(Closed) Have you ever cheated? Have you ever been unfaithful?

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
  • poll: Have you ever cheated? With any of the following: boyfriend, fiance, husband, SO?

    No, Never.

    Yes, but in a previous relationship.

    Yes, in a current relationship. ( not yet married )

    Yes, in a marriage.

  • Post # 47
    Member
    1437 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: July 2012

    I have never cheated. & I never will!!

    But I have been that girl the guy cheated on with. I felt bad about it.

    Post # 48
    Member
    873 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I cheated on my ex various times and he also cheated on me various times. I honestly don’t know why we stayed together so long (11 years). Long story short, I just think that we really got along so well and were so comfortable with eachother that we didn’t want that part to change. At the end of the relationship, I realized that we were best friends and had more of a brother/sister relationship than a romantic one. We didn’t have sex (with eachother at least) during all of the last year we were together. 

    Also, I can honestly say that I NEVER felt bad about cheating on him. I don’t know why. I knew it was wrong, but I just never felt guilty.Also, I always knew that I would never marry him so maybe that was a part of it.

    However, with Fi, I would NEVER cheat on him. I can’t even cheat on him in my dreams! I’ve had dreams in which the oppprtunity presented itself for me to “cheat” on Fi and not even then would I do it. The thought of being with another man simply disgusts me. I can’t imagine having a better sexual or sexually emotional connection with anyone other than him. He is who I was looking for and the only one I will ever be with again. period.

    Post # 49
    Member
    7976 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: July 2013 - UK

    I’m amazed how many people said they cheated! I never have, and have never been tempted, either. To clarify: I have never kissed, inappropriately touched, or initiated any sort of inappropriate contact of any nature with someone whilst in a relationship with someone else. I’d like to think I’d walk away long before this would ever be an issue, but what do I know? Still young and stupid, right?

    … still amazed by how many people have cheated though!

    Post # 51
    Member
    4410 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2010 - Savannah, GA

    Yes.  I cheated on my ex-husband.  However, I did it after I had decided the marriage was over and had decided to divorce him.  I never cheated when I was committed to the relationship and the marriage.  So, I don’t know if that really counts as cheating, since I was divorcing him… This was a case where I had already emotionally divorced myself from the relationship and marriage. I would have never cheated on him if I had thought there was any chance for the relationship. 

    Post # 52
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - ceremony at a gazebo outside, reception at neighboring restaurant on a lake

    I have never cheated and never will.  I would be lying if I said that I didn’t find other guys attractive either emotionally or physically, but I would never act on it. 

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    @plzhalp:  I consider
    View original reply
    throughthebarricades story cheating.  When I say I haven’t cheated, I mean that I haven’t kissed or gone further or gotten emotionally close with a man while being in a boyfriend/girlfriend relationship.  In fact, I think even before being considered bf/gf I have never done any of the above.  I know I didn’t with Fiance. 

    Post # 53
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - ceremony at a gazebo outside, reception at neighboring restaurant on a lake

    View original reply
    @Loribeth:  I count that as cheating because you were still married.  Not to mention that it probably still hurt and broke the trust of your husband.  Others may disagree though, just my opinion.  No judgement at you though!  Everyone makes mistakes. 

    Post # 54
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - ceremony at a gazebo outside, reception at neighboring restaurant on a lake

    View original reply
    @s.renea9:  Sigh.  I’ve been that girl too.  He had talked for a while about how his relationship was really bad and that he was 100% going to break up with her but he wanted to do it face to face and she was in France (he was at school here in America) and he would see her in a month.  I slept with him when we were drunk one time and didn’t again.  I found out a couple months later that he was still with the girl in France and still trying to sleep with other people in America.  I still feel bad.

    Post # 55
    Member
    1170 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 2013

    View original reply
    @boynamedgirl:  Thanks, I dont feel bad about it. I think after being abused for so many years and the separation and the fear of being by myself. I just needed comfort. 

    I was in the hospital for almost 9 weeks after the beating. I was in a coma for the first 3 and a half weeks. My friend was there everyday. They had arrested my ex. I got out of the hospital and wasnt doing so well. I kept waiting to hear from the police that he had escaped and was coming after me and our kids. My friend just kind of stayed with me. I couldnt sleep alone because I didnt sleep. I sat awake waiting for him to come even though he was in jail. I was slowly losing my mind from lack of sleep and from the fear. 

    It wasnt planned, I was having a break down, my friend even tried to leave because he thought it was a bad idea. However it was just nice to be touched in a nice way and not in anger.

     

    Post # 56
    Member
    65 posts
    Worker bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    never ever!

    Post # 57
    Member
    4410 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: December 2010 - Savannah, GA

    View original reply
    @Shera2550:  I agree it was cheating.  I’m just being honest. It’s not something I’m proud of, but it’s also not something I feel guilty about either.

    At that point I was not worried about breaking my husband’s trust, because I had already decided our relationship was over.  Emotionally, I was no longer married. I was just waiting for the divorce to be final. 

    My ex never knew. I didn’t see any reason to tell him, because he was already hurt by the fact I was divorcing him. I didn’t want to add insult to injury.  

    Post # 58
    Member
    2977 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2011

    Kind of emotional cheating on a really really old bf I had in college. It wasn’t the healthiest of relationships, really, and I went seeking what was missing out in someone else who I *knew* for a fact was interested in me. I led him on big time and to this day feel really guilty about it, even tho it was 10 years ago.

    Post # 59
    Member
    192 posts
    Blushing bee
    • Wedding: April 2013 - ceremony at a gazebo outside, reception at neighboring restaurant on a lake

    View original reply
    @Loribeth:  That makes sense.  I didn’t realize you were already going through the divorce process.  I agree with you that it would have just added insult to injury.

    Post # 60
    Hostess
    11163 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper

    Yes I have (past relationship). I am not proud of it but it happened.

     

     

    Post # 61
    Member
    2522 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: December 2012

    In my last relationship, I started dating a man that was separated from his wife but not officially divorced. He didn’t tell me until a bit until the relationship, but I felt guilty about it when I found out. I didn’t end it immediately though. I dunno what that counts as.

    We did break up though, a while later.

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