Post # 31
My brother ruined my uncle’s wedding when we were kids. I still remember, because it was so awful.
He hadn’t wanted to go at all; we were both the kind of kids for whom weddings just meant boredom, uncomfortable clothes and bad food. So during the ceremony, as a kind of protest, he burst out in really loud fake laughter, and pretended he couldn’t stop. Every time one of my parents tried to shush him, he just raised the volume. He did it all through their vows. Just “HA-HA-HA-HA-HA” for a good ten minutes.
It was especially bad, because my father was the only one of his four brothers to attend; the other two stayed home because the bride was Korean and they were/are racist assholes. So my uncle had been really happy to have our family’s support, and then my brother went and pulled that.
I cannot remember, for the life of me, a more loaded, silent and angry drive home ever.
Post # 32
My son ruined my experience at a friend’s wedding, but not anyone else’s. It was outdoor at the bride’s family cottage. I had a babysitter stay with him (14 months old) inside the (not sound proof) cottage so I could be present at the ceremony. I sat at the back in case I needed to escape to him. Right after she walked down the aisle I heard the screaming start. I knew nothing could stop that except for me, so I ran in to the cottage and missed the rest of the ceremony. The reception was equally awful. It was really cramped in the restaurant that we went to after and he was like a bull in a china shop. I basically scarfed down my food and left. It was a really sad situation as I was the only friend to attend from the Bride’s side.
Post # 33
No but I did see someone’s dog (dressed up as a ring bearer, no less) take a big dump right under the backyard wedding tent once.
Post # 34
I wouldn’t say that it “ruined” the wedding, but at my friend’s wedding, her niece absolutely disrupted the ceremony. She was about five at the time and the flower girl. She refused to sit with her grandparents and kept running up to the bride and groom while they were saying their vows. Her mom (one of the bridesmaids) tried to get her to go sit down and she shrieked, “No!!!” and threw her basket. She then started twirling and dancing while the couple were saying their vows. The whole time (I was also a bridesmaid) I was just watching like 0_o. Because if that were my kid, I would have grabbed them and immediately left the ceremony. My mom always said she treated our public tantrums the same as she would us having explosive diarrhea – in that we need to leave IMMEDIATELY.
I always look at the parents in these types of situations. Maybe you’ve learned to tune out your child’s shrieks, but other people haven’t, and a wedding is not where they should be allowed to roam free.
Post # 35
I’ve been to more weddings than I can count and I definitely have seen kids “ruin” weddings, or at least ruin what the couple had planned/envisioned:
– children running to parents in the bridal party standing up during the ceremony and not going back to their seats/to their seated parent
– kids screaming/talking/playing loudly during the ceremony in front of the videographer to the point where audio isn’t salvageable
– kids sticking their hands in the cake or other buffet/communal food vessels
– kids running out during the couple’s first dance and wanting to stay on the dance floor
– kids screaming during speeches and parents not removing them
What can I say, I know a lot of rude parents apparently. I blame the parents, not the kids, but it’s still annoying AF in my opinion.
All that said, I was fine with kids at our wedding but we would have had to add 75 (literally) and obviously we are no longer having a wedding anywhere near that size, let alone 75 kids alone.
Post # 36
Yes. They were running around prior to the reception while the parents ignored them and ended up breaking a bunch of champagne flutes on the head table.
Post # 37
I’ve seen a ceremony where the flower girl was kept up at the front with the wedding party and she would not be still (understandably). People kept giggling at her antics, so you knew they weren’t paying attention to the couple getting married, but I assume the couple was ok with that. The worst I saw was at a reception where a couple kids actually laid down on the dancefloor and rolled back and forth across it most of the night, preventing anyone from dancing. People ended up just leaving early. That was the moment where I decided I’d rather not to have any children at my own wedding….
Post # 38
I wouldn’t be a fan of children at weddings, especially the reception where people are drinking large amounts of alcohol, which tends to be the norm. Also it’s an extremely long day for children & a long time to be on good behaviour with no running, playing, shouting, singing whatever kids like to do to burn off energy.
Like people have mentioned it can be more a parent issue than the child themselves as kids will be kids. I was at a wedding a few years ago with a huge amount of children & while the church went smoothly, aside from the usual cry or child needing the loo, the reception was like a playground. Running around, screaming, pulling the table cloths off the table (crockery everywhere), semi control was only regained when they knocked the wedding cake over & the groom made an announcement that children had to leave due to hotel policy.
