(Closed) Heart to Heart Gone Wrong

posted 7 years ago in Relationships
Post # 16
1051 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I’m no expert in guy-speak, but if he said that he’s unsure of your relationship, then you have to believe him.

I think you unintentionally put a LOT of pressure on him when you said you would go to the courthouse “right now”.  He obviously is not on the same page as you.

I was talking to DH about relationships once, and he said if a guy doesn’t know if he wants to marry you after a year of dating, then you’re not “the one”.  That doesn’t mean you’ll get married after a year, but according to him, most guys know right away whether they want to eventually marry you.

It sounds to me like he wants out.  I know that’s not what you want to hear, but I don’t think he could have been any clearer than he was.

Post # 17
13649 posts
Honey Beekeeper

I’m sorry the conversation did not work out how you hoped.  I can honestly say that if any guy had ever said those words to me, at that stage of the relationship, it would no longer be about what he wanted.  I’d be done myself, and moving on. 

Post # 18
177 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

View original reply
peachykeener:  If he said he’s not sure about the relationship, that really tells you everything right there, doesn’t it?  I know you don’t want it to be over because you have invested years into the relationship but if he isn’t sure, then do you really want to spend MORE years on a guy who doesn’t know if he really wants to be with you?  As hard as it is, you need to leave.

Post # 20
804 posts
Busy bee

View original reply
peachykeener:  🙁 that really sucks. You sound like you’ve made the mature and right decision for you at the moment, and that’s all you can really do. I hope everything works out for you. Hugs.

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