(Closed) Having gas around your SO.

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 17
Member
2890 posts
Sugar bee

@kerplunk00:  My Fiance has Crohn’s disease. It was extremely stressful for him to pass gas around me. I’m the kind of girl who finds farts in general, hilarious. Like, I would totally laugh hysterically during a bad teen movie, if there was a fart joke involved. So at the beginning of our relationship, learning to know each other better, I admitted to SO that this kind of childish humor I still found funny. And I added : therefore, if you ever have to, do not be worried, I’d not be grossed out or upset or anything, I’ll be laughing ! And that’s when we had THE conversation about passing gas, because he told me it relieved him that I brought up the subject, because he was ashamed at the idea of having gas (which happens a lot because of his disease) in front of me. It took a few months for us to be *comfortable* passing gas in front of each other ; but hey : that’s natural body functions. And it HURTS to keep it inside.

Yes, society tells you it’s gross and you should keep that to yourself, but that’s actually recent in history. In the late 18th century, there were books addressed to nobility to tell them it was not polite to pee or shit in the bushes when you visited friends, and that farting in front of other noble people was not polite (but you could in front of servants). In other words : those books existed because high class society actually DID this in front of each other. 

You can control it to a certain point, and home is a place where you should at least feel comfortable about it. If you let one slip in front of your SO, it’s definitely not the end of the world !

Post # 18
Member
9773 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Our relationship would not have lasted if I had to hide my farts my whole life! haha

Post # 19
Member
22 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2013

When my husband and I were dating, the first time he farted was just after sex, before he pulled out. I was embarassed before that the few times it slipped out but once that happened all bets were off.

Post # 20
Member
2143 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

My Fiance and I have no problem passing gas infront of each other & our sex life is great thank-you-very-much! I couldn’t imagine not being comfortable passing gas in my own home! Especially when you’re not feeling well. 

Post # 21
Member
4605 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

For the first two months of our relationship, I didn’t really pass gas or anything in front of him. Then, In January, I had surgery and had to take a strong round of antibiotics. They gave me HORRIBLE gas. I went and spent a week with FH and I just couldn’t help it anymore. He wasn’t appalled by it or anything. 

After 4 years together, now, if it happens, it happens and we just say “excuse me, I’m sorry”. 

Post # 22
Member
4494 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I’m truthfully not really a gassy person, but if I feel the need then I get up and go to the bathroom. I’ve never really been in the situation you were in though, so I’m not sure what I would have done. We have been together 12 years, but I still don’t fart in front of him. I don’t know, I just feel like its rude no matter how close you are with the person. He tries not to do it in front of me, too. I’ve never made any comments about it one way or another so he just tries to hide it on his own.

I will add that both of our families were always huge on manners so I feel like this has a lot to do with it. You’ve gotta do what you’ve gotta do, but you don’t need to advertise it.

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@MrsPanda99:  +1. I’m all for keeping some mystery in relationships.

Post # 23
Member
2178 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

I think that there is a difference between being all “pull my finger haha” and being sick/ in pain….. what happens when you are pregnant or really sick (ie stomach virus etc)? Unfortunately my DH has had to help me in some pretty yucky situations since we live together and I don’t have family around.

I think that you can still be polite and “keep the mystery alive” but not end up sleeping on the floor of the bathroom/ exiled to the couch once a month

Post # 24
Member
302 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2014

Let ‘er rip!!

That’s what my husband used to say. That and “INCOMING!”

Seriously though, they have pills for that, honey. Just take some Gas-X or Mylanta and go to sleep!

Post # 25
Member
2664 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2015 - Ketchum, ID

@kerplunk00:  I don’t care at all. I’ll fart up a storm if I want to. It’s human nature, everyone does it, get over it. That’s my opinion on it. We’ll openly fart in front of each other. It doesn’t hurt our relationship at all… in fact, there have been times when we’ve burst into hysterics because of something that’s happened resulting from gas. 

 

Post # 26
Member
423 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2011

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@MrsPanda99:   Totally, 100% agree. 

 

To each their own and all that, but this obviously makes the OP uncomfortable and I’m right there with her.  8+ years and I still get up and go to the washroom.  When I’m sick or uncomfortable like that, I prefer to be alone anyway, but the combination, I’d just go to the spare room or to the couch.  

It is what works for me, but others have different levels of comfort with bodily functions.  I also wouldn’t pass gas in front of my parents or siblings – they would be seriously disgusted.  It’s just the way I was raised!

Post # 27
Member
3051 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: February 2015

We just pretend like it didn’t happen or if it was really noticeable say “excuse me” and move on. We had a conversation after living together a year when my SO did it. We’ll laugh sometimes or blame it on the dog =P

I don’t really think it’s about keeping the “mystery” alive and well. You’re living with someone and you know that bodies are made to pass gas. There’s no mystery that your SO/FI/DH farts, it’s just they have to go about trying to hide it. It’s possible sometimes and sometimes it’s not. It’s nbd

Post # 28
Member
634 posts
Busy bee

We posess the humor and maturity of a pair of 8 year olds, so we think farting is hilarious. We still try to not fart in each other’s company, but when it does happen, we break into fits of giggles And then tease each other about various times we have farted (I always win these tease battles, because I scared a fart out of him, and that trump as all current farts on the record.)

Honestlystun OP’s situation, I would start off with trying to just fart in the bathroom because… That’s… Where I like to fart, I guess. But if that didn’t work, I would just explain to him that James Joyce’s ghost is haunting my butt and it was going to be a rough night for us both. (James Joyce, by the way, a BIG fan of lady farts as evidenced in his love letters to a woman named Nora. Like. Really far more descriptive than anyone wants to read lover of farts and things a butt can accomplish in general.)

Post # 29
Member
2836 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@kerplunk00:  If you’re going to live with him at some point, you better get comfortable letting a little gas out here and there.  I just read recently- that everyone thinks that fart more than everyone else.  The average person releases gas between 14 and 26 times a day- even if you don’t realize it.

Thankfully, my Fiance and I are totally cool with this- and ocassionally we’ll high five eachother if one of us had a particularly interesting…release LOL  

And yep, we are totally still attracted to eachother!!

Post # 30
Member
2177 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I always tried to be discreet and rarely intentionally let one fly near my husband… And then, I got pregnant and that all went out the window. I have gas all. the. time. and I wouldn’t survive if I didn’t fart in front of him now. I blame it on the baby, of course.

Post # 31
Member
2249 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

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@JenniBride: 
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@adoc86:  +1. I’ve been with Fiance for almost 8 years, and I still excuse myself if I have to pass gas. A) it’s how I was raised, and B) I just don’t find it necessary to let it go right in front of him. I know he would have zero problem with it; he was raised differently than I was. It’s a personal thing.

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