(Closed) Having Doubts and Super Scared

posted 7 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

Well it seems like you said “Idk” because of the difficult year that you 2 had. I guess we would need to know more about the difficulties that you had with him and how heated things got to tell you if you should be douting your engagement or not. Btw your friends need to support your decision rather they agree with it or not unless the guy is a real loser or something.

Post # 5
Member
7431 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: October 2009

Hmmm, sounds like you are having some issues. I doubted a lot of things in the time of our engagement, but never my husband.

Post # 6
Member
5 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: May 2012

@honeycomb123:I think if you’re having any sort of doubts you need to sit down and talk honestly and frankly with your Fiance.  It’s never easy but make sure to get down to the nitty gritty of what is really bothering you.  I’ve had doubts in the past and when I really sat and thought about them and talked them out with my FI the doubts weren’t about us or him they were more my insecurities and how that effected how I saw us. 

Just make sure you’re excited and commited to the marriage not just excited about the wedding – it’s way too easy to get swept up in the planning madness. 

Post # 7
Member
620 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2012

@honeycomb123: Well since you are not sure if your guy friend might have ulterier motives maybe you should check in with your married or engaged friends. The reason that I say married or engaged girls is because sometimes single and waiting girls get jealous and might give bad advice and a guy as we already said might have ulterier motives. You might also want to see about your family’s opinions. Like your mom or sister or brother(dads can be a bit over protective and not really want to give up their baby lol)

It does look like the money issues you guys are having are going to get worse before they get better and the costs of a wedding might add another thing to fight about so be careful in that area.

About wanting to be suprised, thats not the most important thing in the world and not worth fighting over. Sometimes its better to just know that the guy is going to marry you rather than waiting and waiting and getting stressed out and wondering when and if and then being suprised or even worse being suprised when you have hit your 5 year anniversary and he still hasn’t asked you.

When it comes to getting bord, I know what you are talking about I get pretty bord pretty fast too but you don’t want to keep jumping from guy to guy just to stay entertained and then find yourself single and reaching the age where its getting too late to have kids and most of the guys your age are already taken.

Post # 8
Member
5881 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2010

Check out the book Conscious Bride or her web site http://conscious-transitions.com/conscious-weddings/

Transitions are scary. But you need to figure out if you are just feeling the scariness of a transition in your life or if your gut is telling you that this is a mistake.

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