(Closed) Have you ever had an ex that you wondered…what if?

posted 3 years ago in Emotional
Post # 31
Member
4272 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

My exes who I dated I KNOW why we broke up so there never was a sense of what if.  There was this guy who I dated before my husband though…we went on only three dates and the chemistry was high and we were both definitely interested, but he warned me that his job was sucking his soul and he had been applying out of state for jobs.  As it turns out he moved 1300 miles away within two months after we started talking.  I wondered “what if he never left?” for a while after he moved because the dude was such a sweetheart, we got along swimmingly, and he was HOT haha.  Obviously there was never any reason to stay in contact so we stopped texting/calling each other once he found out he would move.  I remember odd things about him now, even though it is in ancient history: he was 6’4″ and like 140 despite eating like a horse.  He had glasses and had the cute nerdy look to him.  He stunk at bowling (our first date).  He really wanted a dog.  He maintained a golf course as his job.  I definitely do not miss dating, but what a cutie!

Post # 32
Member
1312 posts
Bumble bee

There was a guy I dated in college and I ended up leaving him to be with an (asshole) ex boyfriend. I felt awful but my ex was so manipulative and I was young and naive. Years later I messaged the guy a heartfelt apology, and he ended up responding 6 months later (we weren’t friends on Facebook so my message went to that black hole Lol). He accepted my apology and we began reconnecting but then I met my now-husband. The timing (among other things) was always off for us. Idk how he’s doing now, but I’d like to send him another message, tho I doubt he’d be receptive since I’m married lol. I have no doubt my husband is my soulmate and who I’m meant to be with, but I’ll always have that “what if?” because me and this guy never had a proper relationship. But then I’d always say “what if?” if I blew off my husband for him. So, who knows lol.. 

Post # 33
Member
2123 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: December 2017

I’ve never regretted breaking up with an ex. Ever. Of course instantly I feel heartbroken, but quite quickly after that I’ve felt relief. It isn’t until after we’ve broken up that I can see how badly they’ve been treating me. I do look back and think “what if?” though, but more like “what if he didn’t break up with me? Would I still be with him? I bloody hope not!” My current beau is soo perfect for me. We’re a wonderful match. 

Post # 34
Member
223 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

princessforever77:  Sure I have. But it doesn’t change my confidence in my choice.

Post # 35
Member
317 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2018

I love my Fiance but I keep in contact with one of my exes. Not like seeing each other often or anything but, still keep up with what’s going on. He recently bought an apartment in Melbourne city and got himself a beautiful pay raise. He is in computer science and has a good job, he has also lost about 40kg. We fell apart because we were stale. If anyone has seen “how I met your mother” when Barney and Robin get together, gain weight and feel terrible, that’s what we did. We wernt good for each other and I didnt have any love but I did have fondness left for him when we broke up. We have done great without each other and I always wonder what life I would have had with him. Not that I thought he was the one or we had an epic love, we fit together well and he could have been a great provider.

Post # 37
Member
1603 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

princessforever77:  Yes..and I’m marrying him!

My Fiance and I were together in 2008, very serious, lived together but both of us were very messed up from previous relationships that we’d just come out of. We loved each other but the timing was completely wrong. He had moved interstate to be with me and ended up moving back, I offered to move and be with him and he said no. I was shattered but I moved on, met my ex-husband and married him. 

In retrospect the marriage was a huge mistake – I was still messed up over the breakup with my now Fiance and went for someone who was basically his exact opposite. We had huge issues but he convinced me that things would change and like a moron, I bought it. The marriage was over in all but name when I went to the footy and ran into my ex. Three months later we were together, engaged two months after that.

I do believe in The One and I believe we were always that for each other, but the timing was just wrong first time around.

Post # 39
Member
3172 posts
Sugar bee

There was someone who I was in love with and who loved me but we could never be together. in another reality we would have been.  I have conciously said goodbye to that love story as I’ve prepared for marriage but it was a big love in my life and quite emotional to accept it will never be. my biggest apart from my fiancé 

Post # 40
Member
251 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: City, State

Absolutely yes, with all of my exes. When I feel that way, I schedule an in-person meeting with them. Within 5 minutes, I’m like, “Yeah, THAT was the reason I broke up with you” 😛

Post # 41
Member
123 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

Kacie209:  I love this! I think/feel the same exact way!!

Post # 42
Member
1855 posts
Buzzing bee

Of course! I think…”What if I could actually get that valuable time back?” 🙂

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