- 5 years ago
- Wedding: July 2013
Hi bees! I’m having a bit of a career crisis and wanted to know your thoughts.
I went to a great college and studied graphic design. once I was done with college I knew I didn’t want to go into business for myself because clients are the worst. I ended up getting a job through a friend selling digital advertising at a very corporate place. I didn’t know much about it and I learned a TON on the job. the industry is very interesting and it was a great experience– they worked me long and hard for very little money, but it was still a very rewarding first job out of college. After a year, I was “poached” by someone who used to work with me at the first job to work at a much smaller (not corporate) environment. This job was great! More money, more relaxed, great people….only I didn’t learn anything for 2 years. I started to feel like my brain was rotting. So I looked for a new challenge. I went on a billion job interviews and got 2 offers: one for a lot more money at a company I didn’t know much about but seemed okay, and slightly less money (less than the other place but more than i was currently making) but at a company I was PSYCHED to be accepted by. I took the smaller offer.
I love the company I work for. When I started, I had 3 years of experience under my belt, I felt like after a small adjustment period I would assimilate nicely. WRONG. I will say this; my company is very forward thinking, very up and coming, one of the “companies to watch”…. I LOVE what my company is about. The problem is the processes they have in place are so anal retentive it’s actually crippling to work there. I am a pretty intelligent person (not the brightest but I am definitely no slouch) and I constantly feel like I forget things and make mistakes…just feel stupid all the time. Some of the processes that are set up have so many nitpickety rules its hard to remember them all! My boss told me to make lists to remind myself…but I have a TON of lists! And I still occasionally mess up.
anyway, it’s been six months and I was just starting to feel like I was getting the hang of things and we have our annual review. Everyone gets reviewed at the same time, regardless of when they were hired. This company is pretty buttoned up, they have us fill out this self evaluation sheet and then we have discussions with our boss. I expected to have a pretty positive review– some things to work on but overall, Good job.
WRONG AGAIN. My boss (who is usually pretty cool with me) practically ripped me to shreds. She spent 5 minutes telling me I was great at creating a great work environment, fun and social and enthusiastic. (I am a bit of a social butterfly, I enjoy relationships with people more than I enjoy punching numbers in excel…but who doesn’t?!) she then spent 40 minutes telling one that I don’t have enough attention to detail. I have NEVER been told that in my professional life. In fact, I was always one of the “good ones”! I work like a dog for this company…I left a job where I came in at 10, left at 5:30, and did very little during the day…to come work until 7 or later every night, constantly taking work home with with me, and working on the weekends. I have been putting forth so much effort and to hear that it’s not good enough was the worst thung to hear. My boss (who is 3 years older than me) ACTUALLY SAID “I was trying to think up jobs where you dontneed attention to details…like jobs I’ve had…and yeah, even a waitress needs attention to detail.” Did you just say I wouldn’t make a good WAITRESS!? She even asked me if I was okay and said she knew that this is hard for me to hear. (BTW we have weekly one on one meetings and this is the first I’ve heard this)
i left the review (which was a breakfast meeting I felt like throwing up during the entire time) and once the shock and sting wore off I started thinking: what if I’m just not well suited to this? (Never mind the fact that this is the first complaint I’ve had from a employer in 3.5 years…or pretty much ever if you include my 6 years at Starbucks through high school and college) I’m getting married in October, I should be happy! Instead I’m worked so hard and except for the fact I feel like I accomplish a lot, I’m apparently just not good at the technical part. So I’m thinking, if its just a job, and it’s not terribly important to me WHAT I do, so long as I feel like I’m contributing and productive, and good at my job…
should I just become an administrative assistant or executive assistant?
It can pay about the same (sometimes more) as I’m making now (base, without bonuses) sometimes more if I work at something like a hedge fund, and if I work in some hedge fund place, they give you bonuses anyway. And Im positive I can organize an office and book conference rooms, make travel arrangements, etc. Also, Fiance and I want to move away from the city ago raise kids…we don’t know where but everywhere is game. We often worry if we can get jobs with our expertise (he is in online advertising as well) but this way, if I have admin asst experience, I can work ANYWHERE.
is this a cop-out? Ann I being a huge baby? Am I making the right decision? Since I decided I wanted to do this, I’ve been so much happier 🙂