Post # 1
So this happened during Christmas (I may have even mentioned it in passing on here), but I just can’t get over it. I don’t know if I’m being unreasonable or what, but just wanted to vent.
I’ve shown photos of my dress to friends, coworkers, family, acquaintances, etc. I wanted to show it to Future Mother-In-Law when I was at her house during Christmas (I had already shown it to other female relatives of his as well). She refused to look at the picture. Her reason was that she’s very critical and doesn’t want to hurt my feelings. I told her my feelings wouldn’t be hurt, but she still wouldn’t look.
I have NEVER heard of someone refusing to look at a photo of someone’s wedding dress. I mean, it takes like 2 seconds and you can say whatever you want. Is it so hard?
In general, she has made it clear that she’s not interested in the wedding, which is fine, but who REFUSES to see someone’s dress? It’s crazy. Like does she hate me so much that she couldn’t keep herself from insulting it?
Anyone have similar experiences? Is there anything I can do? Fiance did mention to her that it upset me, but she just reiterated that she just didn’t want to hurt my feelings and thus was doing nothing wrong.
Post # 3
My Future Mother-In-Law also refused to look at pictures of my wedding dress. She’s upset because we’re having a wedding on a smaller budget, and she thinks it’s selfish of me to spend money on a dress I’m only wearing once. She doesn’t even care that my parents were the ones who insisted on buying it for me, and really that it’s none of her business how they spend their money.
I was extremely hurt when all of this happened, but this isn’t the first time she’s upset me before. I’ve really just learned that we’re not going to get along because I am marrying her oldest son, and she has a lot of issues associated with that. Fiance also tried to explain to his mom why it upset me so much, and she just started crying and said “well think how I feel!” Wait, what? Yeah, so my approach now is just to be as polite as possible and avoid stepping on any toes. I don’t share things about the wedding unless she asks, and other than that, I realize the people whose opinions matter most to me are what’s important, not her bitter feelings about the wedding.
Just remember, it’s your dress, and you love it for a reason, she doesn’t need to validate it for you. To be honest, saying anything else (at least in my experience) will only make the situation worse. Just move on and try to enjoy the planning process and your wedding day!
Post # 4
that seems really strange! My Mother-In-Law asked to see a photo of my dress and then immediately “oh, I’m SO glad you aren’t wearing a strapless dress. that is getting so old”
I could laugh it off because I didn’t get a strapless, but I hope she wouldn’t have said anything negative if it was!
You picked out your dress because YOU love it! And you feel beautiful in it. I’m sure youre fiance will think the same and that’s the most important thing.
I’m sorry your Mother-In-Law just isn’t that into the wedding stuff, but maybe it’s for the best that she doesn’t see it beforehand. I’m sure when you’re wearing it on your wedding day, she’ll have nothing but compliments for the bride!
Post # 5
@Latte – ugh, my Future Mother-In-Law said “you’re not going to wear a strapless dress, right?” and I was like, “yes, I was planning on it,” and she looked so sad. Oh well! I’m happy!
@GirlWithARing – I think that’s weird, but I’d just shake it off. If she wants to act distant about it, that’s fine. Try not to let it ruin your day. 🙂
Post # 6
I think I’d be like that. Please don’t show it to me because I don’t want to insult you. I suck at faking “positive” emotions.
Don’t take it too seriously.