(Closed) Hangs head a little…

posted 8 years ago in Intimacy
Post # 32
328 posts
Helper bee

Ok this might well be the most embarassing thing hands down that I will EVER face in my life.

So, I’d been dating a guy a few years older then me when I was in high school, and my parents didn’t know. He was 21 and I was 17 for nearly a year, we were sooo close to legalitys but at just 2 weeks before my 18th birthday, we decided we couldn’t wait any longer. We couldn’t go to his house because he had roommates, nor to mine, and couldn’t afford a room. So I spotted an empty parking garage near a freeway and things were getting hot and heavy, and well, we were naked and making out, when…. a police car pulls up, shines his flashlight at us and while we’re sitting there freaking out, calls back up. 2 more cars of officers come (prob because it was a slow night). It was like 6 guys the 4 new guys walk up to our car and surround us on either sides laughing. This was only the first part of embarassment.

2. In my scramble to grab my stuff and since I was a minor I had to go to sit in back of a squad car. I forgot my bra in my bf’s car at the time Undecidedand (for those of us with big boobs, you need that to go into public with) I had to ask the police officer that was arresting me, to go get my bra… Yes, o m g.

3. On the way to the poice station, the cop admitted that he thought I was a prostitute (because evidently the place I’d picked was a typical place for protitutes to take their johns. and I was very skinny at the time and he was er..heavyset)

4 Last but not all. It is typical practice for minors who get arrested (after curfew) for their parents to pick them up, when the officer called my mom as I was sitting in the cell, my single mom who was at home refused to come pick me up. the officer could not be responsible to keep a minor overnight so he had to drive me home. At my house the officer greeted my mom telling her I’d been found naked in the seat of so and so’s car in a parking garage after curfew and that in addition, they made sure to include the prostitute part. She in turn told my brother who knew the guy and was friends with him.

and that…is how my mom met my boyfriend, or foundout I was dating him.

These are lessons of what not to do and why my future daughter will never get away with anything. Most embarassing thing, ever.



Post # 33
335 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Let me start my little story by telling you a that I am very sensitive to heat, I’ve been known to blackout at the swimming pool after going in the steam room…. I was seeing this new guy and we were doing it in the shower. He was behind me and I was bent over facing the wall, we were in there awhile…..next thing I know I’m lying in the tub with this guy crouched over me saying, “thank god, I was trying to think of a place to hide the body lol”. That was the last time we saw eachother 🙂

Post # 34
196 posts
Blushing bee

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@cirk:  LOL! My cat likes to sleep on the bed, and gets very annoyed when we take over, but he wouldn’t go this far!

Post # 36
69 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

hmmm broke an ex’s foreskin with my teeth when giving a blowjob ( really wasnt going at it hard, just pure accident my teeth happened to get in the way) i then had a willy gushing with blood (sorry if tmi) and him screaming hysterically, so I had to phone the doctor, the doc wouldnt talk to me ( after explaining the situation.. rather embarressingly) but wanted to talk to my ex, my ex wouldnt talk to the doc cos he was embaressed, and wanted me to do the talking but doc refused, so ex had to phone the doc back ( eventually.. as he kept bleeding) and after sorting the bloodloss ( running willy under cold water tap for 5 mins) my parents walked in just as we finished cleaning up… wud have been more embaressing if they hadda known what happened.

Post # 37
1523 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

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@AlbertaLolita:  Oh my god!  The same thing happened to me!


  • When DH and I first started dating we decided to have shower sex.  I am also really sensitive to heat and I noticed that I was having the familiar “about to pass out” sypmtoms.  However, I am an idiot and chose to ignore them.  Next thing I know, I am laying at the bottom of the tub, DH’s flacid penis flopping near my face, and him literally slapping me in the face and yelling my name.  Not only did I pass out, but I hit my head on the faucet on the way down and it was really hard to wake me up.

 Then, when I felt well enough to finish showering (I still had shampoo in my hair) I passed out AGAIN.  Luckily, he was prepared and caught me that time.


I have others, too Embarassed






  • Once, DH and I were feeling adventurous and decided to have sex outside on our lawn in the rain.  When we finished we were greeted with the clapping and hollering of our neighbors who watched the whole thing.






  • And one of my personal favorites, the time when DH accidentally came on our Golden Retriever’s face and our Pug licked it off.


 It is sad that I have so many of these!

Post # 38
484 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

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@RahlyRah:  Omg. Your last two had me rolling with laughter, especially the dog one. Animals can be so gross! That would have made me laugh for days if I’d seen it.

Post # 39
645 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

FYI guys- this one is pretty disgusting.


When the Fiance and I were just friends with benefits- we used to drink A LOT. One night we were at a bar next to my house, just completely plastered. I remember the Fiance puking as we walked across the parking lot on our way back home. I remember us hooking up that night (barely).

The next morning I wake up and just hungover as all get out. I’m on the verge of puking, totally dehydrated, pounding headache… and… My mouth is numb? What on earth? Like, distincly numb. So I’m contemplating this while I try not to puke.

Then I remember.

I had picked up some Monistat the day before because I felt an infection coming on. Apparently I must had thought the night before was a good night to do it, we hadn’t planned on gettin it on.

And he went down on me. 

Then I puked. 

Post # 41
4605 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Both of mine involve FH.

The first time I ever gave him a blowjob I got a cramp in my leg and kinda bit him. 

My second story happened about a month after we started dating and it was only the second time we’d ever had sex. I’d been off my period for about a week (or so I thought), but after we’d finished and turned the lights on, there was blood everywhere. I guess the act knocked some stuff loose. I was really embarassed because FH hadn’t been together long, I got his sheets (and him) bloody, we had to take the sheets to a laundromat because FH didn’t have a washer and then FH had to take me to the store to buy tampons. 

They aren’t super embarassing to me now, but they were at the time.

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