(Closed) He has the ring… This is worse then knowing he doesnt have it….=/

posted 5 years ago in Waiting
Post # 2
280 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2016

I’m sorry girl! I have a feeling that he’ll do it soon, especially if you’re getting married this fall! I found out in January that my boyfriend has had my ring since early October…and he still hasn’t asked! Some days it drives me crazy knowing it’s in our safe and not on my finger, but other days I’m just happy he actually has it.

You’re an amazing person for not bringing up wedding stuff, I try but it doesn’t work haha. Keep your chin up! Would he be okay with doing some planning before you have the ring? After all, a lot of Bees here seem to go with the “engagement doesn’t mean ring” philosophy. To me, it sounds like you’re there!

Post # 3
623 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: February 2016

He will do it when he finds the right moment! Let him figure out when that is and don’t let him know that you know. This is a big moment for him as well as you. I picked out the ring with my fiance and he asked me to please let him propose when he wanted to/how he wanted to without asking questions (he knows me, haha). He did when he was ready and it was the best moment of my life thus far. Hang in there!!

Post # 3
375 posts
Helper bee

Good luck! I am in the same boat as you. My SO has the ring but hasn’t proposed yet. It’s driving me nuts and I agree that it’s almost worse than the other waiting, but I’m sure some other waiting bees would disagree.

Before we picked out the ring and he bought it, we were just growing as a couple and getting to the point where we were both ready to make that committment…now that we’re at this place, it just seems more immediate and therefore I’m way more antsy and excited than I was before. While I was waiting (for us to be to the point where we were ready for marriage), I just had fun and didn’t think too much of it, knowing that he’d be ready when he was ready and that until then, we would just enjoy life as a couple. But after he was ready and let me know this, my mind suddenly switched over to OH WE’RE READY LET’S GET THIS SHOW ON THE ROAD. I have to keep reminding myself of the way I was before he bought the ring but sometimes I get a little excited. Every weekend I wonder “will this be it?” but luckily I don’t get mad or anything when it doesn’t happen…And honestly I’ve gotten a lot better at waiting for him to choose his proposal (since I knew when he bought the ring and exactly what it looks like, it’s important for him to put together a nice surprise proposal) the longer it’s taking him. He’s had the ring for about seven or eight weeks. 

However, we consider ourselves unofficially engaged and last weekend we decided on our budget. I’m just waiting for that official proposal, which sounds a lot like your situation. 

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