- 7 years ago
- Wedding: May 2015
My SO and I have been together for almost 3 years now. The first year of our relationship was pretty great, the typical “honeymoon” phase I think. Then when he lost his job in the summer of 2010, things kinda went south. 2011 was a pretty horrible year, with 4 deaths happening through the year (one a week before Christmas). I just really felt our relationship took a downturn, both of us struggling with money, he literally had no job and was living off government checks, so dates were out of the question. Before he lost his job (he actually quit, but it’s a long story), we would go out on a monthly dinner date.
Over the past few year and a half, we kinda just fell into a rutt I guess you can say. He’s now been unemployed for almost 2 years, I work as much as I can, and we both are back in school full time, expecting to graduate in 2014. We see each other daily because we’re in the same classes too, and often spend an entire day together.
Lately we’ve been fighting a lot more than usual. Especially since we’ve been taking classes together (complete coincidence too). About an hour ago he stormed out of my place, because I got frustrated with him as he had no notes or books with him (we have a ton of papers and big assignments due this week), and he basically expected me to let him use all of my notes and books. He rarely brings a pen and paper to class, and always makes excuses to do something later. Then he’ll bug me when we’re in class asking how to do something the prof just explained 5 minutes previous because he didn’t bother to write it down!
I’m just so burnt out. He keeps telling me he wants to buy an engagement ring (I’m almost 24), that is his priority, but when he gets money, he spends a lot of it on things like coffee or food. I feel like he doesn’t try hard enough to get a job (I can count on one hand how many interviews he’s had). When I suggest calling places up to see if they are hiring, he gets annoyed.
I honestly do love him, but I’m at my breaking point. I’m sick of feeling more like friends/enemies then a loving couple. When it’s good, it’s really good. But times like right now where he storms out and won’t speak to me, I feel like I want to get up and leave this town. I know it’s also school that’s stressing me out and I don’t have much of a social life right now balancing full time school/work, but I feel like I’m not moving forward with him at all. I don’t absolutely need to be engaged right now, but I want to know that my future husband has some motivation in life. Everytime I talk about it, he ends up saying that I’m just not in a good mood at the moment, and I’ll get over it. I’m worried I’m wasting these years.
Any advice bees?