Post # 31
Your elopement sounds like so much fun! I’m sure your ceremonies and all of your parties will be perfect and anyone who says anything negative be damned! 😛 I did so much research on how to elope and feel like all of those pretty women on the courthouse steps made their decisions for reasons so much different than mine, so it helps that you’ve felt that way too.
It sounds like you’re a lot more level headed than I was two months ago when we got engaged. I fell head first down the wedding rabbit hole within days. Good luck with your elopement Bee, it sounds perfect 😀
I think we’ve come to a general decision on what we’re going to do. I think we’re going to have a small private ceremony somewhere near our home with immediate family who can make it in June. Then we’ll go on our honeymoon and have all summer to have visitors if anyone wants to come out to see us. We’ll have a party/bbq at a really cool lakeside forest service cabin or group campground at the end of September/ beginning of October and then go to see my family in PA during mid October (it’s usually really nice there that time of year) and have a casual party there. My only issue is that my mother keeps trying to grow our guest list, but we talked about it and I guess if she wants to chip in for extra people then cool. So, no concrete plans made yet, but this is the idea that’s held on the longest 🙂
Post # 32
Nice to hear you made a decision! That’s half the battle 😛 Sounds lovely, and sounds like it suits your needs perfectly. There is no right or wrong way to get married, and there’s nothing worse than doing something just because you think you have to do it that way. Happy planning 🙂
Post # 33
Historically elopements have been just that, no guests, or just maybe a friend each . The bride and groom ‘ran away ‘ for various reasons, usually because of parental/family disapproval . Kidnapping and rape, while not unknown, were more likely to be a problem in the case of orphaned heiresses etc .
Disparate fortunes were a common reason for disapproval or the bride being underage, hence the famous Gretna Green elopements of past centuries , Scotland having very relaxed rules back then about parental consent and age etc.
Now the term seems to have become (incorrectly) a synonym for “small private wedding” .
Post # 34
- Wedding: November 2016 - Garden
I wouldn’t consider it being ‘Elopement’ for us. We had a small ceremony before church started just two days ago. Glad I married the love of my life, but with certain circumstances, I do wish I waited just a bit longer. I bought this gorgeous dress that’s still sitting in storage. I just may plan a ceremony with me walking down the aisle in my dress. May not. It depends on where we’ll be in a year from now. 🙂
Post # 35
My Fiance and I eloped last year and a part of me regrets it – not the actual weekend itself. we didn’t tell a soul and had a wonderful romantic time just the two of us. It was the guilt afterwards that got to me having not told my family and lying to everyone for months. We tried to keep it a secret but because he’s in the military word got out and we ended up having to tell everyone.
It is great being married and we joke that we are at least working out our marital issues before we have the wedding, because after all the marriage is a lot more important than the wedding.
Saying that, part of me doesn’t “really” feel married, because we did it in such privacy- I am also very social and have a big family. I’m the first sibling to get married in my family.
We’re now trying to plan our “real” wedding for next year and having a disastrous time with planning and coordinating even our immediate family together at the same time (they are spread all over the globe). One positive is that I feel a lot less pressure to adhere to traditions for this celebration because we are already legally married.
So I think you should do what suits you- it sounds like you already may think you will regret an elopement because of your childhood dreams of being a bride. Everyone is different – I think you have lots of great ideas for coming to a compromise which will suit you, your fiance and your families. One option is having a small ceremony for your immediate family followed by a larger party for everyone. I know how hard it is with family spread all over the place!
I have never heard of people thinking that a post-ceremony party is only thrown for the presents! That is pretty funny! At the end of the day you’ll never keep everyone happy, I think it will be nice to include your immediate family, but the most important people are you and your Fiance, so do what will make you two the happiest! 🙂
Post # 36
Do a small traditional wedding. You sound like you would regret not having a wedding. You can’t go back once you’re already married and try to do the whole wedding thing (well you can but many think it’s tacky & gift grabby af. ). Of course there will be those who encourage to only please yourself, ignore etiquette,do what you want. The good news about following that advice is no matter what you do, you’re unlikely to have anything negative said to you. (That usually just goes on behind your back!) haha
Congrats on your engagement bee!