Post # 61
bywater : ya, that’s a nightmare! I’m sure that anyone with half a brain and a heart would be accommodating to your situation when planning their wedding. Mind you, I say that as someone who has a nephew with FPIES (so it’s second nature to ensure the ability to accommodate those with crazy specific diets)… I’m sure you do run into so many problems, even though the people in your life should have your back. I feel for you!
So many people on these boards seem to forget that vegans and veggies eat the way they do for moral/ethical reasons, so they aren’t going to buy a prime rib for Uncle Gerald just because he doesn’t want to “eat damn rabbit food” for a night. That’s the type of situation I’m referring you to. Not yours… yours is totally valid, and sounds just awful!
Post # 62
Go for it! My husband is veggie so I’m pretty used to eating vegetarian. I’d say to not make a big deal about it being a vegan menu and offer (at least some) foods that are not too out there.
Post # 63
bywater : Wow! That really does suck 🙁
We will of course have an area for dietary restrictions and will work around anything if needed however just thinking off the top of my head, I’m pretty sure the only allergy is my sister who has a dairy allergy. Other than that, we’ve lucked out that the vast majority of people we intend to invite do not have any allergies/restrictions.
Post # 64
beebee147 : my husband doesn’t eat any veggies besides corn and potatoes. No condiments. No salad. If anything looks like there is a chunk of a vegetable in it he won’t touch it. It is not the tase of vegetables for him, it is the texture. Everyone has a right to their moral/ethical thoughts, however when you invite people to a event sometimes you have to cater to the masses. We would and have declined invitations due to the menu. Spending 6-8 hours at an event where there is nothing you would eat is not very appealing.
Post # 65
I am thinking of having the invites say something like what a PP recommended which was:
 mushroom risotto
 butternut squash ravioli
 chickpea stew
Whomever I invite is welcome to decline should the menu not be up to their expectations/desires. As a vegetarian, I have never declined an invite to an event that was important to me due to the menu options. If there’s an edible veggie option, I will eat it regardless of whether it’s bland or not something I’d typically want to eat. If there are no veggie options, I have protein/nut bars and I’m sure bread or something to get me thru. It’s more important for me to be there for the experience and to celebrate with my loved ones.
I know my immediate family/very good friends would not decline so I’m not all that worried about it. I was worried more about his side of things however he already stated that he is a-ok with whoever declines on his side since the most important people will not decline. Even if it just ends up being me, him and only our immediate family, that’s more that enough for me. It’s more important to him that we remain true to who we are as a couple and I am 150% on board with that.
Post # 66
justanormalgal : wow, you would seriously decline to attend a loved one’s wedding if you think there’d be a vegetable mixed into the dish? :0 Wow.
Post # 67
I say go veggie. I wouldn’t expect my veggie friend to serve beef or pork etc. I myself have life threatening food allergies to nuts. I have a skin and stomach reaction to many fruits/veggies including avocado and some fruits. I always ask in advance to see if I can be accomodated. But if not I keep a foil with a sandwich in my purse.
So barring a health issue most people can suck it up and eat vegetarian for one meal. I don’t understsnd why people freak out. So annoying.
I’d just list the choices as (for example)
1. Pasta with marinara
2. Cheese stuffed ravioli
3. Quinoa salad with avocado
Or whatever. That was it’s not drawing attention to meatless. Then obviously if there’s an allergy you find out from the venue if they can accommodate that (don’t forget about cross contamination).
Post # 68
I just saw that you were planning to do that (list the choices ). Oops. I typed before I saw that
Post # 69
Go veggie, but please give your guests a chance to adjust their own plans/ meals according to the menu limitations. I love the way you’re thinking about wording the menu choices.
Nobody wants to be surprised that they can’t eat the food at a 6-8 hour event.
Post # 70
I think a vegetarian menu is fine. There are plenty of delicious vegetarian options. Vegan on the other hand would be a bit trickier in my opinion
Post # 71
justanormalgal : I know this is going to sound snarky, but I SWEAR it’s not meant to… I’m just genuinely curious how the heck he can survive only eating meat, grains and potatoes?! Does he eat fruit? When it comes to chronic physical health issues I can wrap my head around it because I assume the person is under the care of a physician and is taking loads of supplements. Is it the same thing when it comes to someone with sensory issues like your husband?
Post # 72
Girl! You can totally do a vegan reception, and no one would be the wiser, unless you want them to be! My daughter is getting “close” and I already have a secret Pinterest board for her future wedding, including several all-vegan menus & bamboo plates and cutlery. I LOVE that you want to express your values and personalities at YOUR wedding! No one is going to complain-if they do, it would be very poor manners. Last Thanksgiving, she and her Boyfriend or Best Friend came over for dinner, and while I was cooking, she said “mama, I don’t think I can eat anything here”…and we jumped in the car and made it to Whole Foods just in time to make her a stuffed squash, crudités with walnut cheese, brown rice casserole, etc…this Thanksgiving, I’m going to make it vegan and not say a word about it and just see if anyone even misses the turkey! My sweet girl even has a selection of vintage conflict-free diamond rings to choose from. Mwah to you!
Post # 73
beebee147 : My friend’s sister is having a vegan only wedding in LI. She is doing her catering through Cinnamon Snail! No idea on the costs, but given the popularity of Cinnamon Snail for vegans and nonvegans alike…def worth a look. 🙂
Post # 74
justanormalgal : “If anything looks like there is a chunk of a vegetable in it he won’t touch it. It is not the tase of vegetables for him, it is the texture…. when you invite people to a event sometimes you have to cater to the masses.”
Yeah, your husband does not represent the masses.
Post # 75
Short answer- yes, people do it all the time. I will be having a vegan menu, and a family member of mine also did.
I highly believe that what is the popular opinion on the weddingbee is NOT respresentative of what your friends and families opinion is, most likely. I have a family of traditional “meat eaters” and not one person complained when going to my sister entirely vegan wedding, and are open-minded.
She got destroyed on here when posting about her vegan menu. When she made a new post, just posting descriptions of the food and left out the word vegan, everyone loved her menu. People can be very close-minded when they don’t understand.
People do not understand what vegetarian and vegan food exists, and how so many food items are naturally vegetarian or vegan.
It also seems that the bee has a higher population of people with extreme food allergies and sensitivities then I feel a majority of do. Obviously it is important to put on invitiations a spot for people to list allergies though.
Don’t let the negative opinions of people on here influence your decision on what you serve at your wedding. You are paying for it, you shouldn’t have to pay for something that you are ethically against to please the masses.
Surely people have served non-vegetarian meals that are crappy, so I’m not sure why it automatically assumed that vegetarian/vegan=crap (or unfilling, unsatisfying, bland, etc.). Sure, I bet there are people who have served some horrible veg food, just like there are people who have served terrible non-veg food.
Have a happy wedding! 🙂