(Closed) Have you ever criticized a wedding to the bride?

posted 7 years ago in Recaps
Post # 47
Member
3768 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2013 - Brookfield Zoo

I would never ever, so that is a really great point that when someone replies to a thread and says “you don’t need xx, I didn’t and no one missed them,” you really need to take that with a grain of salt!

Post # 48
Member
6014 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: March 2012

We didn’t have favors and people didn’t miss them, I know this because I have a few cousins that just blurt stuff out, they are missing that censor part of your mouth.  They did comment on how I hadn’t managed to work the “frizz” out of my hair, my FGs dresses didn’t match, and my dad looked tired.  Yeah so i figured none of the four of them said one word about the favors… no on missed them 😀

Post # 49
Member
1748 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I’ve asked several brides during my planning process what is it they’d change about their wedding and often they respond with things I also found to be a bit odd or I didn’t like, but even then I’d never say, “oh yeah! that was so weird!”. But really, what’s the point in criticizing someone’s wedding post-wedding? It’s already done and gone!

Post # 50
Member
1092 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

What’s the point of telling a bride after the wedding what you didn’t like, it’s not as if she’s going to say

“Oh, thank you for letting me know. I’ll try to remember that for my NEXT wedding!!”

Post # 51
Member
3051 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

No I’d never critize it to the bride but I’ve been to one where it was AWFUL & we seriously ALL talked about it afterward….for a WHILE, not just that night/the next day…

I definitely think people/brides should stop saying “We didn’t have xx & nobody missed it!” They are definitely NOT in their guests’ head and I’m pretty sure someone out of their 150 guests, didn’t like the fact that there wasn’t a bathroom basket or there weren’t any favors. It’s always bothered me a tiny bit when I read “nobody missed it”

On the same note, idgaf if someone misses something at my wedding lol

Post # 52
Member
7899 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

No. That just wouldn’t be polite.

I went to a wedding that was a seating disaster because there was no seating plan. It was a complete mess. Plus, the wedding party ate before coming out, which was fine, but no one communicated this to the guests so none of us knew we should eat because we were all waiting for the grand entrance.

I know a lot of us were annoyed at these things, but the rest of the wedding was great: lots of tasty food, plentiful alcohol, fun decor, amazing music.

So, it’s completely possible that bride thinks no one minded the seating situation, but that is certianly not the case.

Post # 53
Member
2780 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Meowkers:  I think it depends on ones relationship with the bride. I straight up told my Maid/Matron of Honor that she should have booked a venue rather then do it at a family home, it was +40C that day and in the evening the mosquitoes were unbearable. It was a fun time overall, but everyone was dying in the heat.

I wouldn’t comment anything more then the polite, lovely wedding, to someone I wasn’t close with, and I wouldn’t ever say anything truly negative to even a close friend.

Post # 54
Member
1833 posts
Buzzing bee

“we didn’t have X at our wedding and no one missed it.”  This is one of my pet peeves.

We had a pot luck and no one complained.

We made people pay for soda and no one complained.

We had very little seating for everyone and no one complained.

Yes they did, just not to the bride.  At the wedding where I had to pay for a Diet Coke I was seriously peeved.  I had to stick out a 3 1/2 hour gap in the middle of BFE, drive 35 minutes out of our way to find an Applebees, buy some food there to kill time, and you couldn’t even provide free soda?  Yeah, I complained – to DH and to and along with some of my other coworkers.  Bride never knew.

We try to cover all of our bases as far as etiquette and to provide everything for our guests when one of our girls gets married because I would hate to think what they might be saying!

Post # 55
Member
7638 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Meowkers:  Perhaps there’s another reason why brides don’t get criticised: most guests don’t care. I mean that in a good way: most guests don’t care if the colour is wrong, or the centrepieces are missing, or there aren’t favours, or their favourite cousin wasn’t a bridemaid, or they have to pay a few dollars for an extra drink. So long as the day isn’t actually unpleasant (e.g. too hot, too crowded, not enough food), most guests don’t criticise the bride because it was a pleasant day and they were happy.

Post # 56
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I figure the quirks of a wedding are what make it unique.  Plus lots of differences are related to budget.  That being said, I sure have said my share in the car ride home, mostly about drunk groomsman and their dancing/flirting/”jokes”

Post # 57
Member
753 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

@Meowkers:  I was thinking something similar when I was shopping for preowned dresses. Everyone re-selling had something along the lines of “everyone loved my dress”, “it was the most unique gown they had ever seen” etc….

But…I feel like most brides would automatically get a lot of those compliments…

 

Unfortunately my mom is sometimes a bit rude, I may potentially hear some complaints from her on the big day. 

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