Post # 1
Yep I’m just in that weird limbo ‘not yet engaged but basically engaged… getting used to the idea of being engaged’ phase that I’ve read about in other peoples’ posts, but didn’t really understand until now! Pretty sure he has the ring. His friends are even writing thinly veiled ‘so did you propose yet? how’d it go?’ posts on his facebook! His parents toasted to 2012 as being ‘a year for marriage’. I think he was going to do it at Christmas but it just wasn’t the right time for a variety of reasons, relationship-wise and logistics-wise. Plus we were just so busy. How long until it’s weird that he has had the ring but has not proposed? Are his friends all going to feel sorry for me for not being engaged yet when we go out for new years, and wonder if he changed his mind? Is this the part where I have to like .. be zen and force myself just not to think about it?
Post # 3
I’m not sure there is a clear cut answer to this. My SO has had the ring for 4 months now and I know guys can hang on to rings waiting for the “perfect time” The only difference for us is none of his friends or family knows he has the ring and only my parents and a few of my friends know. It’s hard and frustrating being at this point I know trust me I do! We can only hope it happens soon. Guys don’t understand how hard this part is on us!
Post # 4
Yep, at this point the best thing to do would be “zen” as you say. From what I’ve read on these boards, talking engagement all the time deters men from actually jumping in and proposing. Makes sense I suppose.
I’m in a similar situation to you, in that my SO and I have been talking engagement for over a year (he brought it up). We looked at rings, I showed him the one I wanted and he agreed it was perfect – still nothing. For the holidays, EVERYONE was making comments. I even walked in the room as his grandmother asked in broken english “So when is wedding? She nice girl!” His response was “Soon, very soon.” So I continue to wait, and wonder, what the definition of “soon” means. It is comforting to know that it is definitely coming up, but seriously guy, it’s been a year. It is so frustrating knowing it’s coming, but no idea when!
But I don’t think you have to worry about what his friends will think – if everyone knows it is coming, they will probably just be anxious and excited for you! Good luck!
Post # 5
Men are notorious for having the ring but waiting for that perfect moment. Has hard as it is, try and be patient. All the clues are there that you should be getting a proposal soon. Keep us posted!!