Post # 1
I was just wondering what others reasoning was for either having children or not? When I was younger, I was dead set on having babies. As I got older and more educated, however, I decided that hell would probably freeze over before I brought kids into this world.
Personally (and please don’t flame me as these are my personal opinions), I think it’s ridiculous that we keep on reproducing when this earth is almost to the breaking point. Science believes that the carrying capacity for the planet is 9 billion. We’re currently at 7 billion, give or take a bit. Come 9 billion, what’s going to happen? Are we going to run out of food? Out of water? Out of land to house everyone? Oh, they are also predicting reaching 9 billion by 2050 if we keep at it the way we are. That’s 37 years away. A. Mere. 37. Years.
I, for one, don’t want to leave a planet like this to my kids. I obviously don’t know what the future holds, but if it turns out to be what we think it’ll be, everyone’s gonna be screwed. I can’t imagine bringing more life onto this planet that we are slowly destroying more and more each day.
BUT, I would like to hear your opinions! Why do YOU want kids? Why DON’T you want kids?
Also, please don’t be offended by the “more educated” comment. I don’t mean it in ANY way that only “stupid” people have kids. I just mean that had I not learned specific things that molded me into the person I am now, I probably would have still wanted babies.
Post # 3
I do, but will likely adopt a child for medical reasons. I have always wanted to raise a child. I love children. Not being able to have my own possibly greatly saddened me and I’m so thrilled to have found someone who is open to adoption
Post # 4
Stupid people *do* have children, but so do intelligent ones. For me, I never actually intended to have children. My oldest daughter was an “oops” that fortunately worked out beautifully for us. I suppose I could have terminated, but I didn’t. Something just clicked for me, like it was meant to happen at the time it was happening. I just couldn’t turn that off.
I realize the world is overpopulated, you aren’t incorrect there, but unfortunately, many of us have a deep and powerful biological urge to reproduce. For me, I also have loved teaching these little creatures about life and love, passing on my snippets of wisdom, watching them grow and discover.. it’s just been an amazing thing that’s happened for me.
It’s scary to think about the world I”ll be leaving them though, and it’s something I’ve struggled with and used as a catalyst to make a lot of changes in my own life. Not to mention, having children made me a better person in general, more capable, more motviated, more generous and kind… I don’t know, this probably all sounds ludicrous.
Post # 5
@maloussii: I have a son, but have the same fears you. I worry every day about the kind of world he’s coming into, especially with increasing natural disasters, etc. But ultimately, having children was so, so important to me and I love him with every bit of my being.
I said to DH one day “I’m worried about bringing DS into a world that can be so harsh,” and DH said “Maybe he’ll be one of the ones to do good.” And I can only hope that we’ll figure this ish out before it’s too late…
Post # 6
I think it is natural to want to have children and experience the experience of having children. I think humans are eternal optimists. I also think it is somewhat biological. I am sure people have many different reasons, some good, some maybe not so good- but I think that is at the heart of the best intentions behind it. I think some people want and can make the world a better place by raising children with values. No family is perfect, but I think raising good kids is hard work, and there is something to be said for it. I think sharing love can go a long way. I went back and forth for years on the subject, and I think thinking it out is a very good thing.
Post # 7
i come from a very small family and i would like a few children.
i love being part of other people’s larger families and can’t wait to have one of my own.
Post # 8
@stuckinwonderland: Doesn’t sound ludicrous at all! I wish more people ended up with those traits after having children. Raising them with love and kindness is what turns them into loving, kind people. I wish all babes were raised with that.
Post # 9
FI and I are very intelligent, healthy, hard-working, level-minded human beings. Our decision to have children is to produce people to replace us.
We can’t have all of the senseless, lazy, unintelligent people out here reproducing and taking up space.
Post # 10
@maloussii: I do not want kids because I want to spend my money on me, not on kids. 🙂
Post # 11
- Wedding: January 2013 - Harbourfront Grand Hall
@cbee: So people that don’t want children are unnatural by your argument?
Post # 12
@Laurenplusalex: I’m sorry you aren’t able to have a biological child. Good for you, for opening your heart to adoption, though. So many little ones in need.
Post # 13
I agree with your reasoning and typically get flamed by family and friends so I just don’t bring it up anymore. However, I do still want children so we are planning on adopting as opposed to bringing more children into the world.
Post # 14
Do you have sources for this information? The tone of your comment implies most people know this. Sue me but I did’t. Why are scientists having children then? What if 2050 comes and the world is fine? Should those of us who want a family just be like, oh well!
What if my child becomes the scientist who will solve the problem? What if they cure cancer?
Post # 15
@TaurianDoll: A friend of mine said close to the same thing when we were having this discussion. I thought it was quite a valid point!
Post # 16
Even as a former coach, I just plain do not care for children. Period. It doesnt matter who they belong to or how wonderful they are, I just do not want any. I went to a tiny, evangelical college that *actively* encouraged finding your spouse there and locking down a ring your senior year. I’d say the little rhyme that they use at freshman orientation but it will be a dead-giveaway if any other Bees went there. The gist of it is “your mate God planned for you is probably here right now in this very room. Find him/her and lock it down.” I *wish* I was kidding.
Anyways, like a good little girl, I mimicked what others there were doing: wanting to have babies and be a wife with a “kind and gentle spirit.” I never meant it, but I just talked the talked.
Pretty much the second I moved out of state after college (WAY out of state) and started living and working on my own, I became very resolute that kids were not for me…and there’s nothing wrong with that.