(Closed) He has the ring, asked for blessing… Still not engaged.

posted 4 years ago in Waiting
Post # 16
Member
12 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: April 2016

My fiance and I got engaged after almost 5 years of dating.  And we moved in with each other after 3 months of dating!

We were head over heels for each other (and still are)…we even got matching tattoos after 7 months of dating. BUT no ring until 5 years!! lol I was so confused, but we both expressed we wanted to get marrired by month 2 of dating.  

We did a short engagement (7 months) becasue I had waited so long 🙂

Post # 17
Member
85 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

Maybe he is planning the perfect proposal for you 🙂 My fiance had the ring kept for over a year, and i knew that because we went ring shopping together and there was a sale going on so I knew he had to get it. haha! I am very angsty, not so much to be engaged but to be surprised. I don’t like not knowing so I kept bugging him haha! But he planned the proposal for months and it was perfect. SO just be patient, I’m sure he’s working on it! 😉

Post # 19
Member
205 posts
Helper bee

View original reply
kwbride2015:  Do you know now why he waited several months with the ring, just out of curiosity? I mean, I’m not a dude, but wouldn’t that thing be burning a hole in your pocket/sock drawer/whatever?

Post # 20
Member
667 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

View original reply
illyana:  Waiting for a good moment I think.  I found out later he even brought it out on at least 1 occassion and decided nope not tonight.  He ended up proposing while my mom was in town and had her as our unknowing photographer.  He proposed at sunset on a bridge after a great day at the beach.  I was glad that I had put on some makeup and made myself look presentable after teh beach.  My mom was thrilled to be there.  I would not change a thing.

Post # 21
Member
318 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: November 2015

It’s my opinion that life is short and things in life happen (like death, illness, job loss, etc) that make it hard to plan the way things should go…so with that said, I never understand when someone in a relationship knows they want to propose but still hold off because they’re waiting for the right moment. The right moment will never happen! Life gets in the way, and if you wait for a time when life doesn’t get in the way, you’ll probably wait forever.

He says he’s so excited to be your fiance and husband, and yet he hasn’t made a proposal plan yet and has kept you waiting for a while. I don’t doubt that he wants to marry you, but if he’s waiting for the right moment (a time when no one will be ill, no one will be moving, his job won’t be stressful and long, etc), he’ll be waiting endlessly.

I hope he proposes soon! Good luck, Bee!

Post # 22
Member
607 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: June 2017

I would not be happy waiting 2 years when I know he has the ring. My fiance told me in 2014 that he was going to propose in 2015 for sure. Well 2015 came and went and I was so agitated. I had to have a talk with him because he kept telling me the same thing “it will happen”, every other month. We’d had been dating for almost 5 years. I know many bees may not agree with me, but I don’t think it’s fair for a woman to sit around and wait for her man to propose. No! Not everyone can have a smile on their face waiting for the day he proposes. I would ask him what is the reason for his stalling? Sorry, it doesn’t take 2 years to plan a proposal.

Post # 23
Member
1764 posts
Buzzing bee

He asked for a blessing 2 years ago?!!! OK, now I seriously want you to ask yourself: how important is the actual proposal? How important do you think the proposal is to him? Because if it were me I would confront him. By this time the only thing I would care about is actually being married, proposing is just a technicality. So I would sit him down and demand we actually set a wedding date.

Post # 24
Member
9365 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper

 

He keeps saying “it will happen.” 

See, I just don’t understand . Where is  OP  in this ?   Sitting waiting  for ‘it’ to ‘happen’ as if she was a specator in her own life is where . How  is that even  half way acceptable  in this day and age.

And yupmarried above makes a good  point – by now OP  should be planning to get actually  married, not  waiting a  possible few more years until the  only person who is ( apparently ) allowed to make a decision  does so .  Life is full of unexpected events , does he think  no more are going to happen ? And even if they do, what in the name of goodness is stopping him saying “here is the  ring  dearest  OP, shall we set the date  “?   

 

 

Post # 25
Member
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

OMG this sounds like me.  My SO asked for my dad’s blessing over a year ago now!  I have no idea if he has the ring, but my dad has apparently confronted my SO twice over the fact that he asked for the blessing and has still not proposed.  My SO has no idea I know all of this and it is slowly killing me inside!! 

Post # 27
Member
51 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

My guy asked me 2 weeks ago, and we’re getting married in 6 weeks. I can barely wait, I don’t know how you lasted 2 years. I would’ve found another man and married him in that much time lol.

Post # 29
Member
1350 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2017

View original reply
MissyDear:  I actually found out because my dad inadvertently let it slip a couple of months after he gave his blessing. I think he expected my SO to propose quickly and, when it didn’t happen, he was pretty confused. He said a few telling things and then eventually it fully came out because my dad is so bad at secrets. I also confirmed it with two mutual friends, one of whom is married and her husband said my SO told him he got my dad’s blessing. So 4 friends plus my family all know. My SO has no clue that that many people know and that I know. He just thinks my dad and my friend’s husband know and that is it! But I’m sort of trying to keep it that way because I keep hoping my SO will ask already and he will think it is still a surprise. It’s starting to be quite upsetting it hasn’t happened though and I’m questioning what the issue is…

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