- 6 years ago
- Wedding: April 2016
Hmm…I apoogize if this is in the wrong board. I couldn’t seem to find a “Just dropped in, please be nice to me.” newbie board.
It is a pleasure to be here! Like many of you, I’m here because, well, I’m in love!
*Mushy lovestory warning*
I’m in the “Engaged without a ring-but it’s coming” boat. Fiance and I have known each other since we were twelve year old gaming nerds. We’re still gaming nerds, but older now. We actually met on the internet as kids over our fondness for Sonic the Hedgehog, which we still play together once in a while to this day. Friendship blossomed into something more, but we lived across the country from each other!
My amazing parents decided “Hey, let’s go take a road trip for summer vacation. Is there any place you want to stop by, Floofy?” in which they were met with a very enthusiastic “Oh my god, really? Michigan!” as if I were chirping on about Disneyland. They already knew about him so the reason came as no surprise. So off we went. I know a lot of people would find this reasoning a bit odd, maybe even dangerous. Meeting someone off the internet and all…but we all booked a hotel room, and I met Fiance for the first time in a hotel hallway.
We played tag, I stole his hat and his first kiss(he almost fell backwards, shh.) it was awkward at first, but nothing had changed. He was the same person I already knew. My family adored him from day one since he had the same smartass-y sense of humor they had.
Years went by and we took turns visiting. One particular visit makes me smile the most. He spent Christmas with us, and then his birthday. My family welcomed him with open arms and made sure he felt loved. I knew right then that they felt a deep attachment to him.
Sadly, at the age of about, oh…seventeen, I cracked under the pressure. “I can’t do this anymore.” It hurt too much to love someone and be so far away. Life was getting harder, both of our cushy rugs were pulled out from under us. I broke up with him because honestly, I was hurting and wanted someone to physically be there.
We didn’t speak regularly for two years, going on our separate ways. We dated other people, suffered incredible loss, but life went on. I won’t go into detail, but “loss” is the only way I can describe it.
I wish I could say he came riding in on a white horse, but reality isn’t always ideal. I grew a lot from pain, learning the cruelty of others and vowing that I would become a better person. My world was expanding not by living life as a free spirited adult, but changed by the ugliness around me. Somehow, instead of bitter…it made me kinder. My heart, while damaged, felt open.
A White Knight did come into my life, but I wasn’t happy. Life was becoming normal and I had nothing to be afraid of anymore. You would think this White Knight of mine had been the answer to my prayers, that he would be “enough”…but my heart wasn’t in it. Fiance was also dating someone else, but was also unhappy. One night on my birthday, Fiance popped online. I hadn’t heard from him in over a year and I was filled with both excitement and anger.
We began talking again, and just like that, I had my best friend back(yes I know people refer to their SO as Best Friend but he truly was.) we spoke every day and played MMORPGs(online games) together. It was little, but enough that he was back in my life even in this small way.
I’ll keep this brief; we each broke up with our partners. Things were getting bad for each of us long before we saw each other again. On my end, I found out my then-SO simply liked being the big hero to “broken” women. Hah! I may have been down on my luck, but I was never broken.
My parents were overjoyed to hear Fiance and I were friends again. I would voice my woes and my mother would tell me. “Don’t worry, you’re going to end up with Mr. Floofy.” she always knew this, how…I don’t know. My father, who was cold and intimidating to my other partners, asked how his “son in law” was doing. Yes, bees…I was floored!
Fiance and I got back together in the strangest way. It was Valentines day(I know, I know) and he had told me he created a mix for Valentines day for all his friends. Fiance is good at DJing, and it was a real treat…until I realized every single song’s lyrics were talking about ME! and I then noticed I was the only one in the room even listening to it, despite he “invited everyone”…you would think this would be glaringly obvious; it wasn’t. I asked my friend about it first, feeling insecure…what if I was being pigheaded and just assuming it was all about me? I’d die from embarrassment. Ladies, I’d be eating dirt!
I shyly told him how I felt, not once mentioning the music. I tried to play it “cool”, like this was just some phase I was going through and I apologized if it bothered him. Yeah…real smooth. Luckily, Fiance is not a dense cake, and knew what I was trying to say. Then we had real words-that I can’t remember because I was sitting in disbelief, thinking “REALLY? He still loves me? Sweet marion berry pie, he loves me!”
So, we LD dated again, taking things slow. You can’t pick up where you left off, we had to start from square one. Fi visited again, my parents were ALL OVER him. I recall my mother saying “Welcome home” and my father giving him a native american necklace that had been in our family. I knew that was my father’s way of saying “I treasure you as part of this family.”
A year later, I moved all the way to Michigan to be here! Fiance couldn’t move to my state due to his disability so this was the easiest way. FI’s family is fond of me and very kind, and his friends have latched onto me immediately. I learned as soon as I got here how relieved everyone was that Fiance was with me, that he looked the happiest he had in years. FI’s ex continued(this had been going on for some time) to harass him, bringing her friends into it stating “No one will ever love you the way I loved you. Good luck ever finding someone who will care about your crippled ass.” Yeah…I stayed out of it. I don’t understand this charitable mindset, but anyways…
We have a good life, rich in memories and affection. We will never have a big luxurious lifestyle, but none of that stuff matters. I feel like I’ve already won what I wanted most in this world, and in a way I feel luckier than some. We’re still growing, but this time together. We both have our physical problems, but we take care of each other because we’re a team!
Fiance proposed while getting down on his good knee after we had finished eating pizza. After I said yes, he said he wanted to do it “formally”, so here I sit. He says “Christmas I’m getting you a ring.” while teasingly slipping his hands over my ring finger. Bees, the poor guy has had proposal-brain for months now. He sees some cute proposal on Youtube(he found them, not me!) he gets all sad and says “I wish I thought of that” and goodness, he is VERY vocal in saying what he was going to do. Ahhh it is torture, hive. I’d like just a walk through the snow, but whatever it is he plans is going to be SO special! I still consider pizza-night our true propsal, however.
Most recently he gushed to our hairdresser that we’re engaged. I’ve never seen a man so excited, and he wants an e-ring too because he’s so proud. I’d like a morganite(okay, I wish for a pink moissanite but maybe an upgrade is in the later future?) rose gold ring. He wants a titanium ring. So the hunt is on for both of us!
Oh, bees…I’m so nervous and anxious for Christmas this year! What do you think of this ring?
If you are still reading this, in which I am in awe of your patience, thanks for reading! It’s going to be a blast here so let’s help each other from now on.