He ghosted after 5 months of talking everyday. Am so hurt and heartbroken.

posted 4 months ago in Relationships
Post # 31
Member
5563 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: July 2018

If catfish has taught me anything it is that this guy is definitely either your best friend or a random 50 year old woman who lives across the country. 

You can pick one but those are the only two options.

 

 

Post # 32
Member
4042 posts
Honey bee

This was the farthest thing from a relationship OP. There were so many warning signs you chose not to see. You never met him, he could have procured the photos he sent you anywhere. 

Do yourself a favor and stick to flesh and blood boyfriends. You sound very young and extremely naive. I suppose you could do online dating apps, but make sure you see the guy in person, in a public place. 

Seriously, no more cyber relationships. 

Post # 33
Member
244 posts
Helper bee

optimisticstar :  That makes a lot of sense, and I’m very glad you set boundaries and told him upfront what you were and were not comfortabe with that. It really sounds like he took advantage of your distance and connection in order to get what he wanted out of it on his terms. It sounds like he was sort of feeding you bits and pieces of that connection in order to grow your connection to him so that he could exploit it for sexting favors, which is terrible. 

If you were to go forward with online dating in the future, I’d definitely recommend doing apps that connect you with local people that you can meet in person before pursuing any kind of romantic relationship. This gives you a LOT more power in vetting and not speaking to guys who you don’t like/don’t feel comfortable with right away and only meet up with the ones that meet your standards of behavior. As PPs have said: don’t ignore the red flags. Having standards of the way men should treat you is ESSENTIAL, and guys who break boundaries, string you along, or refuse to communicate directly with you aren’t worth any more of your time.

Post # 34
Member
2571 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2017 - Courthouse

Yea, this dude is definitely married. 

OP, if a guy is only messaging you through What’s App or chatting apps, is only messaging you at night or specific times of the day and he’s urgently wanting to sext with you——he’s in a relationship. I guarantee it. 

Post # 35
Member
58 posts
Worker bee

So you met a guy online, he asked for nudes and wanted to sext and when you said no, he ghosted because he was bored. You were not the only one he was texting. You had no relationship. Go watch Catfish and just learn from your mistake.

Post # 36
Member
436 posts
Helper bee

Sounds like a catfish, especially the no talking over the phone. Watch a few episodes of the show Catfish, usually it means they aren’t the age and/or gender they pretend to be, otherwise their voice wouldn’t be a problem. Sorry, bee.

Post # 37
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: City, State

That wasn’t a real person. At least, not who you thought it was. Seriously. Have you ever watched Catfish? Biggest tell-tale sign is when it is text only and they won’t call or Skype, etc. It was probably a middle school boy in North Dakota messing with you.

Post # 38
Member
1114 posts
Bumble bee

Agree with everyone here. Either he wasn’t the guy you worked with, and refused to talk to you on the phone because he thought you would discover that, or he was and he’s married/in a serious relationship and can’t just get on the phone to talk without stirring up trouble. All he wanted to do was use you to masturbate when he was horny. That’s not a relationship. He told you himself, he was just looking for sex and that’s all. I don’t know why you didn’t believe him, but hopefully you have learned a lesson. Don’t let him use you again. Block him on everything and focus on meeting men in real life. 

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