(Closed) He broke off the marriage… I am miserable :(

posted 4 years ago in Engagement
Post # 61
Member
1420 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2016

Now you are just making drama out of it. I am sorry if it will sound harsh but you sound just as immature as he does. Cut contact, tell your family to not get involved because that is just crazy weird, and move on. Or stop playing this dramatic game and get back with him and hope for the best.

You can’t have a cake and eat it too. Right now you are torturing him giving him those small chances (not that he doesn’t deserve being tortured but still) just to take it away.

You deserve better than this.

Post # 63
Member
3884 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

lovemermaid10:  um, I would be mad too if I made an arrangment to speak to someone privately and then their extended family turned up! Geez. Both your families are way too involved in this. I’m sorry but you sound like you’re in high school. I don’t think anyone here was ready to get married.

Post # 64
Member
374 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

you need to total up all the money you have spent on this wedding and take him to court for the full amount. that is not being negative but financially responsible. it may get negotiated to a lesser payment but at least be financially smart. you did nothing wrong.

Post # 65
Member
1400 posts
Bumble bee

I don’t understand why the whole family is included in this drama.  At this point, I don’t think either one of you are mature enough to get married to anyone.  Get both famies out of your relationship.

Post # 66
Member
45 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: July 2015

If I were him I would’ve left as well, like who even does that? It’s unnecessary to bring your whole family into this relationship. It’s embarrassing for anyone to admit they were wrong let alone admit it to your family. It’s better if you both just stop and rethink this whole situation…sorry to say but you both are acting like imbeciles in middle school with all this nonsense. Clearly you both aren’t ready for marriage if something like this is stirring up such huge drama. 

Post # 67
Member
1866 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

sylwia212:  PREACH 🙌🏼

This all sounds really immature. I don’t think either of you were ready to get married, sorry. 

Also, while he has done the wrong thing, bombarding him with your extended family (when he asked for a private conversation with your mother) is ridiculous. Your Aunt, Uncle and cousin? Really? What were you hoping to achieve? 

Post # 69
Member
3884 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2017

lovemermaid10:  well done, bee. That was a hard thing to do. Consider it a learning experience, make a clean break and look to the future, you’re going to be just fine!

Post # 71
Member
1272 posts
Bumble bee

How are you a bad person if he still isn’t paying you back for anything? How are you a bad person if he was the one who was fooling around on you? How are YOU the bad person when he broke the engagement? You are not a bad person, he is manipulative and trying to make you feel bad so you’ll take him back (DO NOT). Just ignore him, unfriend him on everything (facebook, twitter, etc.). Only keep his number so you know it is him trying to text you, so you know not to text him back. Screw that dude.

Post # 72
Member
4823 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

lovemermaid10 :   Please, block him and leave him out of your life.  He doesn’t need “comfort” – be just wants attention.  Let him get his ego stroking from someone else who doesn’t know yet how cruel he can be.  

He treated you poorly, please just move on with your life!! 

Post # 73
Member
922 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

FFS.  What advice do you think is going to have changed from 5 months ago.  You were told then to cut all ties, instead you dragged your whole family into this ridicuous high school shit.

Grow up. 

Post # 74
Member
6448 posts
Bee Keeper

lovemermaid10 :  I read through all of the comments by others and the ones you wrote.  Why are you still allowing him in your life?  I had an ex that I met in 2005, three years later we started dating and did until 2012.  That’s 7 years of history.  It took a while to break off, but I did and guess what?  I met my husband.  This man obviously doesn’t care about you.  It’s the chase for him now to see if he can get you back.  

You need to be a little more like bye, and little less should I give him another chance.

Post # 75
Member
2969 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

lovemermaid10 :  LONGEST.BREAKUP.EVER.

Here’s a piece of advice. Years ago when I was about 20 I had a boyfriend who promised me the world. We were inseparable and I did everything I could to help him through law school and shit going on in his life. I was the dutiful girlfriend. One day randomly he was acting really cold and I sensed it immediately. He asked me to come over and I told him I couldn’t because I had meetings that night. Well, I got out of my meeting early and went to his apartment and there he was with his ex gf in his bed. To my face he was so cold saying he hadn’t felt anything towards me for awhile and she was there just giving him advice but there were other girls hes been talking to. I left heartbroken and confused and PISSED OFF.

A week later the calls started from him, his brother, his friends- all begging me to give him another chance and that he made a mistake and panicked because he was stressed with school and was scared about how strong his feelings were for me. I knew it was bullshit and I ignored them all. If his feelings were so strong he wouldn’t have been seeing other girls and only came back to me when it didn’t work out with them or when he realized he had lost me. He contacted me for months (calls, texts, emails, fb messages and even showed up to places he found out I would be at) until I finally threatened to call the police and the law firm he just got hired from to let them know one of their newly hired lawyers was stalking me. It has been just over 10 years and I have been with my husband for 9 years and married for 2 now and haven’t heard from that creepy loser ever since.

Move on. Cut him off.

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