I had my nieces & nephews only at my wedding, most of my friends were grateful for a nice day to themselves. I never understand why bees get so fussed about it, if you want a CF wedding have one, if you love having kids at weddings, invite them.
funny story was at a wedding last year in a remote part of Ireland which has free grazing & as we were listening to a reading there was a loud baabaaa & we turned to see a sheep walking down the aisle, there was total silence then laughter followed by a quick thinking musican playing here comes the bride!! Thankfully the uninvited guest was escorted out quickly before leaving any droppings but the pics & videos are brilliant!!!
Post # 39
Be noticeable or even disruptive? Yes. Ruin? No.
And most of my friends have families full of kids and all of my cousins have six kids a piece (except the one slacker who has four). There’s been disruptions and meltdowns. But neither my family nor my friends are assholes and know how to plan for their kids attending events and aren’t afraid to parent their children and handle a situation when it needs handling. Any disruption was handled and we moved on. People still got married and food and fun was had.
For most things short of something so egregious it compromises safety of guests or is completely negligent parenting, I think “ruined” is mostly a creation of your own making. If you choose to view things as catastrophic and ruined…they’ll be catastrophic and ruined. If you choose to view them as just things that happened in an eventful day where at the end of it people still got married and people spent time together…then you end up with an event that wasn’t catastrophically ruined.
Honestly, not that the kids in question were perfectly behaved cherubic angels (they were not) but I’ve had far more negative experiences at a wedding due to drunk assholes than negative kid experiences, including but not limited to fights breaking out, being aggressively hit on and physically dragged across the dance floor, witnessing puking and pissing in public places, and my one friend’s -in law getting so drunk during cocktail hour they got thrown out by venue staff during the first half hour hour of dinner for molesting the catering waitstaff. I’m not a big kid person but I can brush off a kid being predictably unpredictable and their parent escorting them out and move on with my night way easier than I can seeing a grown man whipping his dick out to piss in a parking lot or witnessing horrified college kids just trying to earn extra cash over the summer get their crotch grabbed while carrying a tray of dinner plates.
Post # 40
- Wedding: September 2017 - California
Nothing that really sticks out, though I have heard babies crying during ceremonies, in a couple of cases it made it harder for me to hear the vows, but that’s about it. I had a few very young kids at my wedding and we didn’t have any issues at either the ceremony or the reception, but I am guessing their parents left the reception early to get them to bed.
Post # 41
I haven’t personally seen kids ruin anyone’s wedding but I definitely understand why people are nervous to have them at a special event they’re spending thousands of dollars on. I had a child-free wedding more due to cost than anything else; there are so many children between our families that there was no way we could afford them all and it wasn’t fair to pick and choose who got to bring kids.
Post # 42
Nope, I’ve never seen that happen.
Post # 43
Actually no. Nothing like anything posted here. I also haven’t been to that many weddings…
Post # 44
nope, literally never and I’ve been to a 100 plus weddings in my life and almost all of them had children in attendance. I have seen some poor adult behaviour at a few. 😕
Post # 45
- Wedding: February 2018 - UK
I don’t know that ‘ruin’ is the right word, but I’ve definitely seen them disrupt weddings. I’m CFBC because I really dislike being around children, so I may just be more sensitive to it though.
At my cousin’s wedding, her toddler shrieked throughout the ceremony until she could go to her parents, and then continually interrupted the entire vows. It was less bad because at least it was their own kid, and a lot of people laughed, but it was definitely disruptive.
At my friend’s wedding, the bride was almost an hour late, and then it was a long church service, so the child guests were understandably restless and a little disruptive. The bigger issue was at the reception though, one kid in particular screamed and yelled throughout the entire speeches and nobody could hear a thing. Later on he was bombing round the dance floor, getting in everyone’s way. Definitely a parenting issue more than a child issue.
Ive also BEEN the disruptive child – when I was 4, I was a bridesmaid for my mum’s cousin. At the start of the reception I projectile vomited all over my dad and the dance floor. Totally not my fault, but I’m sure it impacted people’s enjoyment!
We had a child free wedding purely because we didn’t want the disruption factor. The people close to us know I’m not happy being around kids, and were totally fine with it. I think different people have different levels of what they’d consider disruptive and day-ruining.