Having a boy for our firstborn

posted 1 year ago in Pregnancy
Post # 16
Member
224 posts
Helper bee

We wanted a girl initially too. We are having a boy.. you get used to the idea, and then eventually excited for it. He will be lots of fun, I’m sure. Just take some time to process.

Still not thrilled I have to teach him to wash under his foreskin but oh well lol.

If you’re interested in more than one then you always have another 50/50 chance next time!  

Post # 17
Member
9198 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2013

i was sure my 2nd was going to be another boy.  everything felt exactly the same.  and i had no idea how to be a mom to a girl.  but a girl popped out, it took a week or so to get used to changing girl diapers and have pink loads of laundry.  but i love her with alll my heart and wouldn’t change a thing.

Post # 18
Member
663 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2018

I personally don’t understand the point of anyone convincing themselves of the sex of their baby prior to having confirmation. It’s a 50/50 chance and it just seems like you’re setting yourself up for disappointment. I mean, I can understand if the ultrasound tech screwed up or something along those lines happened, but I digress. 

I don’t have children yet but I have heard numerous times from friends and family members that it doesn’t really matter the sex of the baby once it’s born. You’re just happy to finally meet them. 

And, as others have said, having a girl wouldn’t guarantee you someone who loves pink and sparkles and girly things like you, just as having a boy doesn’t guarantee you someone who loves sports and getting dirty. Children aren’t one dimensional, either. 

Post # 19
Member
1744 posts
Bumble bee

My mom desperately wanted a girl after having two boys, for similar reasons as you. I turned out to not be a girly girl, I just wanted to do whatever my brothers were doing. I was a disappointment to her in that regard and it damaged our relationship since I didn’t turn out like she wanted/expected.

Post # 20
Member
901 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

I kind of understand how you feel…  I am pregnant with my second right now (first is a boy) and my first thought was, what if it’s a girl!?  

I’m a tomboy with a bit of girly girl mixed in.  I’m adventurous, love sports and have always got along better with guys than I do with girls.  My husband and I both felt more comfortable about having another boy.  With time I’ve been coaching myself to accept that it’s just as likely a girl… and for some reason, the more time passes, the more I think it’s a girl.  I find out in a week. sealed

Gender disappointment is a real thing so don’t beat yourself up about it.  From experience I will let you know that regardless of what gender you have, it’s likely that as children they’ll love both boyish and girly things.  My son loves dressing up in tutus, “putting on makeup” with mummy, doing his hair, playing with his kitchen (he loves “making me coffee”) and he’s actually got a knack for coordinating his outfits.. sometimes.  

Remember also that even if you have a girl, there’s no guarantee she’ll be a girlie girl.

Don’t beat yourself up for feeling this way, but take this time to accept it and think of all the awesome things you can do with your new child, regardless of gender!

Post # 21
Member
9961 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

“Girly stuff” is surface stuff. Teach your kid about art and nature and animals, how to be a good person and what kind of morals you want them to grow up with. Go play at the park, attend fall festivals, ride around looking at Christmas lights at the holidays.

These are the things that matter and will bond you to your child, and none of them are gender specific. 

Post # 22
Member
9223 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

catskillsinjune :  italianbride0508 :  llevinso :  +10000

I wanted a boy and had a boy, but here he is rocking one of his ruffle onesies….

He also has “girl” and “boy” toys. He has a pink bathtub and a pink playpad. My job is to raise a sweet child and help him find himself and pursue whatever he loves in life — no matter what that is. Think outside the box, having a boy doesn’t have to mean trucks and football. Open his eyes to everything, love him, teach him to be kind, and see where his own personality takes you both.

Post # 23
Member
9223 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

llevinso :  also, lol I so hate that kitties=girls and puppies=boys. We also have lots of kitty girl things 🙂

Post # 24
Member
8099 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

anondotcom :  on the upside you never have to teach him how to use a tampon! 

Post # 25
Member
2855 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

That’s totally daddy’s job lol. As daddy has one daddy can deal with the maintainence education lol. 

 

Though as daddy has alopecia its more likely to be me who teaches him to shave lol anondotcom :  

Post # 26
Member
224 posts
Helper bee

Twizbe :  in our case, daddy does not in fact have a foreskin… odd generation out.  Ah the 80s.

Post # 27
Member
2855 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

Oh well – least it’s not something you have to worry about for ages (FYI for OP too NEVER pull a baby’s foreskin back to clean. It will damage things and cause infection) anondotcom :  

Post # 28
Member
1047 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2019

I promise you, when he arrives you will love him so overwhelmingly that you will forget that you ever wanted him to be anything else than what he is.  I’ve seen it countless times with friends – gender disappointment before given birth and complete, rapturous love afterwards. 

Before my first niece was born, my brother REALLY wanted a son, for the same reasons that you wanted a daughter.  But as soon as she arrived, he adored her so overwhelmingly that he still swears all he ever wanted was a house full of girls (lucky – they have four!).  And he’s taken to parenting girls brilliantly; he does the dance recitals and tea parties with just as much joy as their T-ball leagues and camping trips.  It’ll happen for you too.

When he arrives, he won’t be anything but YOUR BABY.  And you’ll think he’s perfect.

Post # 30
Member
6835 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: April 2016

TheGridMonster :  Right?! It’s so stupid! My son was sick the other day and all he wanted to do was lay across my lap and pet his kitty big sister. It was so cute. Boys can like cats too!

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