He cheated, but I have to prove myself

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 31
306 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

Fuck him and the horse he rode in on.  Prove yourself to him?!? Yeah okay.  Prove yourself by not doing his laundry anymore and by not cooking his supper or getting his work lunches ready.  


I hope he gets hemorrhoids

Post # 32
792 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
annabananabee :  <– THIS!!!

The past is done and gone. You have the chance to change the present and future for the better. Remember those vows, they were not just for him, they were also for you… “for better or for worse”. You have done the worse, now time to do the better FOR YOURSELF. GTFO!

Post # 33
792 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
BalletParker :  “He has challenged you to accept that you are worthless. What do you think?”

OMG! I love the way you write!

Post # 35
1405 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2020

This guy is trash. Prove your will to him and leave his ass! The kids will be a lot better off with a strong willed mother who holds respect for herself, trust me.

Post # 36
3970 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2019 - Canada

Why are you even considering staying with a man who was going to leave you high & dry for his mistress? Who got angry at you for making things difficult between him and his mistress? Who is now telling you to prove your worth to HIM??

This isnt what love looks like. This isnt what a healthy, long-lasting relationship looks like. This is a dumpster fire and needs to end NOW. Maybe you weren’t a perfect spouse, but that doesnt mean you have to overlook his wandering dick and put up with this bullshit. Respect yourself enough to demand to be treated with dignity and respect. Get out of this marriage and make a life for yourself and your kids that you can be proud of

Post # 37
2308 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: October 2010

There have been a few posts here lately regarding cheating, with the poster deciding to give the cheater another chance. That’s rarely met by cheers here, but at least in the poster’s case, the husband was crying and apologizing and promising (perhaps insincerely) to never do it again. Your husband can’t even manage to apologize, and in fact DOUBLES DOWN and says you deserve it for being a shitty wife and he will leave you if you don’t step it up a notch? Bee, this guy either doesn’t believe you will ever leave him no matter what he does, or he really doesn’t care if you leave.


PLEASE call an attorney. Most will give free consultations, and they can give you some of the most likely scenarios. I disagree you should pack up and leave. In most states, that puts you at a disadvantage when dividing the assets.


But offhand, you will be advised to save any incriminating screenshots, take note of any bank balances (you can remove money, at least in my state, as long as it’s not more than half of the existing balance), get copies of pension/401K statements, three years of tax returns, a copy of your house appraisal, if you have it, any investment funds outside of the 401K, really, any asset that’s worth any money, as well as any debt, should be inventoried.

Post # 38
585 posts
Busy bee

The only reason he cares now is that it’s on your time frame and not his. Remove yourself as an option and tell him to kiss it. I’m glad your posting on surviving infidelity – those people get it. 

Post # 39
1486 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2019

Be a good example for your children. 

They will have more respect for you in the long run and no matter what don’t be one of those mom’s that posts crazy bull sh*t on facebook ‘THE CRAZY ASSHOLE EX IS AT IT AGAIN!’. Because your kids see that. And even if he is crazy, you don’t need to help him in his craziness. 

Good luck Bee, grab your ovaries and get to gettin. 

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