- 8 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
I was going at it with my SO we were having one heck of a great time! I swear the end of the world could have come and we wouldn’t have noticed… After we are done, he pulls me onto his chest and we cuddled, but then he went to kiss me on my forehead and noticed that I had unfortunatly gotten my period a little early because of all of his wonderful moves… Poor guy freaked out thought he “broke” me. I was horribly embarrased but thank goodness he was such a sweetie about it, wouldn’t even let me clean anything but myself up.
A few weeks ago he was on top and I wanted to be all “controlling” for him. I pushed him off me, he landed next to me. I leapt up and turned to hop on top of him and my outside leg slipped right off the bed and I landed on the floor! We bot laughed hysterically and I mentioned that I will NEVER be on top again (teasing of course!)
His little sister walking in on us (she was 19) but it was still pretty terrible. Why dont people knock?! Haha
Before I met DH I had been with a few guys, but I never really got “comfortable” with them; I’d never even given a BJ before we met… Anyway– he’s A LOT more experienced than me, and had been with a lot of girls which made me really self concious when we first met. So, I had never actually told him that I’d never been on top before. So, one night he insists that I be on top, and I didn’t want to kill the moment so I figured I would just wing it… Well, needless to say, I had a bit of a rhythm/spacing issue, and he “slipped out” and I landed pretty hard on him. I seriously thought I had broken his junk!!! I was so mortified, he was ok a few days later, just a little tender, but it was almost 6 weeks before I’d even touch him again because I felt so bad. And a good 3+ months before I’d even talk about the idea of me being on top again, and I still tend to keep things pretty slow “just in case”!
Oh my goodness. This is a great thread haha. I’m glad to know I’m not the only one with crazy stories.
My fiancé was fingering and eating me out on the stairs once and he was getting pretty rough and so once I was exhausted I went in the upstairs bathroom to clean up and I see blood on my legs…mind you, my period wasn’t coming for a couple months. There was some blood on my hands too and so I go downstairs and yell “babe!” and he was in the downstairs bathroom. Evidently, he’d cut me with his fingernail somehow and he “looked like a vampire” because there was blood all around his mouth and on his hands (but cleaned it off before I saw).
Thankfully, we still laugh about it. He also doesn’t ever finger me anymore. haha.
I think one story of mine would be the time I forgot there was a tampon in. Just, why. 30 minute of me digging around ( I want to cry right now) in my vag was NOT as fun as it looks in porn.
Then there was the time I was getting hot and heavy with a dude. I wasn’t on my period, but there was blood. Everywhere. Awesome. All over his bed. Yeah, his girlfriend was out of town (we were young and dumb)..and he panicked throwing sheets in the washer while I’m in the bathroom freaking out.
Ugh. I feel like I can tell these stories all day. Cringe. I should probably stop having the sex.
Marking this to read later. I don’t think work would appreciate me reading this here! Keep them coming ladies!
When DH and I first started dating, I was in college about 2 hours away and lived in a apartment with 3 other girls. The first time he visited me, all of my roommates were out for the night, so he didn’t get to meet them.
Since we were alone, we decided to have some fun with ice cream. We lit some candles in my bedroom and went to town. About 15 minutes later, the fire alarm in our apartment started going off. For some reason, he decided to jump up and run into my living room wearing only his boxers and melted chocolate ice cream surrounding his mouth. I follwed after him in a towel with ice cream covering my chest.
We ran right into my 2 roommates who had decided to come home early that night.
Needless to say, it was a very awkward introduction….
The best part of all this is that we can look at someone else and think O god that would be worse! Keep them coming!
The first time i had anal sex was with my high school sweetheart. we had given our virginity to each other, so obviously it was a first for anal for both of us .anywhoooo he came in my butt and pulled it out and all kinda stuff came squirting out. it was so embarrassing! neither of us knew what to expect and That happened. He stood there staring at me and i finally yelled “are you gona clean me up??!!” def the most embarrassing moment in my sexual history.
Our cat once jumped on the bed, and went behind him by his (we were in missionary) and licked my SO in a spot no cats should be licking. It was really really funny to me, not so much to him!
Yeah I have a “started my period during sex” incident, too. It got on his shoulder, and it was dark, so for some reason, i thought it was chocolate. I cries, I was so embarrassed. Queefing is embarrassing for me, too. I’ve been asked in on mid and post coitus.
I was having casual sex with a former FB, and we were in a rush. He kept his shirt on, and I was riding on top of him. Period conveniently started, and I bled ALL over his white shirt. That was pretty humiliating.
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