(Closed) He doesn't like the ring I love. What to do?

posted 5 years ago in Rings
Post # 3
2295 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2013

I think your idea of asking him to pick out of 3 is a good one. But at the end of the day, I think we women tend to care a lot more, and while he may express an opinion, once it is on your finger, in 6 months, 12 months, 12 years – I don’t think he’s going to care that much. But I think you will. So I’d get one you love as long as he isn’t actively opposed.

Post # 6
621 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

I think you should get the one you love! If you love it and it’s within your budget, i’m sure your boyfriend would much rather you be happy than just settling.


Like NAvery said, he isn’t going to care about it in a few months, but you will be wearing it the rest of your marriage, and if you don’t get it, you will just regret it and possibly want to change it later on down the road.


I wouldn’t be concerned about him not liking the ring you love, just because you’re getting married doesn’t mean you need to have the same aesthetic styles. However, if you really do want him to like the ring you will be wearing, then keep looking. You don’t need a ring to announce that you’re engaged. . .  Many people don’t get engagement rings at all!

Post # 7
6359 posts
Bee Keeper

It should represent you both. Keep looking until you find one you both love, or (as was the case with us), if you can’t find it, design it yourselves and have it custom made.

Post # 8
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Arrowchan:  I know what you mean about wanting your SO to like the ring.  For a while my SO was intent that the decision comes down to whether I love it or not. However, I ended up telling him that I really feel like this ring will be a symbol of our love for each other and not just how much he loves me or I love him (if that makes sense? ha) 

Post # 11
350 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2016

Yes, it is a joint purchase, but he’s right…you’re wearing it, not him. My fiance let me pick out my ring for that very reason. At the end of the day, the marriage won’t be about the ring. The ring is merely a symbol. I say, get the ring you want. (:

Post # 13
114 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: May 2013

@Arrowchan:  I am so right there with you girl! I laid the law down for SO about ring prices.  I also would rather spend the money on a vacation or down payment for a house… I just can’t fathom spending over $2000 on a ring that I’ll love no matter what.  I can definately see how the quotes for designing might sound a little steep to you.  I keep telling him to just buy me 100 ring pops and a moissy band for the wedding.  I ran into the same thing about asking jewelers about moissanite.  At first I became really discouraged but I’ve read on here that oftentimes they will do that to get the commission from the more expensive diamond purchase.  So annoying…the customer wants what the customer wants! How hard is that to understand?!

Post # 14
2 posts
  • Wedding: August 2013


This was exactly my situation recently!!  My Guy said to show him some rings that I liked and I had been SET on the Halo style.  I showed him the style and he didn’t seem to complimentary about it which bummed me out.  I asked him to be honest with me about what he thought and his words were “I hate it.” I told him I wanted him to like the ring as well and maybe I would find something else.  Later he came to me and told me he wanted me to have the ring I wanted since I was going to wear it forever and he wanted me to LOVE the ring.

I thought it over and felt assured about getting the one I wanted as I am very particular, selective and couldn’t pretend to like a ring I really didn’t like and I sure didn’t want him spending that amount of money on something I was Ho-Hum over. Yes, it is representing your life together but he is chosing his own band, not me. Since he is going to be wearing it, I want him to like it as well. I know what I would pick for him would not be simple enough.

My ring is done and beautiful!! He still thinks its too gawdy but from what I see, most men tend to like simple styles and women like more sparkle. I felt confident that my guy wanted me to be happy and honestly decided he wanted me to have the ring I would look at through the years and smile!!  Hopefully you will only be married once so make sure whatever you decide on, you chose with your heart!!  (that’s what the guy told me at the store when I couldn’t decide on which ring to go with).

Wish you the best of luck on whatever decision you make!!




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