(Closed) Have you encountered any jealous family after you tied the knot?

posted 7 years ago in Family
Post # 4
Member
5654 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2011

I wish I had some good advice but I’m kinda in the same boat…

Here’s my situation and how we’ve best dealt with it:

Darling Husband mother has been like your Brother-In-Law the entirity of our relationship and still continues since we tied the knot. It’s been close to 2 years

We’ve haven’t found a way to really resolve the issue though b/c well we can’t control her and as of now she prefers to see herself as the victim and continues to act ugly & passive aggressive when we’re around or when Darling Husband talks to her.

All we’ve been able do to is change the way it affects us… as we know that we aren’t secluding ourselve or totally cutting off ties (as I’m sure ya’ll are either) and we just brush off whatever is said and continue on the next time we see/talk to her almost as if nothing has happened.

I’m not talking about denial.. but considering the fact that her and Darling Husband have talked COUNTLESS times about it and her and I have talked.. even me apologizing for causing her any issues and anytime I’ve made her feel unwelcomed.. as well she still continues *sigh*

I hope that your Darling Husband And Brother-In-Law can talk it out and that maybe just him affirming the relationship as something that’s important to him and dear to him will be enough.

*hope it gets worked out*

Post # 6
Member
4755 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

This is pretty common. Since you have no siblings you don’t know what it is like to lose one. Despite your claims he has lost his brother. It is no longer his bro and him… it is now his bro YOU and THEN him… and it hurts him. Does it justify his behaviour? No, but that’s how he feels and it isn’t going to change.

Now to improve the situation. Get a backbone. Next time he suspects your lying say listen buddy, I am not lying we have stuff to do believe me or don’t. I’m not keeping brother away, I want you to hang out and you can, but tonight we’re busy. If you want to hang out you’re going to have to give us some notice and make plans.

After that, I suppose you just have to let them to hang out on a semi regular basis.

Post # 7
Member
347 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

@west.coast.blonde I think your best bet is to talk to Fiance about this. It would be best if he has a talk with his brother so that everyone is on the same page and you are no longer being seen as the one who is taking him away. Your Fiance can rationally explain to his brother that he loves you and that their relationship will stay the same, just a little different. I dont think you should get involved. The brother is looking for some one to blame. Dont give him more ammo.

 

GL!

 

 

Post # 8
Member
274 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

My goodness.  Sorry I can’t relate, but your Brother-In-Law sounds immature.  Has your Darling Husband talked to his brother and family?  I hope he is defending you and calling them on their madness.  

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