(Closed) Has your FI seen you at your worst?

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
  • poll: So has your fiance seen you at your worst?
    Yes - and he was wonderful : (201 votes)
    83 %
    Yes - well he was ok : (30 votes)
    12 %
    Yes - did not go well : (1 votes)
    0 %
    Nope - not gonna happen : (0 votes)
    I am a future stepford wife and have no intention of him ever seeing me less than perfect : (0 votes)
    Never had the chance but I am sure he would be great : (9 votes)
    4 %
    other : (1 votes)
    0 %
  • Post # 3
    999 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: March 2012

    oh yes, two years ago a virus infection or flu hit me hard, doctors didnt’ know what it was. I was sick for 2 weeks, really sick. Counldnt’ get out bed, a mess, given 2 rounds of antibiotics. I was at my worst. My fiance stood by my side taking care of me the whole time. I never felt ugly around him, he’s my Boyfriend or Best Friend.

    We gotta love our men! FEEL BETTER unixfairy

    Post # 4
    410 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: December 2016

    Aww that is so adorable! I hope you both feel better and get wel!! =( My Fiance too took care of me at my worst and Ill never forget him spoon feeding me my fav soup <3 love is nice

    Post # 5
    2542 posts
    Sugar bee

    Oh yes. Actually, the moment I knew I loved him at the beginning of our relationship was when I fell down the stairs at his apartment building and sprained my ankle. I was crying and freaking out and he just held me and took care of me until I felt better.

    We live together now so he has seen me in all states. Including when I had a horrible flu where I could not keep any food down and was sick to my stomach for like three days.

    He always takes good care of me – tucks me into bed, gets me water/soup/whatever I need, etc. 

    Post # 6
    4803 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2011

    Yes, and how he handled it – well, it depends on what kind of worst we are talking about, emotionally or physically. Although I guess with both he used to be okay but is now excellent.

    Physically, yes he actually had to leave work and drive me to the emergency room about a week ago. I am rarely sick and had never even been to the ER before, so it scared the crap out of him to have me call him sobbing asking him to come home and take me to the ER. But he did immediately leave work (not easy to do in a busy family-run small business) and took me. He used to not be aso great about me being sick because he always justs wants to be left alone if he is ill, but has finally learned I’m not like that and has been great these last few days.

    Emotionally…I’m gonna go personal here but I was sexually abused throughout my childhood, and sometimes still have flashbacks that are incredibly vivid and horrible, and when they do happen it’s triggered by sexual stuff between us – not great when you’re in the middle of stuff and one person freezes and/or bursts into tears. He used to just leave me alone because at first I’ll push him away, but now (though it happens much less) he knows to stay and after the initial scare to hold me and help calm me down.

    Post # 7
    826 posts
    Busy bee

    Yup.  One incident that sticks out was when I came down with a sinus infection while sleeping over at his house (I thought my allergies were just acting up, but by bedtime I had a fever…couldn’t go home because it was snowing).  He rented Alice in Wonderland on his XBOX 360 (I like to watch Disney when I’m sick lol) and stayed in bed with me until I fell asleep.  Later that night, I got up to use the bathroom and after I left, I wandered out into the living room where he was playing video games instead of returning to bed (I was feverish and loopy, apparently lol).  He asked me “what are you doing out here?” and in my loopy state, all I managed to do was smile at him…so then he was like “okay, let’s put you back” and he tucked me back into bed lol.  

    Post # 8
    466 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    After living together for 6 years he sure has! We are pretty comfortable with each other and I have never felt uncomfortable, not matter what the situation.

    He has seen me sitting over the toilet whilst bent over the shower with it coming out both ends (bad tofu!). He has seen me looking like death warmed with a serious chest infection, he has even seen a blood clot come out of me (TMI sorry! He walked in when I was in the shower).

    I have seen him at his worst as well! He ate bad ricotta and I saw him sitting in the shower with it coming out both ends, I have seen his body covered in eczema and I have seen him sob his heart out.

    Its part of being in a relationship

    Post # 9
    5269 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2016

    2.5 months into dating so Nov 2004(wk of turkey day) while we both were in the Navy I had my tonsils taken out and he took care of me:)  He has been wonderful! We have a daughter together too so he has seen me def.at my worst!  Not the labor part bc that was easy! It was the sickness during and after allll the labor!

    Post # 10
    2195 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: November 2011

    When we met I was eyeballs deep in bulimia. He stood by me through the cycle of recovery and relapse several times. I’d say, yeah, he’s seen me at my worst.

    Post # 11
    7587 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2010

    I think I was at my worse after miscarrying. I was mentally a mess and lashed out at everyone. He stood by me, was understanding, and helped me get through it. Even though it meant he ended up supressing his emotions at the time, which then made him blow up later.

    Post # 12
    2731 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: March 2014

    Yep. He’s always been wonderful about me not being so wonderful. He sees me on a regular basis looking like a big ol’ hot mess with no makeup (or day-old makeup), hair in a messy bun, pajamas, but he still looks me in my face and tells me I’m beautiful. He’s seen me sick, coughing, sneezing, near-vomiting.

    And emotionally, yeah, he’s seen that too. I think he gets perplexed when I get really emotional, but he’s always there and doesn’t make me feel like an idiot for it.

    Post # 13
    187 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: May 2012

    Yes, only about ever other day or so 😉

    Post # 14
    573 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: June 2014

    I have never been really sick since we started dating 6.5 years ago. I have had colds, but never any kind of flu or anything worse than a cold or losing my voice. (I hope this didn’t jinx it!). So he has never seen me like that. He has seen me get totally hammered and spend the night over the toilet throwing up and crying that I will never drink again and he was always fabulous in those situations. Once when I fell asleep on the bathroom floor he slept in a chair in the hallway in case I woke up and needed him, so cute.

    I let him see me with no make-up, hair a mess and in sweats everyday haha. As soon as I get home from the gym on week days I make no effort, and he still tells me I am beautiful.

    Post # 15
    6339 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: August 2014

    I don’t really know what to vote.. My OH has seen me realy ill twice: the first time was because of my endo, I was in so much pain I was delirious and vomitting, and he didn’t know what to do; I think it really scared him. I didn’t really need any help with anything (no-one can really help when you’re in that much pain), so I asked him to leave me alone :-s

    The second time was a severe allergic reaction to Quorn, where basically I was vomitting every 10 minutes. He was holding my hair back, and rubbing my back etc, but in the end I told him to try to get some sleep because he had work early the next day, so he did.

    So I don’t know how to vote really; the first time wasn’t really his fault, because it must have been a big shock and quite scary to see someone in so much pain. And the second he was helpful, but I wasn’t going to die so didn’t really need help.

    Emotionally though he’s been amazing; I was going through a really bad time due to an abusive ex when we got together, and he was fantastic 🙂

    Post # 16
    2697 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: June 2012

    Damn. I answered the poll before I read the post, and I thought this meant emotionally. LOL.

    Emotionally, I think he did ok–poor boy wanted to be supportive but didnt know what to do.

    Yes, he’s definitely seen me at my physical worst…he does not seem to mind one bit, and besides when I have cream on my face to go to bed, usually thinks I’m pretty cute.


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