He said he is not attracted to me?

posted 1 month ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
372 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2019

If he can’t handle a little extra weight what is he going to do when you have a baby, or get hurt or sick? Even if you can get “toned enough” for him there will be ups and downs where you fluctuate, I would never be able to live knowing I had to be perfect all the time. I gained 10 pounds after our wedding and now 5 months later I’m just starting to lose it, I just needed to not have pressure on how I looked (pressure I put on myself for the wedding, not from him or anyone else) and then I got myself back into a good routine. But if he suddenly wasn’t attracted because I had a little extra on my stomach, I’d re think the marriage

Post # 17
Member
11469 posts
Sugar Beekeeper

It’s not the so called “lie” that was the problem. Give me a break. It’s the disgusting idea that brute honesty is anything but offensive and cruel. This was either an ultimatum or an invitation to break up with him so he doesn’t have to do it. It also puts the blame on you so his fragile ego doesn’t have to suffer. Nobody forced him to date you. He led you on and wasted your time. I’d have said goodbye and good riddance on the spot. 

Post # 18
Member
10202 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 2010

downonmulberry :  

Here is the original quote.

 

.  . . if you can’t handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.

—Marilyn Monroe

 

 

   

Post # 19
Member
2830 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2018

I also don’t understand why he started dating you if he apparently only likes women with zero body fat (good luck finding that, buddy)?

Most people have a type, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with that, you can’t help what you’re attracted to but I would not want to change myself in order to make a guy want me. My ex was like that after I gained a little bit of weight, we’d been together for years at that point so it was hard to hear. 

Ive gained some weight since being with my husband which I am working hard to lose, I can’t imagine if he told me I was too big to have sex with 🙁 

If you want to get toned, that’s awesome, do it for yourself and forget about this guy.

Post # 20
Member
743 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: City, State

sassy411 :  I hate that it’s probably quoted constantly, but it’s so trueeeeeeee

Post # 21
Member
9557 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

Fuck that guy and his needle dick.

Post # 23
Member
802 posts
Busy bee

I don’t see any way you can continue dating this guy. You will always feel insecure especially since he lied to you for so long about an issue you knew in your heart WAS an issue for him. He has a very unrealistic view of the female body (“no fat if you want me to be attracted to you”). 

 

He’s not worth it, bee.

Post # 24
Member
480 posts
Helper bee

This guy is a douchebag with a tiny dick. I have about 40 lbs on the guy I’m with now and we have no problem with anything. Him saying that shit is horrible.

Don’t put yourself through more emotional pain by being with him. You can find a guy who loves your body for what it is and treats you as so.

Post # 25
Member
180 posts
Blushing bee

sassy411 :  not that it really matters, but Marilyn Monroe never said that.  For some bizarre reason people love to put fake quotes over images of old Hollywood stars.

Post # 26
Member
734 posts
Busy bee

.  . . if you can’t handle me at my worst, you sure as hell don’t deserve me at my best.

—Mahatma Gandhi

There, I fixed that  *snicker*cool

*showing myself the door*

Post # 27
Member
1067 posts
Bumble bee

I think this is a good hard wakeup call about his character.  

Please do not choose a man you will always be struggling to feel good enough for, to keep your qualification. 

He is living in a fantasy. If he truly loved you, even if he likes fit bodies, your loose skin would not bother him. 

God forbid, you age, get injured, maybe a haircut he doesn’t like. 

You don’t deserve to worry about withholding affections. 

Please find someone who is deeper on the inside. 

 

Post # 30
Member
68 posts
Worker bee

Good heavens! This guy is “smaller” and has trouble “completing the act,” so he blames everything on your figure. What a joke!

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