(Closed) Has it become too much about the pictures??

posted 6 years ago in Photos/Videos
  • poll: Has it become too much about the pictures??
    Yes : (34 votes)
    50 %
    No : (34 votes)
    50 %
  • Post # 3
    2216 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    No, not if your photographers know what they are doing.  For example, I didn’t even know where my photographers were during the reception; they weren’t pulling me aside for pictures.  We did the traditional family portraits and bridal party shots in between the ceremony and the reception, because, I, myself, wanted to enjoy the party that I planned for almost 2 years.  In contrast, we were at a wedding where the bride and groom spent hours during the reception taking extended family pictures – in their case, yes, the photography took focus away (their photographer was somewhat inexperienced).

    Post # 4
    3078 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    There is a lot of emphasis on pictures, but I kind of buy into it.  I’m not going to remember every little detail and I like the idea of having pictures of it all to look back on.  We are doing a first look, but it’s to relieve my anxiety.  I’ve been having a really hard time planning my wedding without my mom around and the thought of the actual wedding day without her there makes me cry just thinking about it.  I could care less if there are pictures of it.

    Post # 5
    1314 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2006

    Photography and video are the two tangible records that you will be able to go back and look at for years after the wedding.  It’s the major regret people have about their weddings.

    Also first looks have more to do about timelines than anything, but some people do them because they can be more intimate moments than the seeing each other when walking down the aisle.  I’m not a traditional photographer by any means, so I can’t say I truly understand the desire to adhere to any specific tradition when it comes to weddings.  I’d say 50% of the weddings we shoot do first looks, but 95% of emotional moments captured by photos from the couple seeing each other for the first time come from first looks and not seeing each other down the aisle.  That’s something to think about!

    Post # 6
    883 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I wasn’t going to even have a photographer, and just hired one 4 weeks before the weddding.  I was more concerned with getting pictures of my 81 year old father and I, pictures of him and his children/grandchildren, my aunts and uncles (who are all in their late 70’s and early 80’s).

    I think overall, we’ve become picture crazy for everything, because digitial makes it so much easier – when you had to have film developed, you thought twice because it could be expensive – the only time in those days that I was picture crazy was when I worked for a film/processing machine manufacturer and my film and developing were free!


    Post # 7
    78 posts
    Worker bee

    This is so interesting! I think it goes both ways. My SO was in a wedding a few weeks ago and they spent 4.5 hours between ceremony and reception taking photos at different locations because “it’s all we’ll have of the big day.” Well, IMO, it’s pretty sad if thats all you can take away from a wedding… But at the same time you DO want/ need certain photos with different groups, people, and moments to be taken. Honestly, I don’t have a real opinion, for some people, at some moments the photos can trump the wedding.

    Post # 8
    1093 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    I don’t know if it takes away from the sancitity of the day, we could make a list. I think it depends on the couple and it’s a personal choice. I’m with you on not wanting a first look photo shoot… I loved that my husband cried when he saw me. I think a lot of brides have this one day and feel the pressure to get as many shots as possible. Our photographer took hundreds of pics but only 50% came out good and 25% of those are awesome. The more pictures taken the better chance to get good shots.

    Even though it’s been almost a year my husband and I want to do some “staged” pictures. I  still have my wedding dress and he got a free suit from Mens Wearhouse from the 5 tuxes we rented. San Diego has some beautiful backdrops and plus it would give me a chance to wear my purdy dress again!!!!

    Post # 9
    2712 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    Yes and no.  From what I’ve gathered, your wedding day is a blur and you are going to want someone to capture all the moments so you’ll remember them.  However, when brides start complaining that a Bridesmaid or Best Man died her hair purple or one didn’t get the right shoes or a Groomsmen didn’t shave or someone got a tattoo and that those things are going to ruin their pictures, then I think it’s gone too far.

    Post # 10
    2697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    I voted no. The moments where it was just me, my husband, and our photographers were the most intimate, special, memorable, and favorite moments from the wedding day (aside from the actual ceremony.)

    Post # 11
    1252 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    @sn2bmrsmntgmry:  The groom not seeing the bride before the ceremony has nothing to do with the “sanctity of the day”, and my wedding was no less sacred because we decided not to honor a tradition that originated when weddings were arranged and the first time the couple MET was at the alter… 

    For the record, we did a first look so we could spend as much time as possible with our guests, celebrating our wedding, rather than taking portraits during it.  More and better pictures were certainly a benefit since it was dark by the time our ceremony ended, however, our motivation was purely to be able to enjoy every possible second of our wedding and to give our guests as much of our time as we could.  I don’t think there is any way that can “take away” from the day, only add to it.

    ETA And I agree with PP, there was nothing “lost” by seeing each other earlier, I still saw the look on his face when he first saw me, we still cried, and it was more intimate since it wasn’t in front of 150 people and a pastor. 

