Post # 47
I’m not married yet but I’ve had a bunch of snarky comments about my engagement. FH and I decided to get married earlier in the year but didn’t do the official down-on-one-knee-with-a-ring-type proposal. We decided to get married and BOTH started planning the wedding together. He has an ideal proposal in mind when he gets the ring but we both know we want to get married next year so we decided to go for it before we move out of state. We’ve told our families and several close friends, but when word gets out to those who aren’t close to us they tend to rain on my parade. I’ve had comments like, "Oh, so you’re not really engaged?" "You’re doing it backwards." "So you’re planning a wedding without a ring, that’s stupid." I’ve actually gone off on a soap box with some of these comments. The ring is just a symbol of the promises and committment you have made to each other, without those things it’s just a ring. We have the promises and committment, we just don’t have the symbol to represent that.
I just try to remember that most of those people don’t know us and aren’t invited to the wedding anyway. 🙂 I try not to let it get to me too much, the important thing is that we’re getting married!
Post # 48
Chantellamus, I can relate to a lot of what you said… Sigh. Also, I had a family member tell me how awful my dj was because he played an inappropriate song. I was appalled. I later figured out (via my wedding video) that he infact played a song that was fine. She (and another family member, a teacher) just misinterpretted the song (based on "revised" lyrics some school kids use…) But it still bothered me. Especially since at the point I figured this out and explained it to her, she didn’t seem to care. She just raved about the dj another family member used.
I have the feeling that this sort of snarky behavior can be attributed to the same freaky wedding jealousy and funk that get brides and Bms, and parents all worked up. It’s like people have to say somehthing bad about your wedding to make them feel better about their own, wheter they are still planning or already had one. Or if they aren’t even close to getting married, they’re probably trying to bring down your happiness in general.
Post # 49
I also think some people forget about how personally brides and groom will take some of their reviews. When people criticize one of your vendors, for example, they don’t realize you probably took a lot of care to pick that person over several others, and that it might make you feel bad that they didn’t like it. They think they’re just "analyzing" when actually they’re ALSO being insensitive.
Post # 50
wow people say bad things because they are tactless and jealous
I just brush it off, it used to be hurtful now I dont care