Post # 1
I’m new to WeddingBee and in the middle of planning my wedding for next June. I know I need to choose my bridal party quickly and I’m really struggling. I knew before getting engaged that this would be a hard process for me – I don’t have many close friends, really, so this has been a bit heartbreaking and overwhelming.
I’m planning on having my sister as my maid of honor and asking my fiancé’s sister to be a bridesmaid so that both sisters are involved. My fiancé will have three groomsmen, so if I leave it at just the sisters, we will have mismatched sides – I’m not sure how important that is these days?
If I do want a third bridesmaid, I think I have two choices. My fiancé is very respectful that this is all my decision, but I think he would secretly love for me to ask his cousin to be my third bridesmaid – they grew up together and he considers her a second sister. I do like his cousin and she’s been very welcoming to me, but in the past, when his cousin and his sister get together, they tend to get a bit clique-y. I don’t know if this would happen in this situation, but I am a bit scared to risk it. The other option is a girl who was my best friend for years. I love her and she’d be very supportive, but she and I are not as close as we used to be and I don’t want to look at pictures years from now and regret it because we’re no longer close. That’s how my dad felt about his best man.
Long story short, I’m not sure what to do and I’d love advice. Thank you so much in advance for any insight!
Post # 2
I would stick with the two bridesmaids. We had an uneven number because one of DHs groomsmen couldn’t come at the last minute and it didn’t really matter one bit. We just had the groomsmen and Darling Husband walk out first individually and the the bridesmaids did the same. It didn’t make one bit of difference to me because I wasn’t there to watch them.
If you’re not close to the cousin and they get al cliquey while doing things for the wedding, you may start to feel left out. That’s not acceptable.
Post # 3
- Wedding: November 2019 - Canada
It would really suck to feel like an outsider in your own wedding party. BUT your sister will be there, so would you actually feel left out? It’s hard to say. In this situation, I would also keep them mismatched. I don’t think that’s a big deal at all!
Post # 4
I think you should stick with the two you’ve chosen – uneven numbers really don’t matter. I think you are better off sticking with a bridal party that is what you want, not one that is forced due to optics.
Post # 5
Mismatched isn’t a big deal at all. We had 6 and 5. The last 2 girls walked with one groomsman.
Post # 6
Uneven number is fine by me! I’ve pretty much cast most rules aside with my wedding.
Post # 7
Go with the uneven number! The only time I’ve ever noticed an uneven bridal party was when there were 2 groomsmen and 8 bridesmaids.
Post # 8
Being a Bridesmaid/Maid of Honour should mean something – its about friendship, love and support, so choose as few or as many as you really want to have supporting you on the day.
Please don’t pick people you’re not that close to just so you have even numbers for a few photos.
Post # 9
Agree that you should stick with the two that you have, if your Fiance wants the cousin involved that badly she should stand on his side.
Post # 10
Okay, I already love WeddingBee – thank you all SO much for your responses! I truly appreciate it! As I read through everyone saying stick with the two already chosen, I found myself feeling relieved, which tells me that is the right answer. I think I just needed to hear it from a few people not involved.
Thank you, everybody!
Post # 11
Also, remember, you *can* change your mind and add the cousin in a little later if you happen to find yourself becomign close with her over the next few months. There really aren’t any rules when it comes to this stuff other than “be considerate of other peoples’ feelings”.