Post # 1
My bf proposed to me and I was so happy about it. About a month later his brother proposed too and put his wedding a month before us at the same church and place.
It has totally hurt both our feelings but has made my fiance loose interest in planing for the wedding. He doesn’t seem excited or wanting to put effort into it. I’m always pushing him and I feel it’s so unfair.
We are having it in his country not mine and I’m having to plan all alone as his parents are helping his brother. I just feel like it’s not anything how I thought it would be. Don’t get me wrong I want to marry him and he wants to marry me but he has lost interest in doing the fancy wedding.
I don’t no what to do. I have these things I want in the wedding and I’m not getting them now. If they hadn’t put there wedding before us it wouldn’t be like this. His brother asked us if it were ok if he did it so close. We said no because to us it feels like your taking the spot light. But he said too bad and did it anyway. His fiance is getting all the attention and going away on a hens night and doing all I wanted but I can’t because I’m only new here. And now my fiance isn’t even interested.
What can I do?
Post # 3
I don’t have much advice but I’m really sorry you’re going through this. 🙁 Have you tried talking to him about how you’re feeling? Or any chance you could pick a different location and make your wedding different?
Post # 4
Yes we have chosen another location but now were rushing to find everything and as he has lost interest now it’s hard and I’m feeling like the thing I’ve waited forever for will not be special and I don’t want to do it when it’s not going to feel special. We might as well do a civil ceremony and save heaps of money.
As his family doesn’t care and I can see why he would loose interest I guess he is hurt. And I would be too if my family did that to me
Post # 5
Remind your SO that it is your wedding and should be as special as you both want it to be.
Even if no one else cares, you do!
We spent a ton of money and incorporated all we wanted because we wanted to.
Pictures are forever, and you only get one day.
Do what makes you happy and on your special day, smile your biggest smile at his brother and his brother’s wife.
Never allow anyone to take away your happiness.
Post # 6
I’m sorry you’re going though this, it’s not fair that your Future Brother-In-Law asked if it was okay, then did it anyway. Would you be alright with putting your wedding off for a bit? I know it sounds really cold hearted to even say anything like that, but my Fiance and I had taked about getting married in aug 2011- and days after we desided (before we told anyone) his cousen announces to the family he’s engaged, and getting married that month. Since Fiance and I had been married before, we kept silent about it, and let them have their moment. Now, another one of his fam is engaged, and his mom asked me what I would do if they pick our month (scream!)- our families are all over, so getting together for weddings is a huge deal.
I can see why he would be hurt, and it’s not fair to you to be put on the back burner. Your wedding needs to be about you and him, not a chore or an after thought. It’s horrible his family is acting like this!!
Post # 7
Could you have the wedding in your country?