He seemed crazy about me but he dumped me

posted 2 years ago in Relationships
Post # 16
Member
5049 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

You told him you were not ready.  You told him you were still not over your ex.  You told him your doubts about making a long distance relationship work.

It seems to me that he listened and took you word for it, realizing you were not ready to be in a fully committed relationship with him.  Whether or not he was infatuated with you it seems he was smart enough to realize you were not ready and has made the decision to move on.

Did you expect he would keep chasing you?

Post # 17
Member
10660 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: City, State

lostgirl123 :  

When a guy comes on that strong in the beginning, it’s a giant red flag. It sounds like he waaaayyy overdid it.

He didn’t know you well enough to be crazy about you yet.  

Do you really want a guy who is so pushy?  Your description about him not being able to be away from you for a ‘second’ sounds suffocating.

I doubt anything you said about your reluctance chased him off.  He ran right over those feelings like a freight train and basically overwhelmed you.

File this one under lessons learned.  Guys who come on too strong, too early should be approached with extreme caution.

Post # 19
Member
6580 posts
Bee Keeper

“I dont like you”

“I dont like you”

“I dont like you”

“I dont like you”

“I dont like you”

“I dont like you”

“OMG HOW DARE YOU BREAK UP WITH ME?!?!?!”

Time to move on OP.

 

Post # 20
Member
601 posts
Busy bee

It sounds like he was rather pushy and you somewhat distant and hesitant. So not the best match? Maybe your talk about not knowing how this would work out due to the distance was finally too distant for him? Overall it sounds like you dodged a bullet, people who get that clingy that fast can often (albeig not always) mean trouble… Take time to heal and prioritize selfcare!

Post # 21
Member
2690 posts
Sugar bee

This has to be a joke!!

Post # 22
Member
731 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: July 2017

lostgirl123 :  no offense but it sounds to me like he broke up with you so that he can hook up with, or at least meet wother women. you had a long distance relationship, he wants to go to nightclubs and you had to ASK him to stop doing that. Pardon if my wording is harsh, but he’s not going to tie himself down to a long distance relationship with someone who’s unsure of their feelings about him … when he has the potential to meet other women that live closer to him who ARE interested. Sounds like he found someone else that caught his interest. Good thing this ended before you caught too many feelings too! 

Post # 23
Member
748 posts
Busy bee

It was lust, period. Move on, you didn’t like him anyway. 

Post # 25
Member
212 posts
Helper bee

You’re not hurt, your ego is. You’ll be fine in a week.

Wait two breakups in three months? Those aren’t breakups, they’re flings. Why are you on a wedding site?

Post # 26
Member
14940 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

No one wants to be a rebound.  The chase is fun.  He chased, he got, he realized he didn’t want or it was more hassle than it was worth.  It’s only been 3 months, get over the ex (which usually doesnt mean talking to the new guy about the break up) before dating again.

Post # 27
Member
649 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

lostgirl123 :  he sounds like an unpleasant character. You told him multiple times you’re not interested. He kept pursuing you anyway until you basically went “fine, I’ll date you…” and then once you let him into your life, dumped you. Maybe stop dwelling on why he pursued you and why he dumped you, and be relieved he’s out of your hair.

That wouldn’t have been a relationship. That would have been a bad case of people-pleasing.

Post # 29
Member
4496 posts
Honey bee

He didn’t dump you all of a sudden.  He dumped you after you said you didn’t see how this would work because of the distance and then he basically agreed with you instead of playing whatever game it was you wanted him to play to chase you more.  It really isn’t that complicated.  When you act aloof and talk in doublespeak instead of saying what you actually mean, eventually people are going to get turned off and find someone more suitable who doesn’t play games.

Post # 30
Member
5049 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2017

lostgirl123 :  You should take a good long break from dating to work on yourself and once you are ready to date again try getting involved with someone who is not long distance.  It has twice now contributed to the demise of your relationships.

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