(Closed) Have you ever heard of this?

posted 6 years ago in Etiquette
  • poll: Veils worn over the face...just for virgins?
    Yes I have heard of this and agree : (4 votes)
    4 %
    No, I have never heard of this but agree : (1 votes)
    1 %
    Yes I have heard of this, but who cares? : (61 votes)
    56 %
    No, I have never heard of this, and it wouldn't bother me : (42 votes)
    39 %
  • Post # 3
    4355 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: June 2013

    I have heard it, I think it was an old school tradition. I’m of the camp of “wear it however you like”, I tried mine on over my face, it didn’t look right on me though. But ya, I’ve heard of it.

    Post # 4
    1402 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: May 2015

    Back in the middle ages veils were worn to protect from the evil eye.  Take these things with a grain of salt.

    Post # 5
    1211 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2014

    That’s ridiculous. I mean, the original meaning for a white dress was to = virgin/purity…why did that change and not the veil?? Tell your friend to ignore how rude her coworker was! She will look beautiful! 

    Post # 6
    4038 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2010

    I’ve heard of it, but put it in the same category as wearing white…I hope she ignores your very rude coworker and wears it anyway, however she wants. 

    Post # 7
    5547 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: December 2011

    Traditionally? Perhaps that was true. Anymore it doesn’t and it was super rude to say that to someone!

    Post # 8
    10573 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: January 2011

    I’m in the who cares camp, but if it were a friend who has kids (or was an encore bride) that was planning on doing it, I would suggest she reconsider.  I would never be that rude about it!

    Post # 9
    3697 posts
    Sugar bee

    Your co-worker is a little confused and MsMonkey is right: it’s the white dress that signifies virginity, the veil originated from the time when couples didn’t meet before the wedding, and they were used to keep the bride’s face hidden so the groom wouldn’t decide she was ugly, refuse to marry her, and inadvertently start a war between the tribes, clans, etc.

    All that notwithstanding, it’s a tradition that is no longer strictly observed, and your co-worker is making herself look foolish by making a big deal of it.

    Post # 10
    9955 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: December 2012

    Traditionally, YES a veil (particularly one with a face covering), was a sign of being a first time Bride.

    And YES there are definitely references to virginity… for more info check out this entry from Wikipedia (scroll down to find the section on Wedding Veils)


    I am a Bride-to-Be “of a certain age”… and so I’ve seen all this in my 50+ Years.  Women who were Encore Brides traditionally would choose a hat as their head-covering, and perhaps something small (and more open in form / netting) such as a Birdcage Veil when they were married the second time.

    But these days, a lot of these traditions have fallen by the way-side (or at least the knowledge of their meanings)… so more and more Brides are choosing to do things like wear Veils, White, or full-blown Wedding Dresses for their subsuequent marriages (I myself a bit of an Etiquette Snob is certainly entertaining the idea of a long gown in a Wedding Dress style that is made in non-white… Champagne Sheath with a Lace Overaly… and some sort of a head covering that mimics a more traditional veil in look and length)

    So ya, it is true your friend may have those who consider what she has chosen as inappropriate… but there will probably be just as many in attendance who thinks it is all quite fine.

    Hope this helps,

    PS… Lol, as an Etiquette Snob, I can say that the Co-Worker who called her out in public, made fun of her… and spread the word thru the Office was commiting a HUGE breach of Etiquette (kind of ironic when you think of it).  And she was BEYOND RUDE !!


    Post # 12
    3583 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    I think your other coworker was incredibly rude.  To me, its a simple unveiling of the bride and I think it is a very lovely part of the ceremony.  It’s where he (or she) can see their bride, truly, for the first time.  I think it’s very sweet and I don’t give a hoot whether that person has done the naked mambo.

    edited for lame spelling

    Post # 13
    4151 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: September 2018

    @MsMonkey:  I know a few people who don’t believe one should wear white unless they’re a virgin…

    Technically the whole wearing white thing was as much a fashion statement as it was a statement of purity. The concept’s only been around 160 years (which in the scheme of things is no time at all) and didn’t even become available to the masses until post WWII really. It was primarily for the fashionable and wealthy before then.

    Post # 14
    2254 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    Your poor coworker! Mean people suck. She should do what she wants and to hell with what other people think. 

    Post # 15
    785 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    I’ve actually never heard of it. I do know about the “white being for virgins,” but like other PP’s have said…who cares! You should be able to wear what you want and how you want on YOUR wedding day without someone laughing at you. Not to mention, if someone is laughing at the bride behind their back (or even to their face), they are not true friends and therefore shouldn’t have money wasted on them by inviting them.

    I hope your friend takes it with a grain of salt and lets it roll of her back.

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