Post # 1
Follow up to my earlier post:
I had my 3 year anniversary dinner last night and while it was very lovely, there was no proposal. I realized that our timelines are off and while my SO did reassure me that he wants to be with me and he loves me and knows I want to be engaged, it’s just not going to be until he graduates and gets a job.
Anyway, as I feel that I have turned the corner about marriage (Meaning I am willing to wait until he’s ready and the time is right), I just changed my walk and/or target wedding date from 6/28/14 (which doesn’t make sense, even if the SO graduated in Dec we would be rushing the engagement) to 9/17/16, which would be our 6 year anniversary.
I didn’t see any posts about this, has anyone else done this? Thanks again for the support, bees!
Post # 3
- Wedding: July 2017 - Bristol zoo
I don’t full understand your poll (I’m probably just being dumb lol), but I think this is kind of what I’ve done?
Back in January I asked BF if he had thought about getting engaged (I was really embarrassed and he basically had to guess what I was asking lol), and he said yes and also that he had a plan. Cue me getting overexcited and interpreting that to mean that we’d probably be engaged by our 3rd anniversary and then married around our 4th.
I signed up for the bee late march and have spent the next 6 months realising that that really isn’t going to happen. It’s been kind of a disapointing year for me but at the same time I’ve realised that it doesn’t matter if things don’t work out 100% on my dream timeline, BF has things that he wants to work on and old scars that he needs to heal. I’m young enough and love him enough that I’m willing to wait a while, so my ‘ideal’ wedding date has now turned into the date from which I can start preparing for and potentially propose to him ^^
Post # 4
Yes, many many years ago when I first joined I thought I was going to marry my sons father. But he ended up being abusive/cheating/cray, so we broke up.
I took a long break and joined again when I was dating my current FI, when I was happy to read/comment on other peoples weddings again.
Post # 5
I didn’t start looking for wedding sites until I was planning a wedding. But we didn’t marry until a week after our 6th dating anniversary, so I had to readjust my timeline a couple times in there. 🙂
Post # 6
I actually moved my date up. I had a date in mind that I wanted us to get married by (our 10th anniversary), but once FI and I talked about getting married and he decided it was time, we moved the date up by a year. We didn’t want to wait nearly three years to get married, even if it would nicely fall on our 10th anniversary.
…so I didn’t vote in the poll because none of the options worked.
Post # 7
@MaidMarian: Yes you answered my question and thanks! Yes I’ve been hoping for a proposal and was very ready for it in January when I joined the bee. I’ve turned the corner and adjusted my expectations because of this site and just wondered if anyone else had the same feelings 🙂
Post # 8
Mmmmm I’m not sure if I’m answering your question correctly. “Walk” date is very odd phrase to use.
Originally my SO and I were going to be married May 2011 but due to us needing more time in college and wanting to be responsible, we postponed indefinitely. This May 2013 we settled on November 2013 and have been planning ever since. We wanted to have some savings and pay off most of our debt before we got married. So now we only have my SO’s student loans and have a sizeable savings for a future downpayment on a home/emergency fund. While these things aren’t mandatory, we felt we owed ourselves to be as responsible as possible so we could enter marriage in a positive place.
Post # 9
@veryberry13: Omg I’m sorry that my question isn’t clear. I really, REALLY want to be married. When I came here at first, it was because I was trying to discern if my BF is the “one” and so I made my original walk date to mean the day I would decide if I should stay or if i should literally walk out of the relationship. I’ve been feeling guilty and I was just wondering if I was alone in this or if I am a bad person for wanting to have a husband and a family so badly that I would be willing to leave a man who I love. Thanks again 🙂
Post # 10
@veryberry13: I don’t really understand the poll. I don’t think any of those apply to me, but I did extend my walk date. At first it was my birthday in August, but around the June time frame he had told me it would be before the end of the year. So I figured I could wait at least until the end of the year before I made any rash decisions. My birthday was almost exactly a month ago. He’s getting the ring tomorrow (even though he doesn’t know that I know). So I’m glad I extended my deadline. I don’t know when he’ll propose, but hopefully by his own timeline.
Post # 11
I had hoped to be engaged this summer and married next summer, but that didn’t happen. And financially, it probably would have been impossible to get married next summer anyway. Now, I know a proposal is coming this fall and we are planning to get married in either May or August of 2015. The dates changed a little bit, but it honestly is just the only thing that makes sense at this point.
I don’t have a walk date and I never did. Before I knew for sure that the proposal would happen this fall, though, I knew that if we weren’t engaged by the end of 2013 we would be having a serious, serious talk about the status of our relationship and our future.
Post # 12
I haven’t voted, because there’s no option for me to do so.
I edited my wedding date because shortly after I joined the bee SO told me he was thinking about October 2014, and I had registered with a date in 2018 (IDK why, but I knew that if we weren’t married by then, I would walk away).
Post # 13
Yup, I changed mine. Honestly I don’t even remember if my original date I signed up with was sooner or further away, it was just a random date I’d chosen to be a place holder. As soon as we talked about when we might want to get married, I changed it to something more realistic. Who knows, I may change it again once we get engaged and set an official date, but right now “fall 2015” is what we’re shooting for, so I changed my “wedding date” to reflect that. I do not have a walk date and have not even thought in those terms so changing that date isn’t a reflection of “working with” my SO or re-negotiating; when I had more information, I simply changed the date to be more accurate. I didn’t think it was a big deal and I suspect lots of other bees do the same without giving it much thought, which is why you probably don’t see many posts about it, but I’m guessing it happens a lot!
Post # 14
CHanged my wedding date – it was originally our 3 year anniversary but it fell on a Wednesday, so we decided on a Saturday about 3 and a half weeks earlier 🙂
Post # 15
@veryberry13: When I first came to the bee my date was the 23rd of May 2015. After being with SO for a little over two and a half years, he asked me if we could please get married in 2014. We both want to have children fairly young and SO has been really excited about getting married for quite some time now.
So at the moment our date is (hopefully) going to be the 13th of September 2014. We will know for sure what our date is once we book our venue, but we are hoping for September or October in 2014!
Post # 16
I thought we would be able to have a wedding in summer 2015, but it’s looking doubtful that will happen now. We’ll likely still get married in 2015, but wedding will be in 2016. Damn visa issues! International love is so complicated. That being said, if SO’s work visa doesn’t come through in December we’ll be getting married a LOT sooner! I really hate how up in the air everything is.