Has anyone ever witnessed a “… speak now, or forever hold your peace” moment?

posted 2 years ago in Beehive
Post # 31
Member
13 posts
Newbee

dreamreve1 :  We’re planning on writing our wedding ceremony as well (we’re not religious and also don’t like how unequal a lot of things in weddings are). I’d love to see what you guys wrote if you don’t mind sharing! You can message me if you’d prefer. Totatlly understand if you don’t want to share too. 

Post # 32
Member
6278 posts
Bee Keeper

As others have said it’s a legal part of weddings in the uk. Even if you just have a couple of witness at the registry office. And they take it very seriously. They will stop the wedding so you are clearly warned not to muck about.  

Post # 33
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Twizbe :  and is the key word there. I took anything like that out AND made the ceremony very equal. Nothing unequal about it; I just didn’t want it. Sorry if that wasn’t clear. Equal was an aside regarding the ceremony in its entirety. 

Post # 34
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

dixg22 :  sure! If you message me your email, I can email it over! 

Post # 35
Member
1777 posts
Buzzing bee

cosimaskye :  Oh my hubs friends would have done something too, there’d have been jokes of last chance to run are you sure you want to be stuck with him etc. It would be in fun and we’d have laughed, I’m not going to give them the chance lol.

Post # 36
Member
1209 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: January 2017

Well, I jokingly said, “Eh…sort of!” when asked whether I was entering the marriage of my own free will. He and I tease each other a lot, so it was pretty fitting to how we are together. 

Post # 37
Member
1777 posts
Buzzing bee

dixg22 :  This is me, I refused to include the words obey in our ceremony the first time. I’m not going to do it and not going to say I will. The pastor just took it out and we picked something different. 

Post # 38
Member
1017 posts
Bumble bee

I’ve heard this line once at a wedding. It wasn’t really treated like a legitmate question, more like obligated reading. As in, the didn’t pause afterward to give anyone a chance to actually chime up. They quickly and immediately went into the next part of the wedding so that if I had coughed or something, I probably would not have heard it, it was so quick. 

Post # 39
Member
2694 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

dreamreve1 :  there isn’t anything unequal in the marriage service. I was married in a Church of England service with their standard wording.

both of us promised ‘to have and to hold from this day forward’

both ‘forsaking all others remain faithful until death’

both ‘love, honour and protect’

Both ‘all that we are we give to the other and all that we have we share with the other’

both ‘with our bodies honour each other’

 

Post # 40
Member
1476 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2017

We took it out of the ceremony because we felt DH’s mother was a risk. Why even put that out there

Post # 41
Member
912 posts
Busy bee

Kind of, sort of…

My first wedding was during a thunderstorm. I kid you not – the minister says the line, we all pause, and *BAM* huge thunderclap.

The room erupted in laughter.

Perhaps it was an omen? laughing

 

 

Post # 42
Member
1884 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

It’s a legal requirement both in the UK and where I currently live. I’ve never seen any objections though! 

Post # 43
Member
1984 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2016 - Sussex, UK

CofE in the UK. I met my Darling Husband when I went to a wedding as his cousin’s plus one. Cousin told everyone at this wedding that I was his date as a joke and it kind of stuck as something people always laugh about. My cousin would make jokes on my Facebook pics of me and Darling Husband about me being the love of his life and how I was stolen from him. He’s 20 years older and a larger than life character so it’s not weird. 

Our vicar said the line and everyone looked at DH’s cousin who said “no, I’ve decided to give them my blessing.” Luckily our vicar was a good natured funny guy and said “anyone else? There’s no hurry.” I get that a lot of people would hate this but it was funny to us and gave everyone a good laugh.

Post # 44
Member
17 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2018 - KISS Love It Loud Chapel, Las Vegas, NV

My first marriage was at the JP’s office. Ex-hubby’s best friend was one of our witnesses. These guys are always clowning around, and best friend was telling my ex that there was still time to make a run for it. When the Justice of the Peace got to the “speak now, or forever hold your peace” part of the ceremony, he turned to the friend, pointed his finger and said, “You, keep your mouth shut.” We all got a big laugh out of it, but we’re all a bit crazy (and all still friends). 

Post # 45
Member
1710 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

Twizbe :  good for you? Glad it was equal for you. I have seen many weddings be very unequal and patriarchal, which wasn’t something I wanted at all. Perhaps the Church of England marriage ceremony isn’t unequal, that doesn’t go for all marriage ceremonies. 

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