Post # 1
When I was doing online dating, I assumed that I was having no luck because of my disability (I am not functionally affected but still).
However I have been hearing from a lot of my healthy friends that they are having a tough time also – main complaint is men ghosting or not wanting to commit to having a relationship.
Was it better before the internet? What has changed from the days of dating with the purpose of finding a life partner?
Post # 2
Dating has always been challenging and will always be challenging. I think technology changed the nature of those challenges somewhat, but it’s not easy to find another human being who likes you enough to want you around always, return those feelings and have that bond endure. It’s actually a really tall order.
Post # 3
When you have thousands of people to choose from, it’s easy to start letting your manners slip. You’re only ghosting a total stranger so who really cares, right? And there are plenty of men and women who don’t want a real relationship. One night stands aren’t new since internet dating came along.
You might want to widen your net, which is the advice I give anyone who complains about the shortage of decent guys in their area. My husband turned out to live 3000 miles away from me. I’m pretty happy that I took a chance even though my life isn’t going as I’d planned when I was 20. I also suggest being as blunt as possible. Why waste time on a one-nighter if you aren’t into that? I was always very upfront about waiting until marriage, for example, and it filtered out a lot of wasted time. (Yeah I know 99.9% of the population doesn’t but you probably do have some major dealbreaker). I think I only went on about 4 dates and one boyfriend aside from my husband and while I didn’t click with any, none were duds either.
Post # 4
Dating has always been a numbers game. The expression “you have to kiss a lot of frogs” was as true pre-online dating as it is now. Where and how you approach is also important, of course. Have a trusted person look at your profile, join groups where you are more likely to meet appropriate people, and don’t be afraid to ask people if they know anyone.