(Closed) Handing out invites rather than mailing – yes or no?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
Post # 3
Member
5668 posts
Bee Keeper

@muzikfreek13: I’m not sure if there is etiquette regarding this, but I’d avoid passing out invites to coworkers unless you’re inviting the whole office. Someone is going to notice what you’re doing and you’ll more than likely end up with someone who’s upset.

Post # 4
Member
2320 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think the proper etiquette is to mail them! But it’s pointless if you think about it, why waste the postage!?!?!

I would make sure that you actually hand it to them, not leave it on there desk or in the mailbox, etc. 

Post # 5
Member
1676 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I think as long as you’re doing it in a setting where everyone is getting one. I’m purposely sending mine out around Easter so I can hand all of my family their invites at my Grandmother’s. But probably a no-no if you’re in the office coffee room and only one person gets one.

Post # 6
Member
2320 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

@Aure: Good call!

Post # 7
Member
1844 posts
Buzzing bee

I have gotten a few hand delivered invites from close friends when I see them, I think it is sweet getting a chance to talk to them about thier cute rsvp cards and pretty ribbons. If it is someone you see on a regular basis I think it is fine, but like Aure said I would probably avoid handing them out infront of others who arn’t invited.

I totally understand saving a few dollars on postage, every little bit helps.

Post # 8
Member
44 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I am mailing most of ours.  Its easier that way.  I will hand out save the dates at work, although I am not inviting everyone.  I work at a large company, so perhaps that acceptable?  Otherwise I would end up spending a lot more on gas than it cost for postage!

Post # 9
Member
7609 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Good question!  I’ve been planning on mailing mine, but we’re not having a large wedding.  I think it perks people up to get something in the mail that isn’t a bill, so I’m probably going to mail all of mine, even to our families (whom we see weekly).

Post # 10
Member
3255 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I think it’s okay to hand-deliver some, but as PPs said, I would be very careful of doing this at work so as not to create unnecessary drama. We hand-delivered to our neighbor, for instance, because it felt kind of stupid to mail it to him. haha

Post # 11
Member
5296 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: January 1993

I hand delivered to our parents and a couple of my co-workers, but otherwise I mailed. 

Post # 12
Member
842 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I’m hand delivering a whole bunch to our friends at work. For me, offending people isn’t too likely. I work in a gigantic office with a thousand cubes, and i’ll be inviting all of our friends – pretty much everyone we go to lunch with, hang out outside of work, etc. I’m friendly with other people, but not to the point where I think they expect to be invited to our wedding. Plus, several of my friends have done this. IMO makes more sense than wasting $ on postage.

Post # 13
Member
450 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: March 2012

I passed 6 out this past weekend to people out at our camp. Fiance will give some to friends next week, the rest I will mail next week.

Post # 14
Member
11356 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: May 2009

I’m sure I will be in the minority here, but I definitely would mail them.  This not only helps to avoid the potential for hurt feelings that some PPs mentioned, but also it does not present your guests with the dilemma of what to do with the invitation now that he or she has it in his or her hands at work or in some type of social setting.  I know how many pieces of paper were floating around in my office, and I would not want my wedding invitation to become lost amid a pile of work papers or tucked inside of a desk drawer, or even bent and twisted to fit inside of a purse or briefcase. 

Also, when the mail arrives at a person’s home, he or she usually has some type of protocol for how mail is handled. Bills go here, important pending items requiring action (such as invitations) go there. It is just easier, cleaner to do this.

Finally, to me, sending and receiving wedding invitations somehow feels “majestic.” I have always LOVED opening my mailbox and finding a wedding invitation in there — in all of its beauty and splendor.  It’s one of the happiest things someone can receive in the mail, amid all of the junk mail, advertising circulars, catalogues, bills, etc.  This is your wedding. Let your invitation make a statement all on its own when it arrives! Smile

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