(Closed) Heirloom rings: do I reset? What did you do?

posted 6 years ago in Rings
Post # 2
143 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: April 2015

I was not lucky enough to inherit an heirloom ring but if I were you, I would leave it as is. You can always have it reset later on. Or maybe when you both are settled in your careers, you can get a different ring as an upgrade. Your grandma’s ring sounds beautiful and you also seem to have an emotional attachment to it. How about keeping the ring as is and getting a black diamond eternity wedding band? You may grow to love it. We picked my ring knowing we would upgrade it one day but now I can’t imagine trading it in for anything. 

Post # 3
2414 posts
Buzzing bee

I have my grandmother’s small diamond and her very heavy 18k wedding band and I’d never change anything about them.

I wear them all the time, the band was blessed in my wedding, and they’re engraved with my grandma and grandpa’s wedding dates.

If you love yours and they fit, they’re already perfect. Why mess with them?

Post # 4
390 posts
Helper bee

I am a big fan of leaving heirlooms as-is, especially since you like it! 

Post # 6
4640 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

It sounds like a beautiful ring. How about leaving it as is and resetting it later if you feel like it? See how it feels after you wear it for a few weeks and get used to wearing it as is on your finger?

Any pictures?

Post # 7
9575 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2015

I’d definitely keep it as is. You can always get a black diamond ring for your right hand but you can’t get another beloved grandmas ering. 

Post # 10
1610 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2014 - Cape May

My suggestion to you- give yourself time to wear her ring before jumping into a reset. You may decide you absolutely want a new setting and that’s great. Or you may decide the nostalgia of the original setting means more. It’s much harder to put it back together once you take it apart.

We were actually in a similar position with deciding on a reset for my grandma’s ring before getting engaged. DH (at the time FI) insisted we keep her ring intact in the original setting. He was afraid I would one day regret dismantling it. I know it was the right decision for us. In the end we wound up replicating her set and selecting our own stone together for my set. I still look at her rings every day and I’m glad we didn’t alter them in any way.

Post # 12
2414 posts
Buzzing bee

Not easy to photograph! The diamond is about 25 points, and according to a couple of local jewelers, a nearly pefect stone.

Replacement value is next to nothing, but its value to me is priceless.

The band is so heavy that youcan feel its weight when it’s dropped into the palm of your hand.

It is INDEED a comfort to me to wear it, and in times of trouble I often choose it over my much flashier diamond and band. 

Post # 13
626 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2016

If you’re on the fence, I would err on the side of not resetting it since it already fits, doesn’t sound terribly outdated, and has sentimental value. You can always reset it later if you get bored with it.

Just get it dipped (re-rhodium plated) and have the setting checked to make sure the stone isn’t loose and have it tightened up if it is. When you get it cleaned and dipped it will look like new.

Post # 14
4943 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

Oh how I would have loved to have had an heirloom ring! If I had, I would have left it alone. In your case, since you seem unsure, I’d err on the side of leaving it alone until you know for sure as a PP said. Maybe leave the ering as is, but get a wedding band with the black diamonds in it..? 

Give yourself some time with it. If you reset it too soon, you might end up regretting it. I’d suggest living with it for a while and then deciding. By then it may not even be a big deal to you. πŸ™‚

Would love to see a picture of it. πŸ™‚

Post # 15
692 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2016

View original reply
kitkatkels:  hmmm.. tough situation! I got an heirloom diamond, but the diamond came from FI’s family not mine so it does change things a little. 

 FI’s mom passed away when he was like 13 but his parents had seperated before her passing, neither ever remarried. About 6 months into our relationship his dad told Fiance that he had been keeping FI’s mom’s ring for him and that he could have it to reset or trade in. it was set as a solitaire in a yellow gold band. (literally the complete opposite of anything i would ever choose for myself) i feel that because FI’s dad was not very attached to the ring staying exactly “as is” it made it easier for Fiance to reset it to a double halo (as hinted haha) however, i did tell Fiance that i would love to wear her diamond. 

that being said, for me, having her diamond in my setting was the perfect combination of taking an heirloom and making it my own to pass on if we so choose. it’s a bit of her, a bit of me. but then again, her setting was totally plain so it’s not like we were “giving up” anything, you know? i don’t know it that helps at all, my main point is that resetting it will make it a little bit of both of you…

anyway, here is a pic! πŸ™‚


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