(Closed) happiness/sadness

posted 6 years ago in Elopement
Post # 4
Member
6124 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

I don’t think I will EVER understand why families would be hurt by not going to a wedding.  This is due to how I was raised.

I mean this is a very intimate moment in both of your lives, why put it on such public display?  It’s so personal I think.

I must have the world’s oddest family becasue everyone thinks of it as a FAVOR if I DON’T have a wedding for them to attend.  Why?  Well they save their precious vacation days, they save their hard earned money because they don’t have to even bat an eye at plane tickets, hotels, rental cars or wedding gifts.  They are all relieved of that. Now if we throw a party that’s a different story but there won’t be the obligation that is behind a wedding.

I was raised my whole life with my parents complaining about weddings and what  PITA they are for everyone else.  My parents made it clear that eloping his highly perferred. 

No you are not selfish.  In my eyes you did them a favor!

Having a party later is at very best a comprimise and I cannot believe that someone had the gall to tell you what you did wasn’t right.  You need to put on thicker skin and work on your “come backs” rather than crying and questioning every move your make.  Make yourself think it’s THEM that are wrong, not you. 

How about this one:  “Oh, since when did you know what is best for Fiance and I as a couple?  Should I consult you for all our intimate needs as well, since you know best?”

 

I’m pissed for you!

Post # 5
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Congratulations on your wedding! I am an eloping bride also. πŸ™‚

 Now, did I read your post correctly, that you told your parents ahead of time that you were going to elope and they gave you their blessing, but now after the fact they are saying you are selfish? I would confront them on that. I would remind them that they supported you beforehand. And I would tell them exactly WHY the stress of everyone having an opinion pushed you to your decision to elope. And I would tell them that you feel incredibly hurt and betrayed, and that you expect them not just to support you, but to stand up to your siblings and anyone else that’s giving you a hard time about this.

 

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