    Post # 12
    1856 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: March 2013

    I’m not having a (pro) photographer and that’s great for me. I don’t care what others do, but one thing that drives me wild is when people say “But it’s the only thing you’ll have after the wedding is over!” Uh, no. I plan on keeping my husband for the memories 😉

    I think in general, people have gone picture crazy. A few years ago, I found myself realising that I was spending so much time taking pictures of my daughter and of my travels that I wasn’t living in the moment. Do I like having a couple shots of my beautiful little girl given that she’ll never be just this age again? Of course. And I love having pictures of places I’ve been. But I love the feelings from those moments better.

    Post # 13
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee

    I think the marketing and hype surrounding wedding photography has gotten a bit out of control. I’m all for having some nice pictures, but I do feel like wedding photography (along with other aspects of wedding-related industries) has pushed the envelope quite a bit in terms of trying to raise people’s expectations (and the threshold of what is considered “reasonable” to spend) re. wedding photography.

    I apologize in advance for the length of this, which is cut-and-pasted from another thread that was talking about wedding photography, but I feel like all the focus on getting artsy detail shots, etc., risks detracting from more important aspects of the wedding (including the sanctity, the people, etc.) The photography doesn’t have to be that way, but in the constant search for innovation, the next trendy thing, being cutting-edge, etc., it often happens. The first line below, in italics, is quoted from a previous poster’s comment on the other thread, in response to an earlier comment of mine about wanting shots of people and not wanting detail shots of the material trappings of the wedding, i.e. the dress on a hanger, the shoes, the place settings & centerpieces, etc.:

    The detail shots work great for building an album telling the story of your day, the story that will be passed to future generations.

    Plus, when I hear a line like this, I feel like I’m being marketed to. I’m not interested in passing along “the story of our day” to future generations – I care more about passing along the story of our marriage. For us, that’s made up of the coming together of our families and the role that they and our friends have played in our lives. And, to the extent that the “story of our day” is part of the story of our marriage, I want that chapter of the story to focus on the people who came to celebrate with us and the interactions we had with them, not the trappings.

    Someday, when we’re sitting with our future children on our laps and looking at our wedding album (which, honestly, I expect will happen only rarely), I don’t want to convey to them that weddings are about ooh-ing and aah-ing over the shoes or the headpiece, or painstakingly applying makeup. I want to look through it with them and point out, “there are your grandparents, and there are your aunties and your uncle … Uncle X and Auntie Y weren’t married yet, they had just gotten engaged … and there’s your cousin Z, she was so little when she was our flower girl … ” and point out to them the relatives that may have passed on, or the ones they may not have had a chance to meet yet …

    So, yeah. I get that a lot of other people put a ton of work into the place settings and centerpieces, or whatever. And, since they did put that work in, it makes sense that they would want a picture. I will probably want a picture of the 2-3 DIY projects I’ll have put in by the end. But – the table setting is not my priority. Plates are just plates, shoes are just shoes, and I don’t really want to spend money on pictures of them. Nor do I want pictures to document what we had a florist or a decorator or coordinator do with centerpieces, etc., if we were going that route. In other words, if the story is “I put a lot of effort into making these!”, that’s a little bit more worth telling, in my mind, than “we spent a lot of money on these!” So maybe our album won’t be a work of High Wedding Art. I’m very okay with that.

    So *getting off soapbox* not trying to be smug or holier-than-thou, and I apologize if I veered toward that just now. But I do get really tired of being fed all those buzzwords and wedding rhetoric that ultimately boils down to a sales pitch for something I’m not interested in buying.

    Post # 14
    1769 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I think it has a little bit. Mostly in relation with the First Look. I don’t htink that’s necessarily a bad thing, but….people have a first look so they can get more pictures. Okay, maybe it will calm your nerves a bit, but the reason photographers like them is because it allows more time for pictures and a less rushed portrait session. That is why brides like it as well. I didn’t even really realize that until I was asking Fiance if he wanted to do a First Look. He asked what that was…I explained, and he said “so….why would we do that just for more pictures?”. I didn’t have a good enough answer, and ceremony/reception gaps are super common around here, so we’re just having a gap and not doing a first look. At the end of the day, our wedding is about us proclaiming our love and swearing ourselves to each other forever, not about the pictures. The pictures are just a bonus.

    Post # 15
    5075 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’m all about pictures.  To me there’s no such thing as too many.   It’s not very often that all your friends and family members are in one place.

    I’d rather look back and say “yikes, why do we have 100 pics of such & such” than “wow, I wish we had some pics of such & such”  

    Post # 16
    7311 posts
    Busy Beekeeper
    • Wedding: October 2011 - Bed & Breakfast

    I am a bit confused by your premise. How could photography possibly take away from the sanctity of the day? I have gorgeous photos documenting my day, but the presence of my photographer, the thought that went into selecting her/making the shot list/etc. in no way detracted from how I felt that day. I was fully engaged in marrying my best friend and celebrating with our favorite people. And I have the pictures to prove it. 😉

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