(Closed) Have I made a cake faux pas?

posted 4 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Should I have given a gift?

    Yes

    No

    Maybe

  • Post # 2
    Member
    831 posts
    Busy bee

    If you didn’t charge her for the cake then no.

    I would have told her in no uncertain terms that “I’d be delighted to make your cake as your wedding gift, friend”.

     Tbh I can’t believe some people are this fucking brazen and rude. 

    Post # 4
    Member
    2778 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2016

     I’d simply say what you are..”friend, I made your wedding cake with four tiers, fruit cake, royal icing, flower cascade etc..that took roughly x amount of labor and x amount of cost as a gift to you and your partner. You did not miss our gift.”

    Post # 6
    Member
    2778 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: November 2016

     

    View original reply
    beebay :  Yeah, it was definitely rude of her. So, just be matter of fact and don’t worry about stepping on her toes. She already stepped on yours. If she comes back tries to play it off like “oh i was just worried it was lost, that’s cool”…then just say “Glad we got it clarified.”.

    Post # 7
    Member
    831 posts
    Busy bee

    View original reply
    beebay :  now it depends what kind of relationship you have with her as to your response.

    “Haha come on now friend, you know we agreed that was your gift! We really hope you liked it as it was a labour of love”

    Or

    “Oh I definitely remember mutually agreeing to make the cake as your gift, sorry I should have made this clearer” 

    Or

    “You ungrateful, gift grabbing bitch- what a cheek! I hope the cake  settles all on your fat arse”

     

    Post # 8
    Member
    3862 posts
    Honey bee

    “You ate your gift.”

    Post # 9
    Member
    3862 posts
    Honey bee

    Or: “Oh such an oversight by me! I also forgot to send you the bill for the cake I made!  I’ll send both right away!”

    Post # 10
    Member
    65 posts
    Worker bee

    “It would have been difficult to place such a large gift with my card, so I left it on your cake table. Four tiers, cascading flowers… does that ring a bell? I am sure you’ll remember when you flip through your cake cutting photos”. You send that message through the same group chat, then delete her off fb and walk triunfant towards the sunset.

    Seriously though, your friend is entitled and ungrateful. Who needs friends like that.

    Post # 12
    Member
    65 posts
    Worker bee

    View original reply
    katebluestone :  Genious!

    Yes! Send the $1,200 bill for the cake and $100 for the gift, I love this

    Post # 13
    Member
    239 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: April 2016

    Wow no, your friend made the faux pas. So rude! Like the other posters, I would say something along the lines of “I remember discussing and agreeing that the cake would be your gift. I put a lot of time, energy, and money into it, and I really hope you liked it!” 

    At first I thought you should respond in a private message, but now I say respond to the group message to call her ass out! 

    Post # 15
    Member
    10286 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: June 2015

    You didn’t make a cake faux pas; she made a gift faux pas times two.

    first she forgets about the gift you gave her, so I’m assuming you didn’t get a thank you card. 

    Then she not only asks you where you gift is, but does do in group chat.

    message: she is rude, ungrateful, and obnoxious.

    write back in group chat: “this explains why we haven’t received a thank you card yet from you for the $xx and xx time cake which we established was your gift when you asked me to make it. Just figured you had no manners, thanks for confirming. “

     

     

     

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