(Closed) Hating planning my wedding. How to get happy again?

posted 5 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
47445 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

View original reply
minimalistbee:  Don’t answer the phone. Screen your calls. Practice saying “Thanks for your inout/suggestion. Fiance and i will take it into consideration.”

Make a conscious choice to not let people push your buttons.

Post # 3
Member
1810 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

Remember that this day is for you and your fiance. Stick to what you want. Deep breath, if only 2 people show up then only two people show up. As long as at the end of the day you are married to your fiance then the day is a success!

Post # 4
Member
5778 posts
Bee Keeper

If you are literally getting ulcers over planning/ family drama etc and the wedding has become a source of stress rather than joy, my first reaction would be to say ‘go with yours & FI’s initial option of eloping- BUT you say several people have already booked their flight, so this may not be something you feel you can still cancel. Soooo, the other option is for you and FI- as a united team, he has to step into the fray on this one, not leave it all up to you!- to put your foot down firmly and let it be known to all the wedding guests/ frequent callers etc that- no if ands or buts-  “We are planning an intimate wedding and we would love you to be there to celebrate with us, HOWEVER please understand that we really truly don’t want this to become a source of stress or friction for us or for anyone else. If you are planning to attend, you are most welcome. If you cannot attend we understand and your presence will be missed. Please understand that, while we appreciate offers of help and suggestions, we have already planned our celebration in a way that is meaningful to us and within our budget.” Then let the phone go to voicemail, snuggle up with Fiance, and enjoy simply being together or watching DVDs etc- this is your celebration, not their platform for drama.

Post # 5
Member
1444 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

I cope by saying “thanks for that suggestion” when I am being polite, “I love that idea!!!” when someone gives a great suggestion, and “we’re not doing that (straight face)” when someone has been pushing too hard. Hugs to you, bee! It will be great! 

Post # 6
Member
142 posts
Blushing bee

Sending virtual hugs your way. I’m dealing with the same issues right now and it’s emotionally exhaustiing and I understand.  This one wants this and that one wants that…the endless calls and booking of appointments and the money oh boy the money.  I know some girls enjoy planning, but I don’t, not in the least.  Maybe I will feel differently later, but right now I just want it all over with.

Post # 7
Member
7892 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

Wedding planning can be so stressful, especially when other people make things more complicated for you. Just remember that the most important part is that you get to marry your Fiance, and the other stuff just doesn’t matter that much. 

Post # 8
Member
9520 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

Can the two of you get away for the weekend and refresh? People suck. Especially when it’s family during a high stress time. Maybe changing the scenery a little and having time so you can focus on each other can help get you on the same page, remind you of the excitement of marrying each other and just be over all relaxing.

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