

Post # 13
110 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: January 2016

I don’t think it would be tacky. Doesn’t old/technical/formal etiquette dictate you should hand deliver them? I don’t know, I may be wrong on this.

I’d stay away from the reasoning why you are hand delivering them. If you showed up at my door, even with the best of intentions, saying it’s too pricey to mail then I’d probably think it’s tacky. I’d use the moment to say “we really want you to celebrate with us” instead of “postage is too expensive”.

Or, like a PP said, put it in their mailbox yourself. I think it’d be cool to come home, check the mail and find a little surprise… knowing you obviously put it there instead of mailing it. I think that’s pretty sweet if you’re not having a terribly formal wedding.


ETA: Be sure to map out a good stop-by-stop map. It’d suck to waste a bunch of gas (although not equal to price of postage but can still get high) and time if it’s not well executed.


ETA x2: LOL, sorry! THought of something else. If you were to deliver them in their mailboxes, would you be able to do it one day? While it normally takes different times for the post office to deliver, I’d think if it’s one of those obviously not mailed but placed in the mailbox thing, you may have people say, “Hey, did you X’s invitation? It’s so cute, etc etc etc” and the other party to not have gotten it yet might feel left out. I dunno…. I’m totally over thinking this andi t’s way too early to start with that.

Post # 14
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I always liked the hand delivered invitations.  That way, it was personal and I get a visit from the friend that is bringing them.

I would hand deliver what you can and mail traditional ones to the out of town guests.

Post # 15
478 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

It seems like it will be more personal hand delivering! I like the mailbox idea too!

Post # 16
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2010

Hand delivering is much more personal than sending them in the mail. I can’t imagine why anyone would be disappointed. If anyone says anything, just tell them that you were going to throw them in the ocean so they would wash up on shore at their homes, but the tide has been been funky lately with the weather, so you didn’t think they would find it in time.


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