Post # 1
Would you wear a family ring from a relationship that failed? My bf’s mother has offered him her ring. I’ve never seen the ring myself so I can’t say if I like the setting or not, but I don’t want even the stone because my bf’s mother was abused by her husband and left after he started in on the kids. I would want either a new ring or an heirloom one with positive memories (e.g. my SIL has my grandmother’s ring from their 50+ yr marriage), not one with negative ones. Fortunately, this is unlikely to be a problem for me as my bf has agreed he wouldn’t want to give that to me. Anyone else feel this way? Please note, I’m generally not a “karma” style person, just here.
Post # 3
It wouldn’t bother me. I’m usually pretty sentimental on stuff, but that wouldn’t be an issue. The only time I’d have a problem with it is (and I cannot imagine this ever happening) if he tried to give me a ring he’d given to another woman before. From his failed marriage or engagement? NO WAY. But from someone else’s? I’d not care.
Is the ring the one his father gave his mother? If that were the case, I’d have even less problem with it…just because no matter how much bad there was in the relationship, it is the one that made my Fiance possible.
Post # 4
We had a cursed diamond.
My grandma got it from her Fiance – then he ended the engagement – she kept the ring.
She gave it to my uncle when he proposed, then his Fiance broke off the engagement and so she gave it back.
So my grandma gave it to my mom (who was already married) and my mom had it set with 2 other diamonds in her engagement ring – then two of the diamonds fell out. Definitely cursed.
Post # 5
I don’t believe in bad juju, but I will admit that I would feel weird taking a ring about which I knew so much negative history. I would worry more that I would dwell on that negative history every time I saw it more than anything else – and that it might become a self-fulfilling prophecy.
Post # 6
Nope, I don’t believe rings can carry karma. I’d take it. I think I am, actually LOL!
Post # 7
I said no – not really because I think it’s cursed or whatever – but because I feel like it would be a reminder of the abusive relationship.
Post # 8
I would use the stones and metal to make something custom.
Post # 9
I’d probably use it to make another type of jewelry. Maybe a necklace or something.
Post # 10
I would have it re-set into a more personal setting. I don’t think the stone is cursed, but I would look down at the ring (if it weren’t re-set) and always think of the failed relationship. But not if it were a setting of my choice!
Post # 11
I wouldnt use it but Im weird like that.
Post # 12
I wouldn’t want someone else’s ring, period, but especially not if its history included an abusive relationship.
Post # 13
I do kind of feel like objects “absorb” the energy of the person who handles them on a daily basis, especially something as personal as jewelry. (I can totally feel my grandfather when I wear his wedding ring :). To that end, if you’re religious, I would take the ring and have your pastor bless it/wash it in holy water/etc… and if not, uh… maybe take it to a psychic and have the negative energy expunged? (cripes I sound like a looney toones here… )
Post # 14
My Fiance and I were engaged once before. We got his great-grandmother’s ring. It was beautiful- 2 ct. flawless diamond, in a diamond and sapphire pave platinum setting. It was made in the 20’s. Well we ended up breaking off the engagement two years later because Fiance and I were having problems meeting in the same place (I assumed that b/c he gave me the ring he wanted to get married and move forward, but he kept putting off setting a date and I realized he just gave me the ring because his parents pressured him and to keep me “happy”.). Well we later found out that the ring was more or less cursed, we also found out that we were the fourth generation to use the ring. His great-grandmother died in childbirth at 26, his grandparents divorced, and his uncle and aunt had a very ugly divorce. We used the ring and almost broke up. Needless to say when he proposed again (and this time he meant it! We set a date right away!<3) we got a new ring. His father is now using it for an e-ring for the woman he left my FI’s mother for after 28 years of marriage, and we are just waiting for something to happen to that relationship as well. So yes, I will NEVER use heirloom jewelery from a negative relationship again.
Post # 15
I guess Kate Middleton is screwed…
Post # 16
I think it’d be more of a reminder that his mom values you, and would be touched that she’s offered it, even if I didn’t accept it. You can always tell her (upon seeing it) that you’re worried about losing it, it’d be great to pass onto a daughter, maybe the setting isn’t you, or it won’t mesh with your preferred wedding band type, etc.