Post # 1
Ok ladies I need some advice…
I will try to make a long story short
We have been dating for not quite a year yet. We work together and have for the last 3 years. We knew we were going to get married very soon into the relationship. We decided to get engaged this winter and married next. We went looking for rings in August and put the down payment on it a month ago. It will be ready to be picked up in about 4 days. He is planning on proposing to me offically and says he wants to plan something super romantic 🙂
The problem is he doesnt want me to wear it to work 🙁 He just got a promotion AND now his boss just quit. He is super swamped at work and thinks that people will be harassing him about the ring/engagment. I, on the other hand, have been counting down the days until I could finally bust and tell everyone how excited and in love I am. This past month its been killing me to keep it a secret from everyone. I know another month is nothing…but… I feel so deflated, almost like he has rejected me, or taken the wind from my happy sails. I have a little bit of resentment, I guess? I am kind of bummed now and Idont know how to make myself feel better.
Post # 3
Umm… that seems silly to me. DH and I work together as well, and it really wasn’t a distraction at all. Really, the most anybody ever said to him was “Congrats, buddy”. Now, times that by the number of people you work iwth, and that should give you the grand total of how much time making people aware of your engagement will take him. Now, with me people wanted to chat a little more, but that’s your issue to solve 🙂
Post # 4
I think that an unreasonable request for him to make. I would not go along with this, and would be angry that he suggested it in the first place.
Post # 5
I wouldn’t like it very much. Maybe if you were waiting to share the news with family or something you could go without – but seriously. It would excite people for about 10 minutes.
Post # 6
I do want to say before everyone thinks he is a big jerk that he is an amazing person. His parents raised him VERY well. So caring and always thinking about everyone before himself. I have 5 year old son who he has just totally taken under his wing. He is the perfect man for me.
That being said I think its silly & unresonable as well!
I guess I dont really know how to explain to him how “stupid” this is with out using the word stupid and coming across as emotional. When he brought it up, we were in the car driving home and I just… didn’t even know what to say. I don’t want him to think that I don’t care about how he feels, but CMON this is dumb.
Post # 7
People at work really don’t care that much. I barely even told anyone when I got engaged. I don’t think you have anything to worry about. 🙂
Post # 8
Huh? People get engaged and married every day. You’re supposed to pretend you’re not? That’s stupid.
Post # 9
We are going for dinner tonight, maybe I can figure out why this is such a big deal all of a sudden. Maybe he is starting to get nervous about it.
Post # 10
Maybe he could just wait to propose to you until things settle down at work for him? That way you’re not tempted to wear it, and he also gets a chance to get his head on straight at work – let’s face it, if you’ve been given a new job, the last thing you want is everyone talking to you about other stuff when you’re trying to focus on your new duties.
He might be overreacting though – my fiance and I work for the same organisation (different areas, though), and when we got engaged, there was maybe a week of fairly brief congratulations, then it was all over. But we both work in a very relaxed workplace – I’ve been in other workplaces where someone getting engaged basically puts everything else at work on hold while everyone makes a big deal of.
Post # 11
I personally wouldn’t bring up anything until he offically proposes. Let him do it on his own time. I doubt he’s going to expect you not to wear it after that, the propsal just might be coming later than you hoped.
Post # 12
We talked about it a little bit tonight over our dinner out. He has already talked to his Mom & Dad but still wants to talk to my parents. I think he also wants time over the holidays to offically annouce it to the rest of his family before friends & coworkers find out.
I am fine with this, I dont want to push him. This makes more sense than his ” I dont want people bugging me about it” excuse.