(Closed) He forgot…

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
Member
2622 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I wouldnt pretend anything. You want to set the expectations for the future. 

I would tell him what day it is. Tell him that you know he forgot and that it is OK this year, but you do want to celebrate anniversaries in the future and its not OK to forget. Tell him you would like for him to take you out next week on an evening that he plans to celebrated belatedly your anniversary. 

And next year a couple weeks before your anniversary be sure to mention its coming up. You dont want to set him up for failure if he has trouble remembering.

Post # 4
Member
1257 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

I think you should say thing. I do no think it is necessary for you to demand things, like telling him he must take you out to celebrate a belated anniversary. To me demanding something is not healthy. I would inform him of the day, tell him it is important to you, and express that you would like to celebrate anniversaries in the future. At that point it is up to HIM to decide if he wants to make it up to you and you give him the responsibility to make it right. His is an adult and so are you. You two should be able to communicate openly, especially if you plan on getting married at some point.

Post # 5
Member
169 posts
Blushing bee

@impatientlywaiting20:  Did you get an anniversary present for him, or have plans for how to celebrate? If you treat him how you’d like to be treated (i.e., I’ve already hinted that I’m working on my SO’s 1-year anniversary present – something inexpensive but heartfelt) then it sets the expectation that you’d like to celebrate, without being demanding.

Post # 6
Member
1365 posts
Bumble bee

@whydoesithurt:  This is great advice.

OP, be honest and tell him how you feel (assuming the day is over – if it isn’t, he may be bluffing with a proposal up his sleeve).

Post # 7
Member
1417 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@impatientlywaiting20:  My SO forgot our 2 year anniversary too! I got him a card and something little. He felt horrible! I didn’t yell at him or anything. I just said Happy anniversary I got you this. And seriously he felt sooo bad. He took me out to dinner that day and hasn’t forgot an anniversary since.

  I would just tell him. Guys are really bad at remembering things. And if he’s anything like my SO I have to say yay our 3(4,5) year anniversary is coming up!! Lol.

  Try not to be upset!! and enjoy camping! I’m super jealous!

Post # 8
Member
246 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

@ThreeMeers:  +1

I think you should be understanding that sometimes boys forget, I know mine forgets things, especially if he has a lot going on at work. But if this is important to you, you should tell your SO and talk to him about it. The worst you could do is to bottle up your emotions and not say anything. You’ll feel much better after you’ve talked to him, =).

Post # 9
Member
32 posts
Newbee

Sometimes that happens.  Don’t be too bummed about it.  Let him know that he forgot and that it’s ok, but you would like to celebrate in future.

 

My SO can’t really forget ours.  He asked me to be his girlfriend on 6/6/6! Yeap, he was going to ask me the day before but decided that date was better….  I’m definitely not the devil woman!

Post # 10
Member
10367 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2010

If you want to be married to him, you need to learn to voice your feelings and opinions. Holding back will only hurt you guys in the long run. Find a constructive way to discuss how you are feeling!

Post # 11
Member
176 posts
Blushing bee

I’m sorry to hear that. Don’t let him off the hook too easy but just see how the rest of the night unfolds. It is also possible that he is trying to throw you off. My stepdad propose to my mom on her birthday and the whole day before he pretended to not remember her birthday so she was really mad at him until she realized. Best of luck

Post # 12
Member
3092 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Agree with pp sometimes you just forget.  My Fiance and I both forgot our 9 year anniversary hah.  We had realized it was coming up but next thing we knew it had passed.

I don’t think stating your feelings about your anniversary is demanding.  I also don’t think asking for a make-up anniversary date is demanding.  I would ask for this.  I would say I’d really like to celebrate this special milestone right and would like you to plan something.  I’d definitely make sure I was also planning something. 

I also agree that practicing anniveraries and birthdays is important.  We went to couples counseling and the Doc said these are important days and both parties in a couple will have to learn how to celebrate and show the other how much they care because they might have a way of showing it that the other doesn’t quite get.

We went through this whole thing and decided anniversaries are important but should be casual days.  Birthdays for us are very special day and we like the other to do it up and remind us how important we are. 

Post # 13
Member
5002 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2013

We aren’t big on anniversaries, but I always bring it up before hand that our “dating anniversary” is next week or whatever. I bring up birthdays and stuff too, since I know my Fiance has a hard time remembering all that stuff. He’ll remember our wedding anniversary, but I have no problem with warning him about that too! Just makes life easier.

Post # 15
Member
967 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

sorry he forgot…

unfortunately I’m no help, i’m the one who forgets in my relationship!

I was doing up our wedding invites and actually typed the wrong date….lol

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