(Closed) Have you ever heard the first year of marriage is the WORST!?

posted 10 years ago in Married Life
Post # 47
330 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I think this would most true for couples are moving in together for the first time. Its been difficult for me moving into a 1 bedroom with my husband. No personal space has made us very aware of each other’s personal habits!

The other major factor, I think, is expectations. Sure many of us dated for ages or lived with their fiancees, but a lot of us expectations of how our married life would be. I know I’m suprised how much less quality time my husband spends with me, how much less sex we have, and much time we spend with our parents. I had a different picture in my head, and it has made the start of our marriage harder. 

I definitley think we will experience more “difficult” moments in future years of our marriage, but I imagine our relationship will be more solidified at the point.

Post # 48
8941 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2009

The part that was hard for us was moving across the country away from everyone we knew during our first year of marriage and I was home alone a lot while he was traveling.  That has to do with circumstances though more than it being our first year of marriage.

Post # 49
737 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

I’ve heard it too. It is pretty rough dealing with new “permanent” issues, but we’re willing to work on them. I buy it, but also I HOPE it’s true, because if it is, that will be AWESOME!

Post # 50
537 posts
Busy bee

Even though we are fighting now over looking at houses, I have to say the overall stress and fights in the relationship has gone down a lot. But I think of us the timer will start once we live together, it’s taking some time. I have always heard this though

Post # 51
2294 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

I’ve heard of it, but didn’t experience it.  DH and I are 1/2way through year 2 (civil ceremony was April 16th) and still going strong.  🙂

Post # 52
244 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

My first 6 months were ROUGH. Not with him, but learning to be a part of HIS family. Now that Im almost a year in things are great! We all know eachother much better now. I lived far away before the marriage so none of them really got to know me until I moved to their area. 

Post # 53
92 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

My best friend got married a few years earlier than I did. She had a really hard time her first year and did consider leaving him. Now they have been together 4 years. It seems that things have gotten better for her since the first year. For me, our worst year was the year after college (ie. the first year that we lived together), not first year being married.

Post # 54
16 posts
  • Wedding: October 2011

My year is coming up in a few days and I must say the first day was rough for us.  We did not live together or combined our finances together before we got married, but I don’t think this the issue.  Within a year we moved to another state and my husband got suspended from his job (not good).  He found a new job it’s 60% less money than the other job so I’m holding down the bills.  Additionally I think we are not connecting emotionally so I’m going to counseling for my own sanity and then we are going together.

I have heard the first year could be the hardest however I may case I wish someone would have told me why it was the hardest so mentally I may have been more prepared.

It varies on the stress level of what the couple is experience and how they are adjusting.

Post # 55
353 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: September 2012

I’ve heard this, but wonder if it’s slightly different if you’ve already lived together for over a year? I hope so anyway – it means we’ve skipped all the crappy stuff if that’s true lol.

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