Post # 1
We’re arguing about rings and we’re not even engaged yet. I think he’s been shopping though (possibly even bought ering+w-ring??) and during a conversation, said he will not allow me to wear my engagement ring at work! I practically live at work and I want to wear it! 🙁
I also suggested maybe just one ring, same one for engagement and wedding, because I like the way a single ring looks better than having two on the same finger, and he said no, no, no. I’m getting quite frustrated that he’s not listening to what I want. But….I also don’t know if he already purchased and that could be a reason he insists on both. But, I just want to wear one and I want to wear it all the time!!
Post # 2
- Wedding: October 2019 - Chateau Lake Louise
sdarrach25 : He won’t “let” you?
You are a grown ass woman. An engagement ring is a gift. It is not for him to dictate where and when you wear it. Don’t continue to discuss it.
Post # 3
sdarrach25 : “not allowed” isn’t part of any healthy adult relationship.
Post # 4
sdarrach25 : I don’t get it, he doesn’t let you wear your e ring to work but insists you need to wear both rings at all times? I’m not sure what you mean. And what’s his reason for not letting you wear the ring? If it’s unreasonable, there’s no need for further discussion
Post # 5
I’d never marry someone who wouldn’t “let” me wear whatever jewelry I wanted, whenever I wanted. Engagement rings are intended to be worn.
Post # 6
sdarrach25 : I don’t get why he doesn’t want you to wear it at work. We need some more info here.
Post # 7
Really need more info. Sounds like he doesn’t want people to know you’re engaged?
Post # 8
If Fiance said that to me, I don’t know how I’d be able to stop from laughing at the ridiculousness of that statement.
Post # 9
Umm… no. Been there, done that, bought the t-shirt (with controlling guys). He doesn’t get to tell you what you can wear and when. It should also be about your preference for style and such with the ring(s) if you are discussing this and he is aware. I would say if I’m not “allowed” to pick it and wear it when I please, I won’t be accepting it.
Post # 10
Not allowed? ?? Pffff if anything any SO would want you to keep your ring on at all times . What’s his reason ?
Post # 11
I work in an auto parts store and he doesn’t want me to wear an expensive piece of jewelry like that in that environment. I work around oil and dirty car parts, etc. But it’s not like I’m rolling in it.
Post # 12
sdarrach25 : ohhhh . . . Have you heard of yourringhero.com? It’s kind of overpriced for what it is, but it has a cute printed ring on it and it’s not an ugly silicone ring (sorry, Qalo people).
If I get into weights the way I want to again, that’s my solution to having my ring with me, on me, but I won’t do any damage to it. I think it’d be a great solution to outdoors activities, too. I also have cats, so open ring holders aren’t an option for me. Lol
Post # 13
Red flag! Might want to consider whether you even want a ring from someone who feels entitled to tell you when and where they will “let” you wear it.
And, um, I own and work a metal fab / repair shop. Grubby business. When it is safe to wear my rings I certainly do so! Be safe, then just insure it and wear it!
Post # 14
If he legit thinks he’s allowed to tell you what you can and cannot do, that’s not okay.
If he’s more so saying ‘I don’t want you wearing a super expensive and important piece of jewelery working on dirty cars’ I think that’s different. You’d be running the risk of damaging it, losing it, getting it caught on something, etc. I know someone who was working on their car and got their ring caught on something and had to have it cut off!
TBH I tell my husband he’s ‘not allowed’ to wear his ring to certain things. Working on the house, lifting weights, stuff like that. I am not actually controlling him when I say ‘babe you’re not allowed to wear your ring when you are working on the plumbing!’.
Post # 15
Just to be clear, I’m not actually working on cars. I’m not a car mechanic. I mostly drive, delivering car parts and bringing back an occasional dirty core. Sometimes batteries, etc. But it’s not often I actually even get my hands dirty!